Helena de Crespo

            On Monday I finished working out the chords for “Aéroplanes" by Serge Gainsbourg and ran through the song in English and French.

            Around midday I finished cleaning and putting back all the lake-worn bricks that I keep on the right end of my kitchen bookshelf. I put all my hand written books of poetry from the years before I had a computer back on the middle shelf and returned of my diaries from the nineties to the bottom shelf. I have always kept cookbooks on the upper shelf but I’ve decided not to keep them. I haven’t used any of them for years and so they just take up space. Any recipe I don’t invent can be found online.

            I had a can of tuna in Thai chili sauce with kettle chips for lunch.

            In the afternoon I did my exercises while listening to Amos and Andy. In the early 1950s they tended to rehash old stories but add new jokes. This one was a reworking of a story about Kingfish’s rich aunt who has a very successful business in Chicago. Her plan has always been that when she gets too old to run her business she will pass it on to the most capable of her relatives. Because of this Kingfish has always lied and told her that he is a big shot businessman in New York. But new his aunt has decided to visit and so Kingfish has to make it appear to her that he’s high society. He has her over for dinner with Andy pretending to be a high class guest. But she asks Kingfish why if Andy is sophisticated he eats with his napkin tied around his neck. Kingfish explains that Andy is a surgeon and since they are having liver that night he starts thinking that he’s operating on someone. In the end the aunt learns that Kingfish is not what he says he is and so she goes back to Chicago. We learn however that she is not rich and does not own a business after all but rather works in a laundry.

            The funniest gag comes from a conversation that Kingfish has with Calhoun the lawyer. Calhoun says he’s just come from court and Kingfish asks about the case. Calhoun relates that he was driving his car and he didn’t see the man on the crosswalk. He hit him and knocked him fifteen meters in the air and so he said he was in court suing him. Kingfish asks, "If you knocked him fifteen meters in the air, on what grounds are you suing him?” Calhoun answers, “For leaving the scene of an accident."

            For dinner I had a potato, a carrot, some ribs and some gravy while watching two episodes of The Adventures of Robin Hood.

            The first story features the return of the elderly Jewish physician Joseph of Cordoba. He comes to Sherwood with his young travelling companion, Esther seeking the help of Robin Hood. Robin finds them and invites them back in camp. He learns that Joseph had been in York until the riots started.

This show jumps around a bit in Medieval history but the riots he refers to in York would probably be the 1190 Massacre during which the entire Jewish community of York, an estimated 150 people, were killed. The religious fervour that sent Christians to fight Muslims in the Crusades also manifested itself as aggression against Jews throughout western Europe. Prominent among those attacking the Jews in England was Richard Malebisse, who owed money to Jews and wanted to cancel his debt by cancelling the Jews. The Jews of York were officially royal vassals of King Richard and so they barricaded themselves in the wooden keep of the royal castle. As the mob were storming the castle, many of the Jews that were not murdered, killed their own families and then themselves to avoid being murdered or forced conversion by the mob. King Richard gave the city a heavy fine but the instigators escaped punishment.

Joseph and Esther are carrying a thousand crowns to pay the captain of a ship carrying Jewish refugees. The boat will be arriving in Grimsby in four days. Joseph is slightly injured from a sword wound and so Robin and Little John decide to accompany Esther to Grimsby. In this story Malebisse is slightly fictionalized into a character named Malbete and we see him trying to get the Sheriff of Nottingham to help him stop the refugees from arriving. The sheriff says that refugees pay their taxes and anyone that does that is welcome in his shire. But when Malebisse tells the sheriff of the thousand crowns he is willing to help Malebete for a share of the loot by sending three men at arms along with him. They plan to ambush Joseph and Esther on the Lincoln Road but Robin suspects this and sends their unmounted horse running ahead. Malebete assumes they have taken a different road and looks for them elsewhere. When they get to Lincoln they find Malbete is there but they escape after a tussle with a couple of soldiers whose hearts are not quite in the fight anyway. As they head for the coast they stop at a tavern where some of Esther’s friends provide horses and tell them that the refugees will be coming ashore at St Catharine’s Cove outside of Grimsby. They make it to the beach and see the rowboats carrying the refugees ashore from the ship.

The whole idea of a ship captain taking payment after delivering refugees seems unrealistic. I would think he would want the money in the first place.

Malbete and his four soldiers go towards the refugees but Robin shouts that he has the treasure and so they turn for him. Little John, Esther, an old sailor and some of the refugees defeat the soldiers. Robin kills Malbete.

Esther was played by Helena de Crespo, who was born in Spain but raised and educated in England. She was trained at the Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts under a full scholarship. She acted in theatre, film and television and then taught drama art several universities in Latin America. She’s won many awards in Britain and Latin America. She also founded an organization called Save World Art to help preserve indigenous art forms under the threat of extinction.

In the second story the Count of Severne tells the sheriff that he suspects Lady Marian of being in league with Robin Hood. The sheriff always refuses to believe such things about Marian. Severne proposes that they borrow a baby and leave it in Sherwood Forest. He is certain that the outlaws will find it and ask Marian to take care of it. When they catch her with the baby they will have proof that Marian supports the outlaws. Severne wagers a hundred crowns that he is right and so the sheriff calls the bet. The sheriff knows that his man Giles has just become a father because he paid the birth tax last month. He explains that the birth tax keeps soldiers from having large families which make them overly cautious and therefore poor soldiers. The sheriff forces Giles to let him borrow his baby or lose his post. Friar Tuck meets Kate, the distraught mother and learns that the baby has been taken. The little girl is placed in the forest and a pile of leaves is made and set aflame nearby. The smoke attracts the outlaws and they find the baby. The men fall all over themselves to take care of the baby but Robin says they can’t keep her. He sends for Marian who says she will take her to Fitzwalter Hall and care for her while she looks for her parents. Severne and the sheriff and his men are waiting to stop Marian on the road. Meanwhile Tuck arrives at the outlaw camp and hears about the baby. He realizes this must be the baby that had been taken from Kate and Giles an d figures out that this must have been a trap for Marian all along. Robin, Little John and Derwent cut through the woods to head Marian off and warn her. But two of the sheriff’s men stop her first and want to see what’s in the basket attached to her saddle. Before the soldier can look in the basket Marian pretends to be faint and says she needs some wine. The soldier says he’ll take her to the Blue Boar. Robin and his men hear this and go ahead to the inn. Marian is taken inside but one of the guards stays with the basket. Suddenly he hears a baby give a slight cry and goes to look in the basket. At that moment Alison the barmaid distracts him by bringing him a mug of ale. Then they have a long kiss while Robin goes to the basket. Marian is taken to the Sheriff of Nottingham and the basket is opened to reveal Alison’s kitten. The sheriff wins the money from but Marian insists he give it to her, which he does with no reluctance. Marian gives the money to Kate, who has already gotten her baby back.

Alison was played by Sylvia Kay who was pursuing a psychology degree when she took up acting. Se played Daphne Warrender on the British sitcom “Just Good Friends” and the landlady in the series “Rooms”. When she was in her sixties she completes her degree and became a psychotherapist.