Saturday, 20 November 2021

November 20, 1991: I was in a rut. My collages were tiresome, I hadn't taken a photo in a long time and I had so much undeveloped film and unprinted negatives


Thirty years ago today

            On Wednesday I got up at around 8:30 and called some moving companies. Some company in Etobicoke said I could apply.
            I had pea soup and toast with margarine for breakfast. 
            I called Nancy but apparently, she had gone away for the day with her mother. I watched TV and did some work. 
            It took half an hour to go through even an old newspaper. 
            After the midday news, I went to Etobicoke to fill out the application and came back at about 17:00. 
            I still couldn't reach Nancy. She had come back but gone out again to the Scarborough Town Centre. Later on when I tried she'd come back and gone out again to Bamburgh Plaza. I tried until late in the evening but never did catch her at home. 
            I watched more TV and did some more work. My collages were getting tiresome and I was in a rut. I hadn't taken a photo in a long time and I had so much undeveloped film and unprinted negatives.

Friday, 19 November 2021

Mourning the Death of an Abstraction


            On Thursday morning I finished posting my translation of “Belinda” by Serge Gainsbourg and started listening to his song “Mangos.” I'll memorize at least the first verse tomorrow. 
            I weighed 87.7 kilos before breakfast. I had time to eat five clementines and sip some coffee before leaving for tutorial. 
            Some tables were removed from the classroom and so I didn't have to shift any forward to make room behind me. 
            The attendance question was “What did you do that you enjoyed over reading week?” A lot of students went to Montreal and or listened to Taylor Swift's new release. I was the only one who said they did school work. Sarah asked if I listened to Taylor Swift as well and her tone seemed a little sarcastic as if I wouldn't listen to her because of my age. 
            As I Lay Dying is part of the Faulkner universe, which is like the Marvel universe but his world is like ours. The same fictional county was the location for most of his stories. Some characters cross over as in The Sound and the Fury and Absalom. The motif is the disintegration of a wealthy family in the south. It's a peasant class in As I Lay Dying. 
            The genre is Modernism. Realism represented the real but some say Modernism is more real. Southern Gothic. 
            Mourning. Sarah says she's writing on mourning and the climate crisis. 
            I said As I Lay Dying while I was reading it was sometimes depressing and sometimes funny. But the whole thing is funny in retrospect. 
            After WWI the world was fragmented and so Modernism came into being. 
            Mourning. Background. Freud and Derrida. Mourning is conscious while melancholy is unconscious. We can experience mourning even if we lose an abstraction. It is important to mourn loss. Mourning is viewed as a work task one must do. It is normal to come across the “work” of mourning. The process of mourning is reality testing as Freud says. Our relationship to reality. It is revealed that the love object no longer exists. The demand is to sever our attachment to it. If we keep it we are delusional and pretending. It is understandable to not want to sever the attachment. If one's partner dies we don't just get another. The tendency to not want to sever causes turning away from reality and holding the object in an hallucinatory wish cycle. We pretend it still exists. The task is not immediate but over time, piece by piece, fragmented. 
            How this text might be presenting features of mourning. There is a physical enactment of mourning in Cash's coffin. It is anticipatory. Derrida says mourning is anticipatory. 
            I said Vardaman seems to be in denial. He thinks Addie is still alive. 
            Addie is spoken of in the present tense. 
            Jewel is Addie's love object. He is not Anse's kid. Jewel is taller and so above. We only know him through others so he is objectified. 
            I said Darl is also an object missed at the end of the novel. He was also taken away more unjustly than Addie. 
            Teeth can be an object even if one doesn't have them. Anse's reaction to Addie's death.
            I said bananas are suggested as a substitute for a train. 
            I said Darl is pure consciousness and so he has no object. All things are his objects. 
            Everybody has substitutes but Darl has none. He fought in WWI. He reaches paralysis and doesn't complete mourning. 
            Anse is happy in the end. 
            I said I don't think it is obvious that Dewey Dell was raped since the text does not say so. This started a whole argument with several women taking the opposite view. Paco agreed with me.
            I didn't have a chance to say that I think that Addie is the dead American dream and the family is a microcosm of the United States with Darl as the United States consciousness. 
            I rode to Yonge and Bloor, south to King and west to Sudbury. Sudbury is a horrible street of townhouses that should be exiled to the suburbs where they belong. At the top of Sudbury is Queen and Gladstone where I went to Freshco. I bought five bags of grapes, two half-pints of raspberries, a bag of kettle chips, a pack of frozen salmon precooked in a Mediterranean style, a pack of ground chicken, five year old cheddar, two cans of peaches, a pepperoni sausage, Breton whole-grain crackers and skyr. I weighed 86.7 kilos when I got home. 
            I weighed 87.4 kilos at 17:45. 
            I finished editing my tutorial notes at 18:30. 
            I read most of Salvage the Bones by Jesmyn Ward. It reads like a young adult novel. Skeet has a white dog named China that has had puppies. But some of the puppies died from some sort of dog disease and Skeet has to steal some de-worming medicine from a white farmer's barn. The fourteen-year-old narrator Esch is pregnant. There's a basketball game and a fight between one of Esch's brothers and the guy that might have gotten her pregnant. Then there's an organized dog fight and it turns out that China is a fighting dog. She's pitted against her father and after a long battle she wins. All of this time a tropical storm out on the Gulf of Mexico has turned into a hurricane and it gradually makes its way up. The name of the hurricane is Katrina. When it makes land the house is flooded and the family has to climb on the roof and then jump and swim. China gets swept away. Lassie come home! 
            I made a new batch of gravy but I put too much flour in and it is almost too thick. I had a potato with gravy, two chicken wings and a chicken spine while watching an episode of Gomer Pyle. 
            In this story while Pyle is putting out a brush fire with the platoon he saves a rabbit and keeps it. When Sergeant Carter finds him with a rabbit he tells him to get rid of it. Gomer gives it to a little boy who says he'll have to ask his parents. Danny turns out to be Colonel Grey's nephew and he's visiting. The colonel says he can keep it if his parents say okay and they do. Gomer builds a rabbit hut for Danny in the woods behind the colonel's home and he and Danny name the bunny Harvey. But when Carter finds the rabbit hut he doesn't know about the colonel and he thinks Gomer has disobeyed his orders. Carter lets Harvey go. When Carter finds out that the colonel is involved he tries to get Harvey back. He and Gomer catch a rabbit but Danny says it's not Harvey. After several more rabbits it's still not the one. Finally Danny reveals that Harvey has a black spot on the back of his leg. Carter also learns that Danny's father is a brigadier general. Carter goes to a pet shop and buys a rabbit with a spot behind it's leg and gives it to Danny but it's the wrong leg. Carter tries to artificially put a spot on a rabbit in the right place. He tries paint, soot, marker and ink but Danny notices it's not real. At the last minute before Danny has to go home Gomer brings him Harvey. He says that Carter took so many rabbits out of the woods that Harvey was lonely and went back to the rabbit hut. A few days later Colonel Grey tells Carter that Harvey is doing fine but he wonders where the name Harvey came from. Gomer is about to explain but Carter interrupts and takes the credit. The colonel tells him Harvey just gave birth to three baby bunnies. 
            Danny was played by Bobby Riha, who starred in the movie “Jack and the Bean Stalk” and played Bruce on the Debbie Reynolds show. He is now a photojournalist.
            I finished reading Salvage the Bones. They survived Katrina but Skeet is still waiting for Lassie to come home. It's ironic that he's willing to risk the dog's life in brutal, bloody competitions while still mourning its loss. I didn't find the story that interesting, nor the characters. It was hard to tell a lot of the male characters apart.

November 19, 1991: The past life believing “counsellors” cancelled our appointment because they didn't want clients who were dealing with lawyers


Thirty years ago today 

             On Tuesday I got up at around 8:30 and called some moving companies. Scarborough Movers said for me to come there and apply. 
             At 9:00 I phoned the food bank and they said to come up before noon. I went there and got white bread; crackers; chow chow; canned beans, soups, corn, pineapple and tuna; packaged soup; and microwave pop corn, although I had no idea what I was going to do with that. 
            Scarborough Movers was at Morningside south of Lawrence but I walked a long way after getting off transit. I filled out an application and got home at around 17:00. 
            I tried to get in touch with Mike Copping but I couldn't reach him. 
            Nancy called and said our appointment with the past life “counsellors” in Kitchener was cancelled because they didn't want to counsel anyone who was already dealing with lawyers.

Thursday, 18 November 2021

Thordis Brandt


            On Wednesday morning I worked on editing the chord positions for “Belinda” by Serge Gainsbourg on my Christian's Translations blog. I should have it published tomorrow. 
            At 8:45 I logged into the Zoom meeting room for my Shakespeare lecture. 

           Three topics: Iago's motives; the actor in Shakespeare's time who played the role of Othello; the definition of Moor in his time and why he chose a Moor. 
           Iago's motive is unclear. He is prolific in statements of his motives but his actions conflict with them. The text makes it impossible to decide. His plans are also unclear. We ask why he decided to destroy Othello. Hate? Professor Lopez suggests it is not clear what his motive was. He didn't necessarily want Othello dead. If we don't know what he is doing it is hard to know why he did it. It is possible to argue for a thing that he wants to achieve and his motives. The text provides lots of material for a plan, but any plan can be contradicted by other material in the text. A production could use emphasis to create a plan but that would sacrifice other parts. There are more plans than we need in a play. Disloyal servant who is performatively loyal whose actions lead to destruction. What motive is unsettleable. 
            Iago says when he's alone in 1.3.375 “thus do I make a fool my purse.” His motive is to get money from Rodorigo. His main thing in the first act is performing for Rodorigo in order to keep him “ever” on the hook . Then he changes to say “I hate the Moor.” That's essential. Maybe it's about Moorishness. He doesn't need to tell us. It's not essential but practical. Maybe he hates him anyway. Othello might be sleeping with Iago's wife. It's difficult to see if the hatred is caused by gossip. If we view a soldiers camp of the time it is not implausible that a general would sleep with the ensign's wife. It could happen. He says I will treat it like my suspicion is true. Maybe he hates him for that. He thinks I'm loyal so I can fool him. 
            He's jealous of Cassio for professional reasons. He wants his place as lieutenant. Double knavery with two plans, Cassio's place and Othello and Amelia. Ambiguous pronouns about him being too familiar with his wife. Cassio is too familiar but the suggestion is that Shakespeare will make Othello think that Othello is too familiar with Othello's wife. It is unclear what he is thinking. He's going to make Othello jealous of Cassio but that is not obvious yet. Who is honest? Cassio? It is very difficult to follow. A good actor can slow it down but would have to fight with the text to mould it to something clear. The course is not clear. Is Iago just mischievous? It is engendered. What is? He's thinking out loud. There is a possibility he says that he's got it but we don't know and he doesn't put it together. He provides more uncertainty. He loves Desdemona too but not absolutely. Do you or not? Do you Love love her or just love her? Not lust but sort of lust. Revenge on Cassio and Othello over Cassio. He's upset about adultery now. My goal or motive is my lust for Desdemona. He would sleep with her but doesn't. His plans are uncertain to the point of chaos. 
            The actor in Shakespeare's time who played Othello was Richard Burbage. He was the leading actor of Shakespeare's company. The professor shows his picture. He played Hamlet and King Lear as well. He probably darkened his face. There were people of colour in England at the time but not many. It was not a homogeneous society and not diverse. Female characters were played by men made up with prosthetics. Also any ethnic character was portrayed with costume as well. Skin darkening has a long history. It was pervasive in the English Renaissance. 


            Early in Shakespeare's career he's interested in a Moor character. The professor shows a drawing from the time of several figures on the one on the far right is very dark. He is Aaron in Titus Andronicus and he is like Iago. Because English Renaissance drama was interested in tales of violence, travel, warfare, historical events of great sweep, and spectacle. Representations of things outside the audience's experience. They looked for spectacular stories of people of diverse nations such as Moors and exotic spectacles because the audience liked it. Before Shakespeare and after there were plays with Moors.


            The meaning is not consistent as to what a “Moor” was. There was darkness of skin and consistently a white actor would darken his skin and put on an exotic costume. This was attractive. It was external to the world of the play but in the middle of the action. The tradition on this was that this was a probable outsider brought into the play. But they usually made them villains or put them in small roles. Othello is the only play with a Moor as a main character. Later in the period the play Fatal Contract had a Moor eunuch as the central character wreaking havoc, but it was revealed later to be a white woman in disguise. Innovative and crazy. Shakespeare tended to try to make things difficult for himself and he was interested in challenging himself to bring a Moor into the centre. Not just an attractive villain but a tragic character in an impossible position. How much sympathy can there be for this character? An essential and performative difference. The Merchant of Venice had a Jewish main character and there was also The Jew of Malta by Marlow. The rhetoric of the Maltese world is that the characters are as bad as possible. One hates everyone and enjoys hating the Jew a little more. Shakespeare makes Shylock potentially sympathetic although unattractive. He had the ambition and innovativeness to challenge the bounds of his medium. Characters different from normal that might be excluded from the audience's experience. 
            Internet Shakespeare Editions has a pretty good Othello section. Othello is based on an Italian novella from 1565 called Cinthio's Tale. It's the same story with changes. They drew plays from extant written materials that were not necessarily popular. “The Moor” comes from this but Shakespeare gives him a name. “Moor” was a position. Cinthio is taking what “Moor” means for granted. 
            The definition of Moor has a range of meanings. One can access the OED from the University of Toronto website. Mauritania corresponded to Morocco. Later the word was associated with Muslims of northwest Africa such as the Berbers. Changing meaning. It was associated with skin colour. A kind of Egyptian. Separated from colour of skin. Religious term. Englishman turned Moor by conversion. There is a range of meanings but it's always about difference. Context has to do with understanding.

            I weighed 88 kilos before lunch. I think it was 87.8 before breakfast but I forgot to write it down. I had saltines with five year old cheddar and a glass of fruit punch. 
            I worked on editing my lecture notes. 
            I took a bike ride in the cloudy and dingy afternoon. It looked like it could rain at any time but it didn't. I rode to Yonge and Bloor and then south. I turned my flashers on at Queen. I took King home as I probably will for the next few weeks. There are some nice old buildings on King but they are not played up as well as on Queen. King Street has kind of been undesigned in a way that does not enhance its finer old features. I weighed 86.8 kilos when I got home at 17:00. 
            I finished editing my lecture notes at 19:00. 
            I finished reading "The Ballad of the Sad Cafe” by Carson McCullers. It's a bizarre but well written story kind of in that southern grotesque style of Flannery O'Connor but more absurd. Miss Amelia is the richest woman in town. She's big, tough and smart and can do anything. She runs a still that makes the finest whisky and she also serves as an amateur doctor who is more successful than the local doctor and invents her own medicines. She was married once for ten days to a man named Macy who was sent to the penitentiary. She is a loner but one day a little hunchback who claims to be her cousin arrives in town. He moves in with her and they are inseparable. Under his influence she turns the downstairs part of her house into a cafe that becomes the most popular meeting place in town. After a few years, her ex-husband is released from prison and starts coming around. The hunchback begins to follow him around admiringly even though he treats him cruelly. Eventually Macy moves into Amelia's house and they are building up to a showdown. On the day of the fight everyone is there to watch. Miss Amelia has slightly the worst of it until the fistfight turns into a wrestling match and she is winning. She has Macy on his back with her hands around his neck when the hunchback jumps her and helps Macy win. That changes everything. The hunchback and Macy move away together, destroying her still on the way and Amelia becomes weak and old. The cafe closes down. 
            I started reading the novel Salvage the Bones by Jesmyn Ward but I don't have time to read the whole thing because my essay is due in nine days. I just want to get a feel for all the material before I decide what to write my paper on. I'm trying to read it by just reading the first sentence of each paragraph and I've gotten through the first two but can't make much sense of it. A dog named China has puppies and a woman in the family gets pregnant. 
            I cooked spiral macaroni with Alfredo sauce and extra old cheddar and had it with a beer while watching an episode of Gomer Pyle. 
            In this story Gomer's fellow Marine Ken is a nervous wreck because his wife Rosemary is soon having a baby. Gomer and Ken sneak into Sergeant Carter's quarters to use the phone to call to see if she's all right but Carter catches them. The next day he punishes them by making them change the light bulbs on the poles around the base but Gomer falls on top of Ken and breaks his leg. Gomer wants to go to stay with Rosemary to make sure he can help when she goes into labour. Carter gives him a pass but he feels guilty about maybe inadvertently causing Ken's injury and so he drives them even though he's supposed to meet Bunny at an important event for her job. Carter gets involved when Rosemary goes into labour and although he keeps intending on getting away to Bunny he can't help staying to see the baby. Carter misses Bunny's event but she understands. 
            Rosemary was played by Jackie Joseph who played Audrey in the original “Little Shop of Horrors.” 
 

            The nurse was played by Thordis Brandt, who was born in Germany and raised in Canada where she earned a nursing degree in Vancouver. She moved to California to pursue acting but kept nursing on the side and became known as the actor's nurse. She worked as a nurse advisor on “Ben Casey” and sometimes appeared on the show. When she retired from acting she continued nursing. She had a relationship for several years with James Arness of “Gunsmoke.” She has gained cult status for her roles in “Dragnet 1966”, “The Witchmaker” and “Up Your Teddy Bear.” 









                        



            Ken was played by Warren Berlinger.



November 18, 1991: Nancy and I had an appointment with counsellors who used past lives in their work, so I didn't have my hopes up


Thirty years ago today

            On Monday I called a few moving companies. Mark the Mover took my number. I went over and applied at Tippet and Richardson. 
            I called about food banks and found that there was one at Main and Kingston Road. 
            I tried to make pancakes without milk or eggs but just flour and water, so it wasn't very appetizing.
            Nancy called about us going to see the “counselors” in Kitchener. We had an appointment for Wednesday but she said they believed in past lives and applied that to their counseling, so I didn't think it sounded very hopeful. 
            She called again about her friend Brenka's brother, asking if he could go to jail for having a $1000 bill. I didn't think so. 
            I was getting tired easily and I thought it was because of my diet. 
            I put away all of the stuff that Nancy'd brought and most of my things were now back at my place.

Wednesday, 17 November 2021

White Trash


            On Tuesday morning I memorized the the second chorus of "Arthur, où t'as mis le corps" (Arthur, Where'd You Put The Corpse?) by Boris Vian. Just six verses to go. 
            I finished working out the chords for “Belinda” by Serge Gainsbourg. I ran through it in French and English, made a chord adjustment, and then uploaded it to Christian's Translations.
            I weighed 88.2 kilos before breakfast. 
            I had time to eat two oranges and have a few sips of coffee before leaving for the US Lit lecture. I bundled up and wore two scarves as well as my winter gloves, though I don't know if I really needed them. 

            Lecture: 
            We are headed into the home stretch. Essay topics are up and she hopes some have started. It's due on November 26. Our exam is on December 15 from 19:00 to 21:00. Go to tutorials to prepare for the exam. Tutorials are a significant chunk of our marks. 
            William Faulkner's As I Lay Dying was published in 1930. It's good if it's difficult. He's a Modernist writer. It's an opportunity that it's difficult. We are taking a leap as the next cluster of texts is from the southern US. It's an aesthetic leap. 
            In Modernism, in the US context, Faulkner is juxtaposed with Hemingway as the other end of two poles. The opposition is that Hemingway is minimal with his tip of the iceberg effect while Faulkner is expansive and ornate. Modernism is closely linked but not necessarily sympathetic with modernization, cities, industry, secularism and mass production. Modernist texts tend to bear traces of these processes but are often critical of them. In terms of literary history and form, Modernism is a departure from Realism. It is associated with fragmented narratives, psychology, and internality over plot and events; stream of consciousness, and rhetorical complexity. Modernism is a more real realism that reminds us that realism is not reality. It is linked to the conventional passing of Realism. 
            Faulker was born in Mississippi. Connect this with Jesmyn Ward. He was the oldest of four. His family name was “Falkner” but he added a “U”. Hawthorne added a “w.” One can read endlessly about these changes. His sweetheart married someone else and he joined the Royal Canadian Air Force because he was underweight and under height for the US. He had to pretend that he was British to get in. He was discharged but wore his uniform back in Mississippi while telling fake war stories. He married the sweetheart who'd previously left him. 
            His first famous novel was The Sound and the Fury. He describes it as having been written without plan or design in a state of ecstasy. As I Lay Dying was written the same year while he was a nighttime supervisor at a U of Mississippi power plant. He wrote it in six weeks and sent it without change. He knew the last words before he started. It has a punch line. He is associated with telling tall tales. Is his account of how he wrote it accurate? His version is not entirely true but more than one expects. 
            He invented a fictional county to be the universe or world of his fiction. Yoknapatawpha County. 
            He also spent much of WWII in Hollywood working on classic films as a writer. His two most famous films are “The Big Sleep” and “Mildred Pierce.” The Coen brothers have a sketch of Faulker in “Barton Fink.” 
            His works went out of print but returned with the Portable Faulkner in 1946. He won the Nobel Prize in 1950. 
            There are snippets from the reviews of As I Lay Dying:
            “Faulkner and Formal Innovation. The method Mr. Faulkner used in his last novel, The Sound and The Fury, is here greatly modified, so that though something of that extraordinary madness hangs like a red mist over it, the lines of demarcation are mercifully clear. This is a great concession and a boon to people who are ready to weep with exhaustion from the effort to interpret and absorb what might be called a sort of photographic mysticism. But even so it cannot be said that for such readers As I Lay Dying will prove much of a picnic.” - Margaret Cheney Dawson 
            “Faulkner and class: The Sound and the Fury dealt with the tragedy of the disintegration of an aristocratic family. As I Lay Dying deals with the tragedy of death among white trash. The tragedy of character is deeper than the tragedy of death, for death is a commonplace, whether among white trash or cavaliers. It stands to reason that The Sound and The Fury with its strange reverberations of madness should be a more striking novel than As I Lay Dying in which the action is sordidly matter-of-fact. As I Lay Dying is a horrible book. It will scandalize the squeamish. But it is an admirable book, one to delight those who respect life well interpreted in fine fiction without attempting to dictate what subjects an author shall choose.” - Julia K. W. Baker 
            Unlike The Sound and the Fury, As I Lay Dying is divided into short sections with characters' names as lines of demarcation that are helpful to the reader. But it doesn't always seem as if the section could be from the consciousness of that character. This is problematic for some readers. It gives a sense that it's strange and hard. Photographic mysticism. 
            Class specifics. A vocabulary such as a Bundren never dreamed of to render thought. Horrible but admirable. Some say the term “white trash” is not a good choice. They are low characters. There was a classroom agreement at a university for a class code that no one can refer to anyone as “trash.” Why is it important to say that? Who are the proper subjects of literature and how? People say Faulkner was morbid, cruel, and showed an affinity for defective mentality. There was a formal difficulty with Faulkner, his subjects, and his characters. But after Faulkner won the Nobel he was now representative of US literature.
            “Vardaman is a gibbering half-wit who believes that his mother is a fish.” -Clifton P. Fadiman
            “The Canonical Faulkner: Faulkner has daringly mingled the grotesque and the heroic, the comic and the pathetic, pity and terror, creating a complexity of tone that has proved difficult for some readers to cope with.” - Cleanth Brooks 
            In terms of genre, Faulkner is referred to as Southern Gothic. The gesture to Gothic is limited in use or coherence. Southern Gothic used to be derogatory. 
            “The Case Against Southern Gothic: The South has always been a section apart from the rest of the United States . . . Economically and in other ways it has been used as a sort of colony to the rest of the nation. The poverty is unlike anything known in other parts of this country. . . The South is the only part of the nation having a definite peasant class.” - Carson McCullers, “The Russian Realists and Southern Literature” (1941) 
            The Bundrens are a peasant class. Rural poverty in As I Lay Dying. They are farmers, maybe tenant farmers or maybe sharecroppers. How much do they own? Do they own land, property, or their mule? They are alienated from town life. Town is modern and seductive. We can read and think about race. The racial difference between this and his other novel is not obvious. White trash is necessarily racialized. The contrast with The Sound and the Fury, which has to do with a white family and their black servants. 
            The South is haunted by the Civil War. It has been left behind by modernity. African Americans are leaving in the great migration from southern rural to northern urban. There is a timelessness to the novel but it can't be separated from their being left out of history. One can read the novel closely and pick out historical references that situate it for you. When we see that Darl fought in WWI we see him closed in, limited, and set apart but now placed in history. 
            “Why drag about the monstrous corpse of your memory, lest you contradict somewhat you have stated in this or that public place? Suppose you should contradict yourself; what then?” -Emerson, “Self-Reliance” 
            The Bundrens are dragging a corpse. It provides the plot. The symbol of the corpse. Does the personal history of characters represent the south? History? Emerson says don't think about the corpse. Faulkner says think about it. 
            Integrity vs. fragmentation, dissolution. What holds it together in terms of bodies, consciousness, and literary form? Mourning. Southern works are consumed by loss. Is that a distinct quality of southern literature or is all literature about loss and mourning? One hopes English studies include philosophy. Darl's passage is conscious being. Melancholy philosophy on the concept of mourning. He's conceptualizing absence and death and other things. There is a crucial opposition between Darl and Jewel. He imagines that Jewel has no consciousness. Jewel is not speculating so he can be. He later says Jewel is made of wood with no interior. 
            Relationship between object and shaping consciousness. Jewel, Addie and himself are configured. Think of the different characters in the novel on a journey in which we learn about them. Certain objects are important in the story. Who has an object and who doesn't substitute it for the body of the mother? We start out as an undifferent unity to become fragments but haunted by loss. Vardaman had a fish and wants a train. Dewey asks wouldn't you rather have bananas? What is Dewey's object? Jewel has a horse, Cash has his tools, Anse has teeth, and a new wife. Addie's object is Jewel. Darl has none but he has most of the language and thought. 
            We took a break. 
            I told the professor that Darl's thoughts about being sound like a Beat poem although it's way too early. Hipsters and jive talk are closer but still a few years away. 
            “The fact that in As I Lay Dying the characters think in words they cannot know shows that in “reality” they know things that they cannot say.” - Dorothy Hale
            Anse has an immediate comic presence and a comic distance. He has laziness. He has the desire to not be beholden to anyone while at the same time taking advantage of everyone. His relation to Addie is one of will and desire. He has a funny relationship with tense. After Addie is dead he speaks about what she wants in the present tense. It is clever of Faulkner and it says something about the ungraspable temper of death. He wants teeth. Part of the dark humour is that the other wife is the same as Addie. It ends with a joke. Observation on the relationship between patriarchy and language and loss. Mrs. Bundren represents Mrs. Bundren. 
            Cash is the oldest. He's a carpenter and makes his mother's coffin while she is alive, holding up the boards for her to see and approve. He has come from her womb and building her coffin is a fair exchange. His list makes no sense as a numbered list but it shows his mind and is important visually. It is the opposite of Vardaman's fish. Faulkner uses visual aspects of language to talk of consciousness. Cash is simple, careful, rule-bound, fair, not philosophical, stoic. He is comically in pain but it don't bother him. When you think of the characters think how they fit together as a family. The pieces fit and fall apart. Darl has the first section and Cash has the last. The family knows his tools are his object. He also articulates important things. She asked for our thoughts on why Cash defends Darl. 
            I say that for Cash everybody has been built just like he builds things. People are objects so they can't have insanity unless we put it into them. 
            Darl is a problem. He's able to gesture toward relationality. It's how we look at people. Cash questions philosophy and morality. He misses Darl. How much responsibility goes into characterization. The extent to which characters have been shaped by loss of mother or wife. Or if something else is going on. Dewey's pregnancy ties her to her mother. She is raped by a pharmacist. She modulates into poetic language not attributed to her. She has irregular diction and grammar. Speculations of character but also how consciousness works. Not just bad grammar. She and Darl have a wordless communication and he knows her secrets. Incestuous knowing. People are tubs of guts. She is from a name equated with nature and animals. This is problematic because it suggests men are less natural and subject to decay. Females take on the burden of death while men are conscious. 
            I said she stands apart from her mother in that she would choose to have an abortion. 
            She is thinking of the mysticism of pregnancy and how one is not oneself. The doctor has a fat belly. Why does he not have room for a baby? What does it mean to be an individual? Pregnancy is messed up for individuals. Dewey is like Macbeth after Lady Macbeth dies. 
            Jewel. How many sections do characters have? Jewel has one. He would save mom. They die together. He is pissed off at Cash. Jewel saves his mother's corpse twice from water and fire. Darl wants to destroy her corpse. Jewel gives up his horse. Compare Jewel and Pearl from The Scarlet Letter. They are not alike but of similar significance to their mothers, and illegitimate with a minister as the father. Addie's love for Jewel is different from what she has for others. 
            Q. Mr. Faulkner, in As I Lay Dying, did Jewel purchase the horse as a substitute for his mother?
            A. Well, now that’s something for the psychologist. He bought that horse because he wanted that horse. 
            Q. Did you consciously or unconsciously parallel As I Lay Dying with The Scarlet Letter?
            A. No, a writer don’t have to consciously parallel because he robs and steals from everything he ever wrote or read or saw. 
            Darl has 30% of the text. He is an author surrogate. He narrates events when he is not there. He knows secrets. He knows Jewel is illegitimate. He has an affinity with Vardaman. His special knowledge makes him quasi authorial. He is mad and in the third person he dissolves into the book. Vardaman has a distinct way of putting the world together. He has a fish he aims to show his dying ma as an offering. She will be impressed. His mom becomes confused with the fish. He substitutes her. After Addie is in the box Vardaman bores holes and damages her face. Addie is juxtaposed with the minister's section. This is a parallel to The Scarlet Letter. He wants to confess but relieved when he doesn't have to. 
           Addie is dead but speaks. She is missing and not missing, absent and present. Addie is similar to the sister in The Sound and the Fury. Addie's theory of language and love, about language and words. They are no good if the forms fail. Only language because of loss. Look at her account of language.
            “What the book poignantly exposes is the precarious nature of ritual expression, particularly that of funeral rituals, in which an absurd possibility—that the corpse of the person nonetheless is the person—is maintained not because anyone believes it but because no one can immediately, emotionally deny it. The trauma of grief, in which death most clearly is a function of other minds, makes the irrational conventional.” --------Eric Sundquist

            I told the professor that it seemed like a Dixie-centric course with most of the authors being from the southern US. I added that was ironic since the south isn't really part of the United States in a spiritual sense. She pointed out that we had a lot of authors from New England early on and I realized that was true. I said that still there sure have been a lot of great writers from the south. She agreed. I wondered if it had something to do with having an upper-class culture in poverty. We talked about regions that produce authors and she said the south is one of them. She couldn't think of much from the Midwest but I suggested Bob Dylan. I said the Canadian Prairies seem to have produced some good authors. She said her favourite Canadian writer is Alice Munro, who of course is from Ontario. I told her about my favourite quote from Alice Munro, which is that she never read a novel that couldn't have made a better short story. She said her later stories are as complex as novels. 
            I rode to Yonge and Bloor and then south to King and all the way to Dunn before going back up to Queen. King Street is pretty boring all the way and always has been.
            I weighed 86.9 kilos before lunch. 
            I weighed 87.3 kilos at 18:45. 
            I had a potato with the rest of my gravy and a chicken breast while watching an episode of Gomer Pyle. 
            In this story Gomer tells Sergeant Carter that he needs a week's leave to go back to Mayberry and buy a filling station with his cousin Goober. When Carter learns that Gomer plans on leaving the Marines if the deal goes through, he falls all over himself to help him. Gomer takes out all of his savings, which amount to $1600 and suddenly all of the other Marines are trying to get some of it. Carter sweeps in to protect his chance to be free of Gomer. At the bus station Carter has to steer Gomer clear of thieves and scam artists. Carter escorts Gomer onto the bus and tells him he can only trust the sweet little old lady and her son behind him, not knowing that she is a master pickpocket who has almost successfully lifted Gomer's money. Carter decides to travel with Gomer and takes his wallet to place the money under his protection. But the old lady effortlessly picks Carter's pocket. Gomer and Carter ride the bus to the next town where Gomer convinces Carter he'll be okay now. But Carter discovers Gomer's wallet missing. He realizes it was the old lady and they take a cab back to the previous stop. The cabbie is on his way to pick up an old lady and her son to take them to Las Vegas. Carter and Gomer catch them and call the cops. Carter sends Gomer onto the bus and thinks he'll be free of him soon, but Gomer returns to the base after realizing how well protected he is by Carter and so he decides to stay in the Marines. 
            After dinner I went to make coffee and saw a mouse on my stove. It ran to the counter and behind my granite cutting board that leans against the wall. I reacted instinctively and pushed the cutting board flat against the wall. When I pulled it away it looked like I had severely injured the mouse. I felt bad because I hadn't consciously intended to hurt it. I picked it up and put it outside. There are probably more living here although I've never seen two together. 
            It took me until 22:30 to edit my lecture notes.

November 17, 1991: Nancy returned a cockroach to La Maison Croissant


Thirty years ago today

            Nancy showed up with the baby just after 11:00 but just before our daughter's birth time for the celebration of her half birthday. I spent about an hour with her at my place before we headed out to the Santa Clause Parade. Yonge and Queen was super crowded but we found a spot by New City Hall.
            Afterward, we walked up to Bloor where Nancy returned a cockroach to La Maison Croissant and then we took the subway to Pape where she got roast potatoes. We took the Pape bus to Queen and the streetcar to my place. 
           I gave my daughter a bath and we put her in the floater. She loved it. I fed her rice.