Douglas Fowley

            On Tuesday morning I was sniffling, I had phlegm in my throat and itchy eyes. It felt like it might be from pollen or maybe I was coming down with a cold. Itchy eyes are not a symptom of covid.

            I memorized the first verse and the chorus of ""Pas long feu" (Not For Long) by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            I weighed 89.5 kilos before breakfast. 

            Just before 11:45 I walked over to the Vina Pharmacy for my second covid shot. I got there five minutes early and so I waited three minutes before going in. The woman behind the counter took my health card and didn't give it back until it was time for me to leave. I'm not sure what the purpose of holding the card is. Maybe it's in case one collapses they won't have to dig in my bag or pockets for the card. I chose to stand while waiting the ten minutes for my shot because I didn't want to take another bedbug home. One guy about my age sat down on the couch and since he looked at me I took the opportunity to warn him that the last time I sat there I took home a bedbug. He thanked me, got up and sat on one of the plastic chairs. Then he thanked me again. I told him that I was lucky because the bug was a mail. He said bedbugs are asexual but I informed him that they aren't and that only females lay eggs. He thought females could lay eggs without a male but I told him they can't. 

            A pretty young toothpick named Lizzy Miller called me into the little room. She let me know I was going to be getting Moderna and she smiled when I corrected her that it's actually Postmoderna and predicted that it would make me feel more ironic and metatextual. The shot hurt even less than the first time but I felt incomplete because she didn't put a bandaid on my arm. There didn't seem to be any reason to anyway since there was no blood. I said it doesn't hurt as much as giving blood samples and guessed that it's because once the needle passes the skin there are no sensory nerves. She warned me that my arm might be sore for a couple of days and I said last time it was only a day. She said that many people report that the second shot has a stronger effect and there can even be a fever. I waited afterwards like last time for my health card and my vaccination receipt, although I don't think they took my health card last time. 

           Two more people sat down on the couches but I didn't warn them about the possibility of bed bugs, I guess because they didn't engage with me and I felt uncomfortable with the idea of getting their attention to warn them. Hopefully those couches have been treated since I warned the management about the bedbug I found last month. The guy I'd warned received a big handful of pills and a glass of water from the counter, then ate them all. He asked about his second covid shot and the woman offered to book his right then. I guess Vina has a lot of Moderna right now. 

            When I got home I had time to do the dishes. 

            Perhaps because of the shot I felt very tired before lunch. I weighed 88.7 kilos. I had kettle chips, salsa and yogourt with a glass of orange juice. 

            I took a bike ride to Yonge and Bloor and I weighed 88.7 kilos when I got back. So far my arm only felt a little sore. When I got home I saw that Windows 10 had successfully done some updates, although I'd been avoiding it whenever I was given the option of "Update and shut down" because in the past it has caused the hassle of Windows freezing on the restart. But this time it went ahead by itself and everything was fine. 

            I sent Albert Moritz the first draft of my cover letter to Exile Editions. I'm pretty sure he'll say it's too long but I thought I'd put in everything that I thought was relevant and then have him tell me what to ease back on. 

            I worked on my poem series "My Blood In A Bug." 

            I rubbed three chicken legs with butter, salt and chili powder and put them in the oven. I used butter because I forgot to buy olive oil the last time I went to the supermarket. 

            I sewed another two sections of the leather covering for my Roland amp towards its role in the video I'm making for my song "Instructions For Electroshock Therapy." The part of the top right front that folds over to the right side of the amp has been secured there. I started sewing the left side of that piece to another piece at the top, right front. 

            The gravy I made yesterday came out too thick and so I added some of the water from under the chicken legs to thin it down. I had a potato with gravy and a chicken leg for dinner while watching two episodes of Mayberry RFD. 

            In the first story Emmett breaks his arm when he falls down Goober's grease pit while trying to catch a football. With his arm in a cast he can't do the repairs in his fix-it shop and so he puts an ad in the paper looking for an assistant. A high school science student named Ernie is the only one that answers the ad and Emmett tells him he's looking for someone older. But before leaving Ernie notices a hum in Emmett's radio and Emmett says some things just can't be fixed. Ernie asks if he's tried reversing the polarity, then Ernie pulls the plug and turns it around in the outlet, which stops the hum. Emmett hires Ernie and he turns out to have solutions to problems Emmett doesn't have the know how to understand. Business is booming and people are secretly hoping Emmett doesn't recover soon. Emmett decides he can't keep up with young people and decides to leave Mayberry. Sam tells him that he has to constantly study up on new farming methods to keep up with today's kids. In the end we see Emmett taking Ernie's science class and learning as well as the other students. 

            In the second story Sam's well is running dry and so he hires a geologist to find a new well on his farm. Meanwhile an old douser named Judson, who finds water with a divining rod tells Sam he can find water. Harris the geologist drills at $300 a hole but comes up dry. Judson uses his stick and claims to have found the spot and will tell Sam where it is for $50. The geologists second hole also comes up dry. Judson tells Harris he knows where there is water six meters down. Harris says there is no water six meters down in the whole county and Judson bets him $10 there is. Then Judson says the spot is right where Harris's drill has already dug but he just has to dig another six meters. Sure enough water is found.

            Judson was played by Douglas Fowley, who appeared in over 240 films. He co-starred in "Singin In The Rain". He played Doc Holliday in the TV series "The Life and Legend of Wyatt Earp". He played Grandpa Hanks in the series "Pistols and Petticoats". He also co-starred in the short lived series "Detective School." He's the father of Kim Fowley, successful music producer and former manager of The Runaways.