Julie Gregg

            On Thursday morning I memorized the first verse of “On fait des rêves” (We Keep Dreaming) by Boris Vian. That verse is repeated later and so that’s about a quarter of the song. This won’t take nearly as long to learn as the last one. 

            I finished memorizing “Quoi toi moi t’aimer tu rêves” (What You Love of Me is what You Dream) by Serge Gainsbourg. I looked for the chords but of course no one has posted them. I made a few tentative stabs at working them out in patches around the middle of the song while listening to the extract on Apple Music. 

            I played my Kramer electric guitar during song practice for the first of four sessions. My amp is still in the shop and so I’m still playing through my audio interface. I opened up Guitar Rig to try it out but there’s too much distortion and I couldn’t figure out how to get a clean sound. I turned it off and unlike Amplitube there is no residual carrying over of the effects and it returns to just the sound of the guitar through the Scarlett Interface. I like distortion and reverb in places but it’s easier to control it on my amp. 

            I weighed 87.8 kilos before breakfast, which is the heaviest I’ve been in the morning since May 6. 

            I thought about doing some more sanding of my bathroom ceiling today. But Thursday is a day I shave and shower so since I didn’t want to shower twice I would have had to sand before showering, which would have been awkward. 

            I tried to track down some photos of my daughter from around her third birthday. There was a party that Mary Milne had for her at Fat Albert’s but I only found one photo and no negatives so it probably wasn’t taken by me. I no longer have a scanner so I tried to see how well my new camera could copy it. Just hand-held it didn’t work but using the tripod I got a passable copy. 

            I weighed 87.5 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and stopped at Freshco on my way home where I bought five bags of green grapes, a pack of raspberries, a pack of blueberries, bananas, a pack of five-year-old cheddar, two hot honey sausages, Grizzly Claw coffee, sea salt, and brass scouring pads. 

            I weighed 87.8 kilos at 18:00. That’s the most I’ve tipped the scales in the evening since March 1. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 18:55. 

            I compared the video of my September 11 song practice performance of “Kenya” with that of August 16. September 11 is better I think, plus it’s already synchronized in Movie Maker. I compared September 13 to September 11 and I think September 11 is slightly better. So the September 11 take is the acoustic version of “Kenya” that I’ll upload to YouTube. Next I have to compare the electric takes of “La bas c’est natural”. I compared August 17 and 19. August 19 is a little better, plus it’s already in Movie Maker. I compared August 29 to August 19 but couldn’t come to a decision. I’ll listen again tomorrow. 

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “Angeline” I synchronized the concert video with the studio audio for the part where I sing, “I feel I’m falling…”. But then it goes out of synch again for “… through the soundtrack of your dream”. So I added another clip of Mickey Dolenz falling in the movie Head. Now the video is behind and so I’ll need to cut more than thirty seconds off the video to line it up with the audio when I sing, “… and since I can’t see the bottom I’ll resign myself to falling”.

            I made a new batch of gravy with last night’s chicken drippings and had some with a potato and a chicken leg while watching season 2, episodes 27 and 28 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Darrin comes home from work to find that a leprechaun named Brian is a guest in his house. He takes Samantha aside and tells her he’s fed up with her magical relatives popping in. Samantha reveals to him that Brian is not her relative but his. Brian explains that he has come to the United States to retrieve his last pot of gold. He had hidden it behind one of the stones of a fireplace in a cottage. But a wealthy North American had bought the cottage, then disassembled the fireplace and had it shipped back to the US. Without his pot of gold Brian has no magical powers. The rich man is James Dennis Robinson and he lives near Samantha and Darrin. Darrin finds out that Robinson owns Westchester Consolidated Mills, an account that Darrin’s employer, McMann and Tate has been trying to win for years. Brian climbs through a window in Robinson’s home but is confronted by Robinson’s mastiff. Brian is arrested and uses his one phone call to telephone Samantha. Darrin gives her permission to spring him from jail but no more magic after that. Samantha frees Brian and then goes against Darrin’s wishes to help Brian retrieve his gold. They appear in the Robinson home and Samantha turns the two mastiffs into chihuahuas. Brian removes the stone but discovers that his gold has been removed. Then Robinson enters the room with a gun in one hand and the pot of gold in the other. Samantha prevents Robinson from reaching his phone so he can call the police. Brian reveals that he’s a leprechaun and Robinson believes him because he’s Irish too. Robinson gives Brian his gold but then grabs him because the rules are that if one captures a leprechaun he has to grant him one wish. His wish is to use Brian in an advertizing campaign for his company. Brian agrees but says he wants McMann and Tate to handle the account and for Darrin to be in charge of the campaign. Robinson agrees. 

            In the second story Samantha has to accompany Darrin to a cocktail party for a very important client named Kabaker. At the party Samantha meets Kabaker’s snobbish daughter who resents having to mingle outside of her class. Miss Kabaker is extremely insulting towards Samantha about her dress, her nose, and her figure. Samantha has all she can stand and so she sends a creamy pastry flying into Miss Kabaker’s face. Larry is barely able to save the Kabaker account but the next day he has some nasty things to say about Samantha to Darrin. Darrin in turn insults Larry’s wife Louise. They decide to not be friends anymore and Darrin then quits. The Ames Advertizing Agency has been courting Darrin for years and so he goes for an interview. Meanwhile Samantha and Louise discuss how stupidly their husbands are behaving and plot to make themselves a common enemy so their boys will become friends again. First of all Samantha uses witchcraft to jinx Darren’s interview. She causes him to have infantile impulses such as sucking his thumb and so he is not hired. Darrin knows Samantha is behind it and so he comes home angry. She is defiant and tells him she’s trying to stop him from making the biggest mistake of his life. She tells Darrin he should crawl to Larry and beg forgiveness because without Larry he’d be nothing. Darrin storms out and says he’ll spend the night at the club. Meanwhile Louise has a similar argument with Larry that also ends in him leaving for the club. Samantha uses magic to cause Darrin and Larry to end up in the same room but they don’t realize it until they are in bed together. They realize they have been behaving like numbskulls and make up. 

            Miss Kabaker was played by Julie Gregg, who attended university on a music scholarship. Her acting mentor was Jackie Cooper. Her first TV role was on McHale’s Navy. She played Finella in two episodes of Batman. She co-starred in the detective series Banyon. She was nominated for a Tony Award for her performance on Broadway in The Happy Time. Her first credited film role was in From Hell to Borneo. She co-starred in Mobile One. She appeared in The Godfather and co-starred in The Godfather Saga mini series. She played Antonia in Man of La Mancha and did her own singing.

May 17, 1994: It was my daughter's third birthday

Thirty years ago today

            Tuesday was my daughter’s third birthday but before we could celebrate I had to take her to work with me at Northern Secondary School. Afterwards we just enjoyed ourselves and I let her wander wherever she wanted to go. We hung around Eglinton just like last year and she ate a lot of junk food. We walked up Mount Pleasant a long way and then crossed over to Yonge where we caught the subway. When we got back to the Beaches we wandered around some more and had ice cream twice. We went to the playground for a while and wandered and played until we finally ended up at home. I didn’t go to the Gladstone to host my Orgasmic Alphabet Orgy open stage in the Art Bar. My co-host Mary Milne was pissed off.

Patty Regan

            On Wednesday morning I woke up to pee at around 3:30 and I was bleeding from the outside of my ear. I must have cut myself shaving on Monday and scratched the wound in my sleep. It’s happened before. 

            I did another search for the lyrics of six songs by Boris Vian that I’d made a first attempt to track down a year or so ago. There are a lot of Vian songs that have been lost and these songs: “Je crois entendre”, “Je l'ai connu”, “Je m'en fou”, “Madame Lala”, “Ombres de l'amour”, “On était tous à table” are among them. I did learn though that “Madame Lala” was the pet name Vian had for his daughter Carole. But I did find YouTube recordings of his 1950 song “On fait des rêves” (We Keep Dreaming), and so I’ll start learning that tomorrow.

            I memorized the fourth verse of “Quoi toi moi t’aimer tu rêves” (What You Love of Me is what You Dream) by Serge Gainsbourg. I almost conquered the last verse and so I should have no problem nailing it down on Thursday. 

            I played my Martin acoustic guitar during song practice for the second of two sessions. Tomorrow I’ll begin a four session stretch of playing my Kramer electric. It’s been a week since I took my amplifier to L’il Demon to be repaired. If I don’t get an email today I’ll play it through my audio interface like last time. 

            I weighed 87.5 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I sanded another section of my bathroom ceiling. All that’s left is the area above the inside half of the tub. That should take about two more sessions and then I’ll take a break to shop for a guitar effects pedal. 

            I weighed 87.7 kilos before lunch, which is the heaviest I’ve been at midday in a week. I had saltines with five-year-old cheddar and a glass of iced tea. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and on the way back I stopped at Freshco where I bought three bags of green grapes. 

            I weighed 87.2 kilos at 17:30. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 18:30. 

            I compared the song practice videos of my August 10 and 12 performances of “Kenya”. Neither day had great light but it was better on the 10th. I compared August 16 to August 10 and found that August 16 is far better, except for traffic noise. The traffic noise isn’t picked up as much in the Audacity recording as it is by the camera microphone and so August 16 wins this round. I compared August 22 with August 16 and I think August 22 is quieter in terms of traffic noise but August 16 has better light, so I’ll stay with August 16 for now. I compared August 26 with August 16 and they are close to equal but I still like the look of August 16 a little better. I compared August 28 to August 16 and I still prefer the look of August 16. I compared September 1 to August 16 and I still think the expression, the look and the ending of August 16 give it the edge. There are two takes of the acoustic version of “Kenya” left to compare. 

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “Angeline” I synchronized the concert video with the studio audio at the beginning of the second chorus when I sing “Angeline…”. But after that the video is ahead of the audio for the line, “I feel I’m falling through the soundtrack of your dream” and so I had to push it back by adding little clips of Mickey Dolenz falling from the Golden Gate Bridge in the movie Head. The audio was still a little behind when I stopped for the night. I should have them lined up tomorrow. 

            I made pizza on naan with Basilica sauce, a sliced hot Italian sausage, and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching season 2, episodes 25 and 26 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story a horse escapes from a trailer and wanders into Samantha’s back yard. When Samantha discovers her she seems to be communicating but Samantha can’t understand so she turns her into a human. She says her name is Dally Ran and that she is a racehorse. She explains that the problem is that she is never allowed to win races but is rather used to set them up by setting a pace that tires the other horses out so her sister can come from behind and win. She finds it very frustrating and so that’s why she ran away. Darrin comes home with his old friend Gus and the transformed horse is introduced as Dolly Rand. Gus is an inventor who needs money to finance his invention. Dolly suggests that they go to the track and she can help him win money with her intimate knowledge of horses. She takes her friends to the stables where she learns from one of the horses that the others are going to let a certain horse win because it’s his birthday. The horse is a longshot but it wins. She then talks to another horse who says he’s hot today. Dolly tells Gus to bet half his money but the horse loses. Before the next race Dolly runs into her trainer Jack who says Adorable Diane is sick and he sure wishes Dally Ran was there. This is Dolly’s big chance so Samantha changes her back and Dally Ran enters the race. She starts off far behind but catches up and wins. 

            Dolly was played by Patty Regan, who first appeared in the Billy Barnes Musical reviews with Joanne Worley and Ken Barry. These were so popular that they moved to Broadway and then to London. She played Daphne Parmenter on F-Troop and Maxwell Smart’s landlady on Get Smart. 

            In the second story Samantha leaves her mother Endora to babysit Tabatha. Gladys Kravitz comes over with her nephew Edgar who is the same age as Tabatha. When Gladys begins to brag about how much more advanced Edgar is than Tabatha, Endora casts a spell to cause Tabatha to briefly talk to Gladys. Gladys comes back with reporters. Samantha and Darrin tell them that it was all a mistake. When they are about to ask Endora, Darrin tells them not to listen to her because she makes up things. This triggers Endora to make the baby talk again. The next day Tabatha is front page news and the main story on the TV news shows. A hundred people are standing outside Tabatha’s home day and night. Endora thinks it’s good to have a crowd and be the centre of attention but Samantha tells her that if Tabatha becomes a celebrity she will have very little time for her family. This convinces Endora to help rectify this problem. The reporters are called again and this time Endora convinces them that she used to be a ventriloquist in Vaudeville. That results in the papers printing a retraction. 

            I had something in my eye all through dinner until well after I went to bed. It was probably a speck of dust from all the sanding I’ve been doing of the bathroom ceiling.

May 16, 1994: I took my daughter to work day and night

Thirty years ago today

            On Monday my daughter was still staying with me while her mother was away. So I took her with me when I posed during the day at Northern Secondary School and again in the evening when I worked at the Ontario College of Art.

Harry Holcombe

            On Tuesday morning just as I was about to start yoga I saw another coyote or probably the same one as last month. That’s the third coyote I’ve seen from my window. The first time was last year when one ran north through the Dollarama parking lot and up O’Hara. This year the two sightings were of one coming down O’Hara. Last month it went south through the Dollarama parking lot but this time it veered and went down Dunn Avenue instead. I suspect it avoided the parking lot because a car was parked there. I assume the other time it went down Dunn from the parking lot anyway. I’m wondering what’s north on O’Hara that is interesting for a coyote and I’m guessing that north of the West Lodge apartments it might have access to the railroad tracks where I assume there are rabbits and other tasty live things to eat. 

            I finished posting “Brothers”, my translation of “Les frères” by Boris Vian. Tomorrow I’ll do another search for the words to the next six songs on my chronological Boris Vian list. If I can’t find them I’ll start learning his song “On fait des rêves” (We Keep Dreaming). 

            I wasn’t quite able to memorize the fourth verse of “Quoi toi moi t’aimer tu rêves” (What You Love of Me is what You Dream) by Serge Gainsbourg. I should have it nailed down on Wednesday. 

            I played my Martin acoustic guitar during song practice for the first of two sessions. 

            I weighed 87.4 kilos before breakfast. 

            I sanded another section of my bathroom ceiling. All that’s left to do is the area directly over the bathtub but that will take more than one more session and maybe more than two. I made sure that I changed my clothes to old ones before I started working and afterwards I took a shower. I’ve lived here since 1997 and the ceiling has never been sanded in my time here so I don’t know when it was painted. If it was before 1990 the paint dust might have lead in it. I might have time to do another section tomorrow unless I get an email about my amplifier having been fixed. When I've finish the ceiling the hardest part will be over so I think I’ll take a break and start shopping for an effects pedal for my guitar.

            I weighed 87.3 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. I wore my shirt unbuttoned but probably could have gone with just my undershirt. 

            I weighed 86.8 kilos at 17:45, which is the lightest I’ve been in the evening in a week. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 18:34. 

            I compared my August 5 and 9 song practice performances of “La bas c’est natural” and I think August 9 looks a little better. I also made a slight strumming error on August 5. I compared August 11 to August 9 and found that August 11 looks better although there’s a slight rhythm error and a lot of traffic noise. I’m going with August 11 for now. I compared August 15 with August 11 and I think August 11 looks better. I compared August 27 to August 11 and found that August 27 looks and sounds better and there is less traffic noise. I compared August 31 to 27 and I think August 27 is a little better. I compared September 6 with August 27 and August 27 may be slightly better but September 6 has the edge because it’s already synchronized in Movie Maker. There’s traffic noise but that’s picked up louder by the camera microphone. If I use mostly the Audacity recording not much is picked up. At least that’s been my experience with other songs. So the acoustic version of this song I’ll upload to YouTube will be the one from September 6. Next there are nine acoustic takes of “Kenya” to compare.

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song Angeline I edited the copy of the movie Head that shows Mickey Dolenz jumping from the Golden Gate Bridge into the ocean. I cut out a lot of the double exposure shots as he’s falling. Once he hits the water the colours become psychedelic and I think that scene will fit the third and final chorus that goes, “I feel I’m falling through your painful painted dream”. But there are parts where the colours kind of splash together and blur the imagery, so I cut out the parts that don’t show a distinctive human form falling underwater. I also edited away the segment with the mermaids. I was left with about thirty seconds of clips. I inserted the first two into the main video to push the concert video back so it is in line with the studio audio when I begin the second chorus. It’s still slightly off but I have to figure out whether it’s ahead or behind. 

            I cut up a whole chicken and grilled the parts in the oven. I had a chicken leg and a potato with the last of the gravy while watching season 2, episodes 23 and 24 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story it’s Darrin’s birthday and Samantha’s mother Endora decides to give him the fulfillment of three wishes without warning. For the first he wishes that an elevator would hurry up and it drops like a bullet with passengers inside. For the second he wishes that he could see one of the secretaries in a bikini and she suddenly is, much to her surprise. Later he learns that Mr. Turgeon, a very important client who refuses to deal with anyone but Larry is waiting for Larry in his office. The problem is that Larry is in Chicago and his plane is grounded because of fog. Darrin wishes he could be Larry Tate for one day and suddenly he is, though it takes a few minutes for him to realize it. Darrin as Larry goes for lunch with Turgeon, then Turgeon introduces him to his niece Joyce in hopes that Larry will help Joyce get into Larry’s company. Turgeon leaves them alone but then Larry’s wife Louise walks in and gets the wrong impression enough to slap her husband’s face. Later when Louise understands her mistake she cooks Larry his favourite dinner as an apology. Darrin takes the opportunity to call Samantha to ask for help. Samantha comes to Larry’s house and tries to undo the spell but finds out that it is time sensitive and he’ll change back at midnight. Louise wants Samantha to go home so she can be alone with Larry. Darrin is trying to avoid going to bed with Louise but he does put on Larry’s pyjamas. Then at quarter to midnight a fully dressed Larry comes home causing Louise to become very confused, especially when he goes out to the car to get his bags and Louise finds Larry in his pyjamas in another room. Samantha keeps jinxing Larry to keep him from getting back into the house right away. Darrin tells Louise he’ll get rid of Samantha but for her to go to bed first. She wants him to kiss her goodnight. He is just giving her a quick kiss on the lips when Larry walks in and sees Darrin in his pyjamas. Samantha causes Louise to fall asleep and collapse in Larry’s arms, then she explains that Louise has been sleepwalking. Louise will think it was all a dream. Larry thinks this experience is the result of him drinking on the plane. 

            In the second story Samantha and Darrin have a dinner engagement with an extremely important and eccentric client named J.T. Glendon. Samantha is trying to make a dress to wear for the occasion but it is not going well. Endora visits to remind Samantha that she had promised to have lunch with her. Samantha takes half an hour off to join her mother but it turns out that lunch is in Paris. Then Endora suggests that they drop in on Aubert, the greatest dress designer in Paris so Samantha can be inspired to finish her dress. But Aubert is privately viewing his four latest designs on four models and refuses to receive guests. He tells his assistant Brigette to send them away. Endora puts everyone in suspended animation so she and Samantha can appear and have a look at the designs. Then Samantha goes home to return to her dressmaking. She thinks she is finished but then Darrin comes home and asks her to hurry up and finish it because they have to meet Glendon. Samantha has no choice but to use witchcraft and to make an exact copy of one of Aubert’s dresses. Glendon’s wife and sister are also at the dinner party and they are very impressed with the dress Samantha is wearing. Darrin brags that she made it herself and so Doris Glendon and Ethel Granger ask her to make a dress for each of them. J.T. Glendon is such an important client that Darrin unilaterally volunteers on Samantha’s behalf and so Samantha gives in and says she’ll do it. Then Samantha’s neighbour Gladys Kravitz asks her to make her a dress too and she doesn’t have the heart to turn her down. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Samantha, Darrin’s newest client is Aubert of Paris. It’s a secret and so Darrin invites Doris and Ethel to wear their new dresses at a special cocktail party. Gladys gets herself and Abner invited as well. At the party Darrin reveals that his surprise guest is Aubert of Paris. Aubert walks out, sees his four latest designs before they are supposed to be revealed, and faints. Later Darrin tells Samantha that Aubert is going to sue his agency for $5 million. The thing that makes Aubert the most angry is that only Samantha looked good in his gown, while the other three women looked horrible. He has been trying and failing for years to break into the US market. This gives Samantha an idea. She appears before Aubert and suspends his animation while he can still understand what she is saying. She tells him that his designs fail in the US because he has been designing for women with fashion model figures. He has to think about the shape of the average US woman. She reanimates him and he understands that he needs to design for the pear shaped woman. Samantha promises to make dresses from his new designs. At the show the models are Doris, Ethel and Gladys. This was the very last appearance of Alice Pearce as Gladys because she died after this was filmed. 

            Glendon was played by Harry Holcombe, who started out as a director of radio programs, including Benny Goodman’s Carmel Caravan. His first film appearance was in The Purple V in 1943. He co-starred in the very short-lived sitcom Barefoot in the Park. He played the doctor on Bonanza. He was Grandpa in the Country Time lemonade commercials in the 70s.

May 15, 1994: It rained so my daughter and I played inside

Thirty years ago today

            On Sunday it might have rained, in which case my daughter and I probably played inside.

Arthur Julian

            On Monday morning I published “Brothers”, my translation of “Les frères” by Boris Vian on my Christian’s Translations blog. Tomorrow I’ll post the lyrics on Facebook. 

            I memorized the third verse of “Quoi toi moi t’aimer tu rêves” (What You Love of Me is what You Dream) by Serge Gainsbourg. There are two more verses to nail down and I should have them in my head by Wednesday. 

            I solved the problem of how to play my electric guitar without my Roland Jazz Chorus amp while it’s in the shop. It turns out that I really didn’t need to download the amp sims Amplitube and Guitar Gear because if I switch the speaker plug from the back of my computer to the headphones jack on my audio interface through a plug adaptor I can hear my guitar through the speakers because the speakers become Focusrite speakers that way. If I record through the interface what I make belongs to the computer and I can play it with the plug in the back but if I play live the Scarlett interface requires that I use its own speakers. 

            I opened Amplitube anyway and experimented with playing through the five free amps and with the reverb knob on each one. They have an amazing number of amps on the list but the imitations of famous amps all have to be paid for. I wonder if Pirate Bay has a crack for all of them. It was fun to fool around and to actually be able to play after my frustrating attempts to solve the problem over the last couple of days. One weird thing is when I shut down Amplitube to just get a clean sound from the interface the sound was still that of the last amp I’d been playing on Amplitube. I’ll be playing my Martin acoustic guitar for the next two days but if I don’t have my amp back by Thursday I’ll be doing a four session stretch on the Kramer again and I’ll experiment on at least one of those days with Guitar Gear. 

            I weighed 87.7 kilos before what would normally be breakfast but I had to fast so I could get the bloodwork done after my doctor’s appointment for my physical at 13:45. That’s 2.5 kilos heavier than this time last year, which was a kilo and a half heavier than the year before that. I’ll weigh myself again before I leave. I weighed 86 kilos at 12:30, which is the lightest I’ve been at midday since April 30. That’s 1.5 kilos heavier than last year. 

            I was half an hour early for my appointment with Dr. Shechtman but I only had to wait a few minutes. My blood pressure is normal at 119 over 69. He weighed me and I was 87.5 kilos. I was 83.2 kilos last year. I told him that I had blood in the toilet on April 6 and he thought I should go for a colonoscopy. But my stool was very hard on April 6 and I think it might have just been hemorrhoids. The poop test is coming up in June so I told him I’d wait for that. 

            I went to Life Labs for my blood work and the place was more crowded than I’ve ever seen it. I had to wait at least an hour because people with appointments get priority. So next year I think I’ll make an appointment. 

            On my way home on Queen a car nudged me as it sped past and almost knocked my wheel into a pot hole. 

            I weighed 86.4 at before a late lunch at 16:00. That’s the lightest I’ve been in the early afternoon since April 30. 

            I took a late siesta and slept for almost two hours. 

            I weighed 87 kilos at 18:30. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 19:40. 

            I reviewed the song practice videos of my performances of “La bas c’est natural” and “Kenya” from September 9 to 15. On September 9 and 15 I played “Kenya” on my Kramer electric guitar. On September 9 I broke a string on the Kramer and had to play the Fibson. It didn’t sound good. On September 15 the take at 11:30 in part B was okay. On September 11 and 13 I played it on my Martin acoustic guitar. On September 11 the take at 25:00 was pretty good and looked great. This is already in Movie Maker. On September 13 the take in Part B at 14:45 was pretty good. I played “La bas c’est natural” on the Martin on September 10 and 12. On September 10 the take at 3:00 in part B was pretty good but the light wasn’t great. On September 12 the take at 23:15 was okay but the light was bad. On September 14 I played it on the Kramer and the take at 0:45 in part B wasn’t bad. I now have 27 highlighted takes of these songs to re-review and decide which ones get uploaded to YouTube. 

            I had a potato with gravy and my last three pork ribs while watching season 2, episodes 21 and 22 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Samantha arrives at a restaurant to meet Darrin but he’s not there yet. She sits at their table and then a big guy tries to pick her up. Darrin shows up and confronts the man but is clearly outmatched. He will be beaten up if Samantha doesn’t do something and so she causes the bruiser to hurt his hand on Darrin’s nose and to be knocked out by Darrin’s wild swing. The next day Darrin is on the front page because the person he seemed to knock out is a well known professional boxer named Joe Kovac. That day when Darrin gets to work he finds Kovack and his manager in his office. Darrin is told that he has ruined Kovac’s reputation and so another confrontation has to be staged in a bar with reporters present. Kovack is going to approach Darrin to apologize but Darrin is to reject this and take a swing at Kovack. Kovack will then deliver a glancing blow and Darrin is to fall and pretend to be knocked out. Samantha calls Darrin’s office and learns that he’s gone to meet Kovac and Dundee’s Bar. She goes there and sees the confrontation. Not realizing that it is staged she causes Darrin to knock out Kovac again. Later Darrin goes for a drink at his regular bar when he meets another big man who recognizes him as the one that knocked out Kovac twice. He tells Darin to hit him once in the jaw and then he’ll hit him back. Darrin stands up to reason with the man but trips, stumbles into him, knocks him over and out. The bartender informs Darrin that he’s just knocked out Tommy Carter the heavy weight champion. Later Darrin’s boss Larry Tate comes to Darrin’s house to tell him that he’s gotten Tommy Carter to agree to appear at the Advertizers Annual Charity Ball. He’s going to box four rounds with the opponent of his choice. This looks like a continued story but it isn’t.

            One of the reporters was played by Norman Stevans, who started as an extra in 1943 at a time of big epics when extras were in great demand. He developed an extensive wardrobe to gain a reputation as a dress extra and he became known for being extremely dependable. In the 70s when work for extras petered out he became president of the Screen Extras Guild. 

            In the second story Darrin’s parents are coming for dinner and to see their grandchild Tabatha for the first time. Samantha has also invited her mother Endora. Endora has bought Tabatha a teddy bear. The grandmothers Phyllis and Endora have a rivalry over the affections of Tabatha. They also clash over which side of the family Tabatha most takes after. Then Phyllis brings out her gift for Tabatha, which is the exact same bear that Endora bought. Refusing to settle for being on an equal footing with Phyllis, Endora goes to the nursery and casts a spell on her bear, causing it to dance whenever the name “Tabatha” is spoken. Now Tabatha cries whenever Endora’s gift is taken away. Then Phyllis and Frank see Endora’s bear dancing and Phyllis finds it odd because the two bears are the same brand and identical. Darrin covers by saying he tinkered with Endora’s bear but that sets Frank off on a dream of mass manufacturing his son’s dancing bear and getting rich. Samantha gives Endora an ultimatum that until she removes the dancing spell, her granddaughter is off limits, so Endora gives in. But then Phyllis arrives with a stuffed clown that Tabatha likes more than the now non-dancing bear. So Endora renews the spell and makes the bear dance again. Then Frank brings a toy manufacturer named Hofstetter to look at the bear. Thinking that the spell is off Darrin brings the bear to show him but it begins to dance. Hofstetter says he wants the bear and asks them to name their terms. Then Samantha brings in the clown and makes it dance too. Hofstetter wants the clown as well. Samantha says right now Tabatha is the only child with dancing toys but if it is mass produced every child will have one. Phyllis is against it and in a rare moment Endora agrees with her. She doesn’t want crass commercialism to render her granddaughter as one of the crowd. The deal does not happen. 

            Hofstetter was played by Arthur Julian, who produced 96 episodes of Gimme a Break. He was a producer for Vacation Playhouse, and Amen. He was a writer for 17 episodes of Maude, Meet Millie, 30 episodes of F Troop, Bewitched, 30 episodes of Hogan’s Heroes, 25 episodes of The Carol Burnett Show, and The Doris Day Show.

May 14, 1994: It was a nice day so my daughter and I played outdoors

Thirty years ago today

            On Saturday it was a nice day so it is likely that my daughter and I played outdoors.

Eve Arden

            On Sunday morning I uploaded “Les frères” by Boris Vian to my Christian’s Translations blog and arranged the French verses as they are in the original text. I only now need to organize the lyrics for my translation and then publish it. That should be done tomorrow. 

            I memorized the second verse of “Quoi toi moi t’aimer tu rêves” (What You Love of Me is what You Dream) by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            Before song practice I opened up Amplitube to see if I could use it with my Kramer electric guitar through the audio interface. I couldn’t get any sound. The moving lights show that the app is hearing my guitar but I can’t hear it. I also can’t hear YouTube tutorials while the interface is plugged in. When I tried twice my computer shut down. I spent almost the whole morning trying to figure this problem out and I missed song practice. 

            I weighed 86.6 kilos before breakfast, which is the lightest I’ve been then since April 20. Mind you that’s because I missed breakfast three hours earlier. So breakfast became my lunch. I had cinnamon-raisin toast and spoon sized shredded wheat cereal with honey, bananas, and raspberries. 

            I downloaded Guitar Gear but couldn’t hear my guitar on that app either.

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back and thought about my audio problem while riding. It occurred to me that I could try unplugging the speaker plug from the back of my computer and plugging it into the headphone jack of my audio interface. That was the solution I used to hear the cassette-to-MP3 converter through my speakers. When I got home I tried it and there was still silence but then I realized the headphone volume was down. I turned it up and could finally hear my guitar. I tried a few of the free amps in Amplitube and found one with a clean sound. That worked fine but then suddenly the sound was gone again and I couldn’t figure out if I’d done anything to cause it. I tried Guitar Gear again and that still didn’t work. I went back to Amplitube and fiddled a bit with things but to no avail. Finally I tried unplugging and re-plugging the speaker plug in the headphone jack and the guitar was back again. This time I made sure I didn’t touch anything because I wanted my guitar to play amplified for song practice tomorrow. I closed down Amplitube and found the guitar was still playing through the interface. I don’t know if it always would have or if it was somehow a residual effect from Amplitube. I guess I’ll find out in the morning. 

            I weighed 87 kilos at 18:00. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 19:15. 

            I reviewed the song practice videos of my performances of “Kenya” and “La bas c’est natural” from September 1 to 7. I played “Kenya” on my Martin acoustic guitar on September 1 and 7. On September 1 the take at 25:00 was pretty good and looked good. On September 7 the take at 7:00 in part B was pretty good but I fumbled my strumming at one point. On September 3 and 5 I played it on my Kramer electric and on September 3 the take at 13:00 in part B wasn’t bad. It’s already in Movie Maker. On September 5 the take at 6:00 in part B was okay. I played “La bas c’est natural” on the Kramer on September 4 and the take at 3:30 in part B was one of the best of those played with the electric, plus it looked good. On September 6 I played it on the Martin and the take at 4:00 in part B was pretty good, plus this is in Movie Maker. On September 2 nothing past “Sixteen Tons of Dogma” got recorded. 

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “Angeline” I imported the clip from the movie Head of Mickey Dolenz falling in slow motion from the Golden Gate Bridge. I copied it to the end of the timeline and began editing out everything but Dolenz falling. Once he hits the water the colours go psychedelic as he falls underwater as well. Some mermaids come to try and drag him down but I’ll cut that out as well because the chorus is about falling and not being dragged. 

            I made pizza on naan with Basilica sauce, a sliced hot Italian sausage, and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching season 2, episodes 18 and 19 of Bewitched. 

            When the first story begins Samantha is already in labour and on the way to the hospital. The phone rings when she is on her way out the door and it is her cousin Serena. This is the first appearance of Serena on the series and she is also played by Elizabeth Montgomery. She has black hair, dark sultry clothing and a somewhat darker personality. That’s not to say that she’s evil but her ethical boundaries are more blurred than those of Samantha. She’s really like a younger version of Samantha’s mother Endora.

            After the intro a few hours have passed as Darrin paces in the waiting room. Samantha’s mother Endora appears before Darrin to inform him that he is the father of a baby girl. Darrin and Endora have a rare bonding moment. Darrin goes to see Samantha and their daughter under the watchful eye of the very strict Nurse Kelton. Endora wants the baby to be called Tabatha and says she’ll call her that whatever she is named. She fills the room with flowers but has a clash with Kelton who says too many flowers use up the oxygen in the room. I don’t think flowers or any plants use up oxygen and the leaves of plants actually produce it. Endora vanishes and then Serena arrives. It looks like they haven’t seen each other since they were much younger which could have been centuries. She offers to get the baby a Centaur but Samantha tells her to get a rattle instead. Serena also fills the room with flowers. Samantha warns her she’ll get in trouble with Nurse Kelton but Serena informs her that she’s turned Kelton into a frog and has her in her purse. Samantha makes her change her back. She does so and Kelton immediately complains about the flowers. Serena makes the flowers vanish and Kelton begins to doubt her own sanity. Then Serena disappears, which adds to Kelton’s fears. 

            Meanwhile Darrin and Endora are watching the baby through the nursery window. She says she’ll grow up to look just like Samantha. Darrin asks how she knows and Endora offers to turn her into a young lady for a few minutes to prove it. He warns her not to. Endora reminds him to call his parents about the baby. When he leaves she enters the nursery and takes the baby to her mother who was only allowed to hold her daughter for a minute because of those strange and illogical hospital rules of that era. I doubt if they do it that way anymore. Then Darrin meets Serena at the nursery and when he sees his daughter is missing he thinks that Endora has acted on her suggestion and turned the baby into a young woman. Serena does not know who Darrin is and thinks he’s trying to pick her up as he follows her to the toy store, confronts her and tells her he’s her father. She sends him back to the nursery. He goes to the toy store and chases Serena again. She dresses him like a Blackfoot chief in a war bonnet and doeskin and then disappears. Then Endora appears and when Darrin confronts her she sends him back to the nursery. Nurse Kelton says, “You’re not really here are you?” and Darrin confirms he’s not. He goes to Samantha’s room where he sees Serena and a baby. He asks who the baby is. Serena gags him, puts him in a straight jacket and disappears. Then Kelton walks in and happily tells the fourth wall, “Not there!” Later Darrin explains to Kelton that he’s a practical joker. Darrin decides he owes it to Endora to call his daughter Tabatha. 

            Nurse Kelton was played by the great Eve Arden, who quit school at 16 to join a stock company. Her film debut was in Song of Love. She appeared on Broadway four times in the late 1930s. She co-starred in Having Wonderful Time and Anatomy of a Murder. She was nominated for an Academy Award for her supporting role in Mildred Pierce. Her success on the screen led to her becoming a radio star in Our Miss Brooks in 1948. She was voted the top radio comedienne in the late 1940s. The show’s success led to it becoming a hit TV sitcom in which she also starred for four years and then it was also a movie. The Eve Arden Show in 1957 was a failure but ten years later she co-starred in The Mothers in Law, which ran for two seasons. 

            

            

            

            

            In the second story Darrin wakes up to hear the baby crying and goes to feed her. Meanwhile Samantha is half asleep in bed and makes the bottle float to the baby. Darrin follows it and thinks he now knows that Tabatha really is a witch. Samantha sets him straight and then Gladys and Abner Kravitz arrive to give the baby the gift of a stock certificate for one share of stock. The stock is Poughkeepsie Woollens and Abner says it is safe because it hasn’t lost or gained in twenty years. They got it through Gladys’s cousin Julius Cushman. Next by a strange coincidence Poughkeepsie Woollens stock goes up six points for the first time in twenty years. Darrin thinks Tabatha might have caused this to happen and so he tries an experiment. He holds the financial page in front of her and buys whatever stock she points at. He buys Nelson Aerodynamics which also hasn’t gone up in years, but it does now. Julius calls Gladys to tell her that Darrin must have some inside information. Gladys goes over to snoop. She already suspects Samantha of voodoo and when she finds the financial section in the nursery she draws the same conclusions as Darrin about the baby. She gets Tabatha to pick a stock. They sell Poughkeepsie Woollens to buy the new stock, then it drops and they lose everything. Darrin thinks Tabatha’s picks only work if she stands to profit and so he buys the same stock as Gladys in Tabatha’s name and this time it gains. Darrin talks with Julius and hears the logical reasons why all of those stocks went up. Now he admits he was wrong about Tabatha.

May 13, 1994: I was sent home from the art school because my daughter touched my penis while I was posing

Thirty years ago today

            On Friday morning I took my daughter to work with me at Central Technical School but was called into Vice Principal Marsh’s office. He told me that when I was posing with my daughter a week and a half before and she had curiously reached up and touched my penis, one of the adult students complained to Children's Aid. Marsh was on my side and knew there was nothing to it but advised me to go home and lay low for a while until this had blown over.

Sharon DeBord

            On Saturday morning I memorized the first verse and the chorus of “Quoi toi moi t’aimer tu rêves” (What You Love of Me is What You Dream) by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            I played my Kramer electric guitar without amplification during song practice for the first of two sessions but it was annoying. I can hear what I’m doing for the most part but not always. I stopped a few times to try to figure out how to play my guitar through the audio interface. The levels register the input but I can’t hear the output. I might have to download an amp simulator. I saw a demo of a free version of Amplitube that looks pretty good. Because I stopped playing to do research I had to shorten each song to get through song practice not too late. 

            I weighed 87.3 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I went down to No Frills. I was going to try another experiment with my bike trailer and see if it works better for shopping with the milk crate strapped on for a basket. But I was running late and I knew it would probably be time consuming. I bought five bags of grapes, a pack of strawberries, a pack of raspberries, bananas, Basilica sauce, two containers of skyr, two bags of sweet chili chips, and a jug of orange juice. I weighed 87.3 kilos before lunch. I had saltines with five-year-old cheddar and a glass of lemon iced tea. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. It was sprinkling the whole time but not enough to get me wet. 

            I weighed 87.3 kilos at 17:10. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 18:15. 

            I downloaded the guitar amp simulator Amplitube after researching a bit. Another amp sim called Blue Cat gets more frequently mentioned as the best of the free ones but I saw “easy to use” more often in reviews of Amplitube. It took about two hours during which time I did other things and so I’ve yet to try and use it. 

            I reviewed the song practice videos of my performances of “La bas c’est natural” and “Kenya” from August 25 to 31. I played “La bas c’est natural” on my Martin acoustic guitar on August 25, 27, and 31. On August 25 the take at 17:15 in Part B sounded okay but there was bad light and traffic noise. On August 27 the take at 22:45 was pretty good, there was low traffic noise and it looked good. On August 31 the take at 9:15 in Part B was okay. On August 29 I played it on my Kramer electric guitar and the take at 7:45 in part B was okay but I could have looked friendlier at the end. On August 26 and 28 I played “Kenya” on the Martin. On August 26 the take at 22:15 was pretty good and looked good. On August 28 the take at 21:45 was not bad. On August 30 my electric performance of “Kenya” wasn’t recorded because the camera battery was past its bedtime. 

            I downloaded the video of the scene from the movie Head in which Mickey Dolenz jumps off the Golden Gate Bridge and falls in slow motion. I converted it to WMV and tomorrow I’ll import it into the Movie Maker project for my song “Angeline” to edit and use for the second chorus. 

            I grilled five hot Italian sausages and sliced two of them onto a naan pizza with Basilica sauce and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching season 2, episodes 16 and 17 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Darrin is having trouble coming up with a slogan for the Kingsley Potato Chip campaign. He’s been working too hard and he’s all tensed up. Samantha muses that it would be good for him to get away for a while. His boss Larry says he has a cabin in the woods upstate they could use. He hasn’t been there for three years and now it’s up for sale. Samantha and Darrin decide to go there and find it extremely run down. Even the fireplace is falling apart. It begins to storm outside and the roof is leaking. They consider leaving so Darrin lets Samantha conjure a phone to find out if the roads are washed out and they are. Reluctantly Darrin lets Samantha use witchcraft to transform the place into a luxury cabin in Early American style. Meanwhile some newlyweds named Alice and Charles MacBain come to see Larry because they are considering buying his cabin. They want to drive up and check it out tomorrow. So the next day while Samantha and Darrin are in town shopping, the MacBains arrive and let themselves into the cabin that Samantha had only transformed for the three days of her and Darrin’s stay there with the intention of changing it back to its dilapidated state upon leaving. The MacBains fall in love with the cabin immediately and call Larry from the phone that isn’t supposed to be there and has no connecting wires, to tell him that they want to buy the place. When Samantha and Darrin find the MacBains there and learn their plans they are at odds with each other on what to do. Darrin says it is dishonest to let them buy a magically transformed property while Samantha argues that they would be happy there. Alice says this is their dream home, plus they need it for Charles’s health. Darrin gives in and doesn’t make Samantha change the cabin back. The MacBains go back to the city to pack. A day or so later Darrin and Samantha are getting ready to leave when Larry arrives, which forces Samantha to change the cabin back to its dilapidated state. Then the MacBains return and so Samantha has to change the cabin back to its beautiful form while altering Larry’s perception so he still sees a run down cabin. The MacBains give Larry their down payment of $1000 and Samantha is shocked to learn that the full price Larry is charging is $5000 ($50,000 today) for what he perceives as a run down shack. Samantha makes Larry feel guilty and he tells the MacBains that he’s selling it to them for the amount of the down payment of $1000. 

            In the second story Samantha is almost at full term in her pregnancy (Elizabeth Montgomery was pregnant in real life and so nothing was faked in that department). She is still doing housework but Darrin is worried about her exerting herself and wants her to take it easy. He says he’s going to hire a maid for her. So Samantha has to interview several prospects of which we see three. The first is Mrs. Luftwaffe who wants to see Samantha’s references. Samantha uses magic to make her kitchen messy so the stuffy woman rejects her. The next is a very young and attractive woman named Barbara whose five references are all from husbands. She wants to see a picture Darren and so Samantha makes his portrait look like a farmer. The third is Naomi who is trying to put her son through medical school but confesses from the start that she is accident prone but promises to pay for everything she breaks. Samantha always supports the underdog and so she hires Naomi. That night they have Larry and Louise Tate over for dinner and Naomi cooks but it is a disaster in the kitchen and so Samantha uses magic to help Naomi out. Saturday is Naomi’s day off but Louise calls Samantha to say their maid had to go away and asks if she can lend her Naomi to work her magic in her kitchen like she did in Samantha’s. Samantha keeps sneaking away from Darrin to help Naomi out. The next day Naomi quits because she knows they’ll have to fire her eventually and she wants it to happen before the baby arrives because she knows she would become attached to it. She then works out in her head the math of the percentages of her pay of all the breakage. Samantha points out to Darrin how good at math Naomi is and he agrees. She asks if he can find her a job in the accounting department of his company and he thinks he can. 

            Larry’s secretary, Miss Thatcher was played by Sharon DeBord, who started as a stenographer for ABC and then a secretary for Warner Brothers. She only considered acting later and started working in theatre. A producer saw her perform in the play Roman Candle and cast her in General Hospital on which she played Nurse Sharon Pinkham for nine years. She starred in the movie That Tennessee Beat.

May 12, 1994: It was cool but clear so we played outside

Thirty years ago today

            Thursday was on the cool side but clear, so my daughter and I probably played outside.

Jill Foster

            On Friday morning the heat was on so I turned it off because it was ten degrees and rising outside but the thermostat in the hall wouldn’t get the message for a few more degrees. 

            I finally finished memorizing “Les frères” by Boris Vian. Since there are no samples of the melody online I won’t be working out the chords so tomorrow I’ll upload the lyrics to Christian’s Translations. 

            I published “Unzipped”, my translation of “Hey Mister Zippo” by Serge Gainsbourg on my Christian’s Translations blog and posted the lyrics on Facebook. I started learning his song “Quoi toi moi t’aimer tu rêves” (What You Love of Me Is What You Dream). Again the only audio for this song is an extract from the middle on Apple Music. 

            I played my Martin acoustic guitar for the final session of four. The next two sessions I would normally play my Kramer electric guitar but my amp is in the shop. I’ll see if I can play the Kramer through my speakers but if not then I’ll just play the Martin until I get my amp back. 

            I weighed 87.6 kilos before breakfast. 

            In the late morning I sanded another section of my bathroom ceiling. I had expected to complete a third quarter of it but only managed more than half of that area. I started with the front legs of the stepladder in the front of the bathtub and the ladder on the other side. Then I gradually moved the ladder as I edged back until I’d done half of a strip of the ceiling. Then I switched it so the ladder was inside the tub and sanded a parallel strip of ceiling. Next time I’ll start from the other end of the tub and complete those two strips. Then all that will be left to do is the area directly over the tub. There’s only so much looking up and sanding I can do with old paint coming down around the sunglasses and the surgical mask. Plus it makes a mess and I had to sweep and shower and change my dusty clothes before lunch. 

            I weighed 86.9 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and on the way back I stopped at the African Drum shop on Dundas. This time Seiku had fixed the little tonga drum that I’d brought in. The original skin was synthetic I think, but he replaced it with cow hide. One can still see a few hairs along the edge where it’s been tightened. He sanded the surface a little more before I paid him and I took a couple of pictures of him sanding and playing the drum. I paid him $50 in cash. His shop is a unique place that is charmingly cluttered with all kinds of African crafts and drums. He says he can’t stop buying things. 

            I stopped at Freshco to buy a pack of sponge towels. 

            I weighed 87 kilos at 17:30. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 19:00. 

            I reviewed the song practice videos of my performances of “Kenya” and “La bas c’est natural” from August 18 to 24. I played Kenya on my Kramer electric guitar on August 18, 20, and 24. On August 18 the take at 3:30 in part B was okay but the singing was off key at the end. On August 20 the take at 3:15 in part B was one of the best electric versions. On August 24 the take at 3:30 in part B was not bad for the electric. On August 22 I played “Kenya” on my Martin acoustic and the take at 25:45 was not bad. On August 19 I played “La bas c’est natural” on the Kramer and the take at 1:00 in part B was one of the best. This is synchronized in Movie Maker. On August 21 I played it on the Martin and the take at 27:00 was not bad but there was washed out light. On August 23 I didn’t make it through “Joanna” before the camera battery timed out. 

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “Angeline” I cut out all but three of the clips of Greta Garbo singing in the silent film Torrent. The three I kept are all of her playing piano while singing. I copied the first two and pasted them into the main video after my line, “my machinery had a surge of power that night I listened to your song”. In the concert video I sing “Ahhh” before the next line but in the studio audio I don’t and so I needed to get rid of the part of the video that shows me with my mouth staying wide open. The Garbo clips fit well but I had to shave a little off the end of the second one and then cut out a few seconds from the concert video until it was synchronized with the studio audio for the line, “my skin felt all electrical”. Once that was lined up the video stayed in sync with the audio right up until the beginning of the second chorus. For the choruses I want video clips of people falling. For the first chorus I inserted clips from a 1950s adaptation of Alice in Wonderland that shows Alice falling down the rabbit hole. For the second chorus I want the segment from the movie Head that shows Mickey Dolenz jumping from the Golden Gate Bridge and falling in slow motion. I had bookmarked a video of that part last year. This time I pasted the link into 4K Downloader but it just kept parsing so nothing happened. I’ll try again tomorrow. 

            I had a potato with gravy and five pork ribs while watching season 2, episodes 13 and 14 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Samantha’s mother Endora wants Samantha and Darrin to come to a family wedding but Darrin says his boss Larry would not agree to him taking the time off. Endora offers to make Larry into an inanimate object for a few days and promises he won’t know the difference after he’s been changed back. Darrin says no and goes to work. Later Endora appears in a toy store where Larry is shopping for a teddy bear for his son. She asks if Darrin can have a couple of days off and Larry says “of course”. Endora learns that Larry is looking for a special teddy bear that nods its head when one presses its toe. She conjures one up and then takes it to leave with Larry’s receptionist. But when Darrin comes in, sees it and hears that Endora left it he thinks that she has turned Larry into a teddy bear. He spends the day nervously protecting the bear, even during a presentation, much to the annoyance of the client Mr. Harper. Harper insists that Darrin leave the bear with Betty the receptionist. But while it is at her desk Larry’s wife Louise arrives and sees the bear. She has already bought an identical one for their son and so she takes this bear to return it to the store. When Darrin hears about this later he goes to the store to try to get Larry back. But there are 24 identical bears on display and since he can’t tell the difference he buys them all. At home he and Samantha find that one of the bears has no tag and so they assume that it’s Larry. Then Endora appears and Darrin verbally attacks her. She responds by destroying the bear. Darrin thinks Larry is dead now but then he and Louise arrive for dinner as they were invited to do. The next day Darrin gets sore knees from begging Endora’s forgiveness. 

            In the second story Darrin is full of compliments for Samantha’s beauty on his way to work. After he leaves, Endora tells her that he is lying like all mortals do and she decides to prove it. She acquires an ancient statuette that causes anyone within a meter of it to tell the truth and places it on Darrin’s desk. Darrin compliments Betty’s tight dress and she says she wore it for him. He gets a call from a client and Darrin tells him he has no enthusiasm for his product. Larry is mad that Darrin has just thrown the account away until he gets close to the statue and admits that he feels the same way. Darrin takes the statue home and on the way he gets stopped by a motorcycle cop who claims he went through a red light. But when he gets close to the statue he admits the light was yellow but he was in a bad mood. That night Darrin and Samantha are having a dinner party for Larry and Louise Tate and Ed and Frances Hotchkis. Endora subtly hints that she would like to come and so Samantha invites her. That night Endora keeps moving the statue around to cause people to tell the truth. Darrin tells the client Hotchkis that his ideas are ridiculous. Hotchkis is a pompous ass and his wife is a submissive mouse until the statue appears near her and she proceeds to tell her husband off for the first time in their marriage. At one point they are all standing next to the statue and arguing. Suffice it to say dinner is ruined. The next morning Endora reveals that she caused everyone to tell the truth with the statue. Then Larry arrives to complain about Darrin’s behaviour the night before. He suggests that maybe Darrin should no longer be working for him but then Samantha brings the statue close and Larry admits how important Darrin is to his company. Larry also tells them that Ed and Frances Hotchkis argued into the night and it cleared up a lot of misunderstandings. They are now happier with each other than they’ve ever been. Then Darrin demands a raise before he returns to work and Larry gives it to him. 

            Darrin’s secretary Betty was played by Canadian actor Jill Foster, who started in theatre in Toronto. This led to a contract with the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation for which she acted in many TV series. She played eight different parts on General Motors Presents. She married Canadian TV writer Bernard Slade and they moved to Hollywood. She made a few guest appearances on sitcoms and then returned to Canadian theatre.