September 27, 1996: I bought my first electric guitar

Thirty years ago today

            On Friday I went to the annual Long and McQuade sale where I bought my first electric guitar. I got a beautiful vermillion Kramer with the Floyd Rose tuning system. I didn’t know anything about the Floyd Rose but just thought it looked cool. It was complicated getting in tune initially but once it was in tune it stayed there for weeks. I also bought a Roland Jazz Chorus-50 amplifier.

    I played it that night on the Spit Fridays open stage in the back room of the Cameron and some people said the electric was a better sound for me than my acoustic. 

Frances O'Connor

            On Wednesday after midnight I put fresh carpet tape on the edges of my mattress where the old tape had gotten less sticky. I lint rolled the curtains between the bedroom and the living room and caught several bedbugs. I went to bed around 1:48 and pretty much slept until the alarm went off at 5:00. After yoga I found several bedbugs caught on the tape on the floor at the head of my bed. I also caught one on the curtain.

            I translated about half of “Les bienfaits de la pratique” (The Benefits of Practice) by Boris Vian.

            I worked out the chords for the instrumental intro and some of the first line of “La fille aux claquettes” (The Tap Dancing Girl) by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            I weighed 91.35 kilos before breakfast, which is the heaviest I’ve been in the morning since September 15. 

            I played my Martin during song practice for the first of two sessions and it went out of tune all the time. I took several photos and dead and alive bedbugs and sent some of them by email to the city bylaw officer Jamal Logan. He got back to me in the late afternoon and said, “Thank you for providing me with this. I’ve moved forward with issuing a property standards order that will be mailed out the following day, allowing 30 days for compliance from the property owner.” 

            I weighed 91.95 kilos before lunch. I had peanut butter and five-year-old cheddar on saltines with a glass of lemonade. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 91.2 kilos at 18:25. 

            I was still two days behind in my journal and worked on getting caught up. 

            I made pizza on a slice of 7 grain sandwich bread with marinara, tomato pesto, a chopped New Zealand grass fed beef burger, and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a glass of Creemore lager while watching season 2, episode 6 of Wednesday with my daughter Astrid on Discord. 

            The show opens with Wednesday putting on makeup and donning a bright coloured outfit with a mini-skirt, then dances happily through the Nevermore campus while posing for smart phone cameras. I said to Astrid this extremely uncharacteristic display of brightness and exuberance must be a dream. She thought it might be a shape shifter posing as Wednesday, but we would find out later that we were both wrong. 

            13 hours and 16 minutes earlier, Wednesday is in Principal Dort’s office with Sherrif Santiago, Enid, and Wednesday’s parents Morticia and Gomez Addams. The issue being addressed is the attack by Tyler Galpin in his Hyde form during the Day of the Dead celebration. Wednesday reminds Dort that she warned him about Tyler. Francoise Galpin, Tyler’s mother, had also appeared in her Hyde form but Morticia talked her out of attacking and made her promise to leave Jericho with Tyler. She assures Dort and Santiago that the Hydes are now gone from Jericho. Dort institutes a school curfew. 

            Wednesday is still without her psychic powers. The ghost of former Principal Weems is Wednesday’s spirit guide and she tells Wednesday she won’t get her powers back until she resolves her issues with her mother and with her own emotions. 

            Wednesday learns from Professor Orloff that Francoise had a brother named Isaac who was a DaVinci and who designed Orloff’s robotic life support system. He tells her that Isaac died in a lab explosion and is said to be buried under the Skull Tree. Wednesday realizes that Isaac is the corpse that her brother Pugsley accidentally brought back to life with his electrical powers and took as his pet zombie, Slurp.

            Francoise and Tyler are hiding out in an underground bunker. She has Tyler chained to his bed and plans to become his new master. But she is coughing blood sometimes and reveals that Hydes do not live long. 

            Professor Capri visits Enid and addresses the phenomenon of her having turned into her werewolf side when there was no full moon. She explains that she could be that rare type of werewolf known as an Alpha. 

            Wednesday visits her Grandmama and asks for a way to get her powers back. She tells her to the grave of former Nevermore Professor Rosaline Rotwood and if she reads aloud the inscription she will be granted temporary psychic powers. Wednesday breaks curfew to find the headstone but while she is there, Enid learns that Professor Capri is doing dorm checks. If Wednesday is discovered missing then Enid will also be punished and she’ll miss the gala, so she goes after Wednesday. Meanwhile Wednesday reads the inscription and is transported in her mind to the spirit realm where she meets Rotwood (played stiffly by Lady Gaga). Rotwood shows her a candle flame and tells her if she can keep her hand on it for a certain time she will be granted temporary sight. She is baring the flame without flinching when suddenly Enid arrives and grabs her, cutting her contact with the flame. Both Wednesday and Enid collapse on the graveyard grass and wake up in each other’s bodies. 

            Wednesday goes out in Enid’s body and is grabbed from behind by Enid’s lover Bruno but Wednesday flips him with a judo toss and sternly warns him not to try it again. 

            Enid, in Wednesday’s body tries to continue with her colourful life but breaks out in hives because Wednesday is literally allergic to colour. Morticia notices this and provides her with the remedy she is supposed to be taking for her affliction. Enid has to agree to come to an Addams Family dinner.

            Meanwhile Isaac finds the underground bunker where his sister and nephew are hiding. He tells Francoise he can cure her of being a Hyde but needs the right equipment. 

            Enid, in Wednesday’s body discovers Wednesdays novel and discovers that a character in the book is based on her and made ridiculous. She is offended and decides to get revenge by humiliating Wednesday in public and that’s where we came in. 

            Wednesday, in Enid’s body discovers that Bruno is cheating on her and breaks up with him.

            Thinking Wednesday is Enid, Professor Capri tells her that she has to spend the night at the Lupin Cages so she can safely transform into a werewolf. 

            Thing attends a support group for separated appendages. He says he doesn’t know where he came from. He was found by the Addams Family with the only key to his past being a signet ring. 

            At the Addams Family dinner, the ghost of Weems appears to Morticia and reveals that it is Enid and not her daughter sitting at the table. 

            Isaac enters Orloff’s lab and reclaims the power source from Orloff’s robot body. He then eats Orloff’s brain so a great mind will not go to waste. He takes the power source and goes with Francoise and Tyler back to Willow Hill to reactivate the burned out machinery, while Agnes invisibly follows them. 

            Enid in Wednesday’s body finds Wednesday in her body at the Lupin Cages and tells her that she’s learned that if they don’t switch back by dawn then they will both die. Agnes calls Wednesday to tell her that Isaac, Francoise, and Tyler have gone to Willow Hill. Tyler detects Agnes, captures her and locks her in a cell. When the switched Wednesday and Enid arrive, Tyler captures the one he thinks is Enid and places her in a cell. But Wednesday transforms into a gigantic black Alpha werewolf and smashes free of the cell and even Tyler is no match for her. She doesn’t have time to do harm to Tyler because the lab is about to explode and so everyone escapes. 

            The switched Wednesday and Enid return to Rotwood’s grave. They touch it together and share the things they’ve learned about each other while in each other’s bodies. Enid admires Wednesday’s fearlessness but also realizes that she fears she is too dark for even her mother to bear and fears being rejected by Morticia like she did her sister Ophelia. 

            Wednesday says she admires Enid’s quiet strength. She knows Enid fears being an Alpha will render her solitary but Wednesday vows she won’t let that happen. The girls collapse and wake up back in their own bodies. 

            Weems appears before Wednesday and tells her that the premonition of her causing Enid’s death has been broken but in her place an Addams must die. 

            Francoise is played by Frances O’Connor, who earned a BA in Literature from Curtin University in Western Australia and graduated from the Western Australia Performing Arts Academy. She made her TV debut in the Australian series Law of the Land in 1992. She made her film debut in Love and Other Catastrophes in 1996. She starred in Kiss Or Kill, Thank God He Met Lizzie, Mercy, She co-starred in A Little Bit of Soul, About Adam, The Lazarus Child, Picadilly Jim, Go, Mansfield Park, Bedazzled (her first Hollywood film), A.I., The Importance of Being Earnest, Timeline, Book of Love, Iron Jawed Angels, Blessed, Jayne Mansfield’s Car, Little Red Wagon, The Truth About Emanuel, Three Dollars, The Hunter, The Conjuring 2, She co-starred in the series Cashmere Mafia, She co-starred in the BBC series Mr. Selfridge, The Missing. She made her film directorial debut in 1922 with Emily, which she also wrote.

Michele Lee

            On Tuesday after midnight I lint rolled the curtains between my bedroom and living room and caught some bedbugs but far fewer than the night before. I did the same to the top of my bed and none turned up. I went to bed at around 2:05. It’s too cold to sleep naked with just a sheet now so I used my comforter (which I’ve been avoiding because it’s harder to keep bedbugs out of it). I woke up around 3:00 to pee and again at 4:30, then again with the 5:00 alarm. When I checked for bedbugs dead or alive after yoga I didn’t find any. 

            I started translating “Les bienfaits de la pratique” (The Benefits of Practice) by Boris Vian. 

            I finished translating “La fille aux claquettes” (The Tap Dancing Girl) by Serge Gainsbourg. I searched for the chords but no one has posted them. AI suggested some that work but it thinks the song is in the key of C while I’m hearing F. 

            I weighed 90.95 kilos before breakfast. 

            I played my Kramer during song practice and it stayed in tune most of the time. 

            I rode up to Yonge and St Clair to get a haircut at Top Cuts. My stylist Amy was just finishing up with a big guy whose head and face she’d just shaved. Apparently he’d been very difficult before I arrived and had screamed at Amy to demand that she clip his nose hairs. He’d insisted on a soap and razor shave, which they don’t have facilities for because it’s not a barber shop. From what I could gather another customer with a Scottish accent had given him money for his cut but now she regretted it. He wanted more done but they said he was finished. He only had thirty dollars though the bill was about $45. I could tell by the way he moved that he was developmentally challenged. After he left, the other customer paid the difference on his bill. One of the hairdressers said she could have done him damage if there hadn’t been witnesses. I assume she means she knows martial arts. 

            I asked Amy to cut the sides shorter than before and to keep the front long. But when she was done the side still wasn’t as short as I wanted it. I didn't push it because she'd had a hard day. 

            I had been scheduled to meet with Brian Haddon for lunch at The Crown and Dragon after my haircut but on Sunday he canceled because he was worried about getting bedbugs. I had assured him I would take precautions and that the chances were low but he doesn’t want to get together until my place is bedbug free. That pissed me off because it could take years and it hurt that he didn’t trust me to be careful. 

            I weighed 91.1 kilos before lunch at 15:40. 

            I took a siesta and got up at around 18:00. 

            I weighed 91.5 kilos at 18:15. 

            I was a couple of days behind in my journal and worked on getting caught up. 

            I had oven fries, pork ribs and a glass of Creemore lager while watching The Carol Burnett Show 25th Anniversary Special. 

            Carol comes out and does a song about her first opening for the show 25 years ago, how she felt and what she did and makes fun of how awkward she was. 

            There’s a clip of Carol with Ronald Reagan when he was governor of California taking questions and someone asks if he’d like to live in Washington, D. C. Reagan says he can’t understand anyone wanting to live anywhere but in California. 

            A guy named Cary who as a teenager asked if he could come up and give Carol a kiss is now in the audience 15 years later and asks if he can come up again. They show the clip of how nervous he was and Carol saying she’d be gentle. After she kissed him back then he said he was going to faint. 

            Carol brings out Harvey Korman. 

            She shows a clip of Tim Conway as a soldier trying load a cannon but drops the ball down his pants. He can’t get it out so he just puts his crotch where the ball is against the cannon and signals to fire. Carol brings out Tim then she brings out Vicki Lawrence. Tim says of Vicki, “Out of all of us, who would imagine that she’d be the only one that’s still working!” Harvey says, “I was sucking up to the wrong person all those years!” 

            Carol shows a clip of Lyle Waggoner as the Marlboro man looking cool as he lights up and then having a coughing fit. 

            They show several clips of cast members getting hit over the years. 

            They show some clips of movie spoofs I never saw such as From Here to Maternity in which Steve Lawrence and Carol are on a beach making out when a big wave hits them. Pillow Squawk is a parody of Pillow Talk with Carol parodying Doris Day.

            Carol, Harvey, Vicki, Lyle, and Tim sit on chairs on stage and take questions from the audience.

            They show a clip from the butcher shop sketch in which Tim accidentally pulls Harvey’s pants down and he’s wearing briefs, having forgotten to wear boxers. He was particularly embarrassed because his idol Sir Laurence Olivier was in the audience. 

            Carol shows the clip of the horse that relieved itself behind her when she was singing. Tim says he was also peeing during that song. 

            Carol says Vicki’s daughter Courtney is at Stanford now. 

            Carol points out her three daughters in the audience. They try to get Tim’s kids to stand up and they show them sitting but a black guy stands for fun. 

            There are clips of Carol singing with Ethel Merman, Liza Minelli, Perry Como, Rita Hayworth, The Pointer Sisters (singing “Salt Peanuts” while dressed like one of the sisters), and The Carpenters.

            Carol shows how Vicki transforms into Mama with no makeup. Just the wig, the glasses, the padded dress, and the frown. 

            There’s a clip of Harvey singing in Spanish drag with very large breasts and castanets. 

            Carol has the chorus from her show take a bow and then the dancers. She gets Bob Mackie to stand up, calls him a genius, and wonders why he doesn’t get any older. She gets the choreographer Ernie Flatt and the assistant choreographer George Foster to stand up. 

            Carol comes out as the Charwoman again and sings her goodbye theme song while a few more clips of guest stars roll, such as Wayne Rogers, Dom DeLuise, Jack Palance, Penny Marshall, Sally Field, and Michelle Lee. 

           Then Carol slips into some high heels, strips off the charwoman’s rags and has an elegant sparkly gold suit on. She sings a different goodbye song. Then Vicki comes out and it’s a duet. Then Harvey sings the song with her. Then Lyle, then Tim, who talk-sings and then jokingly sings in a dramatic way. Then they all hold hands and sing it together. They go into the audience and shake hands with people while still singing. They return to the stage and Carol says goodnight to them. They each go through a different doorway, except Carol stays behind and starts singing the song alone again. But the others come back out to join her to her disappointment. She herds them all back through their doors while still singing. 

            Michelle Lee acted in plays in junior high school and in senior high she became the lead singer for the school band. In her very first audition she got the part. She made her TV debut in 1961 on The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis. Before graduating she made her Broadway debut in Vintage 60. Soon after that she began doing guest performances on popular TV variety shows such as The Danny Kaye Show. She made her film debut in How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying in 1967 after having co-starred in the play on Broadway. She co-starred in The Comic and The Love Bug. 

            She had a minor hit with the song “L. David Sloane”, which reached #52 in 1969. 

She was nominated for Tony Awards in 1974 and 2001 for her performances in Seesaw and The Tale of The Allergist’s Wife. She starred in all 344 episodes of Knots Landing (for which she was nominated for an Emmy Award) and directed nine episodes, She was the first woman to co-write, produce, direct, and star in a TV movie: Colour Me Perfect in 1996. She wrote the bestselling autobiography My Father Was a Blackbelt.

September 26, 1996: I bought a motorcycle jacket and a leather jockstrap

Thirty years ago today 

            On Thursday I went to Northbound Leather and bought a motorcycle jacket. I also bought a leather jock strap.

Julie Andrews

            On Monday after midnight I lint rolled the curtains between the bedroom and the living room and picked up several bedbugs. I also lint rolled my pillow and the top of my bed and a bedbug turned up there as well. I put some more carpet tape along the edges of my mattress where the older tape had gotten less sticky. I went to bed at around 1:30 and got to sleep after 2:00. 

            I dreamed that the whole top-right side of my teeth came out as if they were a set of dentures. I got up with the alarm at 5:00 and did my yoga.

            After yoga I checked for bedbugs and didn’t find any.

            I posted a picture on my Boris Vian fan page of Vian climbing into his Brasier Torpedo car in 1911. 

            I posted the lyrics for “Come Young Gendarmes”, my translation of “Venez donc voir” by Boris Vian on my Boris Vian fan Facebook page and on my personal Facebook page. The next Vian song on my list is “Les bienfaits de la pratique” (The Benefits of Practice) and I found the text but there is no audio available. So I’ll just translate the lyrics without memorizing them. 

            I finished memorizing “La fille aux claquettes” (The Tap Dancing Girl) by Serge Gainsbourg. On Tuesday I’ll finish revising my translation and then I’ll start working out the chords. 

            I weighed 90.85 kilos before breakfast. 

            I played my Gibson Les Paul Studio during song practice and went out of tune more than half the time. 

            I called Jamal Logan, the bylaw officer assigned to my complaint about bedbugs. I had been told by the city that he would get in touch within ten days but it was now 17 days. He said the ten day promise was very unrealistic because there is a backlog of cases and he is a month behind. He asked me to send him pictures of the bedbugs. I was disappointed to learn that he can’t force the landlord to treat the entire building and only has the power to make the landlord deal with the unit of the complaining tenant. He told me I would have to contact Rent Safe to force an inspection of the entire building. 

            I weighed 91.75 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 91.5 kilos at 18:10, which is the heaviest I’ve been in the evening since last Monday. 

            I was still a day behind in my journal and worked on getting caught up. 

            I had a potato with gravy and some pork ribs while watching a video of Carol Burnett and Julie Andrews’ opening number at Lincoln Centre in 1971; a 1978 promo for A Special Evening With Carol Burnett; a preview of The Carol Burnett Show Reunion; a Show Business Tonight countdown of Carol’s favourite sketches; and a Carol and Company backstage tour. 

            For the Carol and Julie show Ken and Mitzi Welch wrote all the music and stuff. The night before the show Carol decided it would be nice to put some highlights in her hair. She went to an all night drug store and bought a bottle of peroxide. She put a little here and there on her hair and then went to bed. The next morning her husband looked at her in shock and exclaimed, “What did you do?” She looked in the mirror and all of her hair was the colour of straw and very dry. When she went to the dress rehearsal the hairdresser exclaimed, “What did you do?” He fixed it as best as he could. 

            Carol and Julie come out in similar gowns of different colours. They say the last time they did this was at Carnegie Hall and they vowed they wouldn’t let another birthday go by before they did another show together. Carol says, “Just think, that was ten years ago.” “And here we are, both one year older.” Julie asks Carol what she’s been doing with herself all these years. “Are you still in entertainment?” “I’m on television.” “Oh, what a shame!” “What have you been doing?” “I’ve been working in motion pictures.” “Talkies?” “I went out to Hollywood to do The Sound of Music.” “Did it ever come off?” They both admit they were kidding. Carol asks Julie to “Promise you won’t cut up tonight like you did at Carnegie Hall!” “Me?” Carol begins a song about how they shouldn’t misbehave tonight. Julie joins in and sings how they must be “Ladylike tonight”. They’ll sing “Nothing cheaper than Strauss tonight”. Julie says “This means no Charwoman!” Carol says, “No Cockney!” “Try to keep your gown down tonight!” “Me? I’m the mother of three!” They are dancing and at the end of the song Carol pulls Julie’s skirt off so she’s standing in her panties before they both run off stage. 

            There’s nothing special about the 21 second promo for the 1978 special. 

            The preview just has what the reunion has, which I’ll be covering later. 

            Carol, Tim and Vicki are guests on Entertainment Tonight for the countdown of Carol’s favourite sketches. #5 is the No Frills Airline in which Tim is the only discount passenger one seat behind Harvey, who is in first class. Tim is treated like shit and somehow gets turbulence while Harvey doesn’t. Vickie says they just lucked into an amazing chemistry among really good friends. #4 is when Vicki as Mama improvised some insults about Eunice’s sanity such as, “You got splinters in the windmills of your mind!” The video I have doesn’t show #s 3, 2, and 1. 

            In the last video Carol leads a tour of Studio 33 where her show was taped 25 years before. They shot all 11 seasons there. Vickie says the studio still smells like CBS. Carol says that the cue card boys were gourmet chefs and on Thursdays they would cook meals. Lyle says the crews were amazing and they could set things up in no time. There were five cameras. The cameramen were funny guys. Pat the cameraman was often making cracks to Carol during the her question and answer segment. A little girl in the audience asked, “If he’s a smart guy how come you don’t fire him?” Carol says they had a 28 piece orchestra, which would be impossible today. Now they just use synthesizers. Vicki shows us the star dressing room. Where the flat screen TV is now there was a piano and Vicki often found Red Skelton tinkling on it because they used to share the stage with him when they first started. He listened to her whole story about how she met Carol and how she was going to be on her new show. He used to love to write music to relax and he had a piece of sheet music he was working on. He scribbled “Vicki” across the top, signed it, gave it to her and said, Good luck!” Carol says Bob Mackie made 60 to 70 costumes a week, which is also unheard of today. He would get the script for the following week on Friday night and made the costumes in his workshop outside the studio. Vicki says in 1971 Sonny and Cher premiered on the stage next door. If you wanted to find out what Cher was wearing on a given night you’d walk through the shared ladies room to the other studio. Jim Nabors, Glen Campbell, Merv Griffin, and The Smothers Brothers were all next door. Carol show the room where the writers and the producers would sit and watch the dress rehearsal while making notes. Then the cast would get the notes and make improvements for the second show at 20:00. Lyle says he used to spend a lot of time in the booth with the directors, watching them shoot the show. Carol says when Sue Vogelsanger came out of the audience to ask her to perform her song and Carol told her they’d do it next week, the people in the booth were waving frantically to try to signal her not to do it. For weeks after that they got people sending in songs but they never did it again. 

            Julie Andrews’ parents were vaudeville performers who noticed early on their daughter had a four octave singing voice and put her on stage with them in music halls throughout her childhood years and teens. She could sing notes only dogs could hear at the age of 7. She studied ballet, ballroom and tap, which gave her strong stage movement and rhythm for her later work in acting and in musicals. She made her West End debut in 1948. At age 12 she gave a royal command performance for King George VII, Queen Elizabeth (the Queen Mother), Princess Elizabeth (the future queen) and Princess Margaret. She co-starred on the radio program Educating Archie from 1950 to 1952. At the age of 20 she made her professional stage debut at the London Palladium in Cinderella, which was written for her. She made her Broadway debut in The Boyfriend in 1954. She made her television debut in High Tor in 1955. She became a star in 1956 when she played Eliza Doolittle in My Fair Lady. Her debut album was The Lass With the Delicate Air in 1957. Between 1956 and 1962 she appeared on several top variety shows, including Ed Sullivan. She made her film debut in Mary Poppins in 1964, for which she won an Academy Award. She starred in The Sound of Music (for which she also won a Grammy Award), Thoroughly Modern Millie, Star, The Tamarind Seed, Duet For One, Darling Lili, S.O.B., Victor Victoria, The Princess Diaries 1 and 2, Eloise at the Plaza, Eloise at Christmastime, Hawaii, She co-starred in The Americanization of Emily, Torn Curtain, Little Miss Marker, The Man Who Loved Women, That’s Life, 10, The Princess Diaries 2, Shrek 2, Shrek the Third, Shrek Forever After, Enchanted (as narrator), The Tooth Fairy, Despicable Me, Despicable Me 3, The King’s Daughter (as narrator), Minions, She starred in The Julie Andrews Hour (for which she won an Emmy), Julie’s Greenroom, She is the narrator for Bridgerton (for which she won an Emmy). She won $30 million when she sued over the botched throat surgery that temporarily ruined her singing voice. After recovery she sang “Your Crowning Glory” in The Princess Diaries 2. She wrote Home: A Memoir of My Early Years and The Very Fairy Princess. She won a Grammy for A Collection of Poems, Songs, and Lullabies. Queen Elizabeth made her a Dame in 1999. She has a chalet in Gstaad, Switzerland and every year she pays for the town’s Christmas lights and presents the prize in July for the Gstaad tennis open. She had a bumper sticker that read “Mary Poppins is a Junkie”. Before she met her husband Blake Edwards she heard that he’d said of her, “She’s so sweet she probably has violets between her legs.” She sent him a bouquet of violets. She’s won three Grammy Awards and three Emmy Awards.

September 25, 1996: I bought a couple of Goth shirts

Thirty years ago today

            On Wednesday I made appointments with the optometrist and the dentist. Now that I had the money from my inheritance I could afford to get some glasses and to get my teeth fixed. I also bought a couple of nice shirts at the local Goth clothing store.

September 24, 1996: Our featured poet was Phil Onious

Thirty years ago today

            On Tuesday I posed from 9:00 to 16:00 for a portrait class in room 356 at the Ontario College of Art. I went home for a while and then in the evening I went to the Gladstone Hotel to host my Orgasmic Alphabet Orgy writers open stage. Our feature that night was Phil Onious with his unique guitar tunings and his quirky songs and lyrics. He was always entertaining with his weird theories about humanity and apparently absurd claims like that he wrote all the Beatles’ sons. But I think he meant his generation wrote them.