Johnny Haymer

            On Monday morning I continued collecting images for my photo-video of “Les millionaires”. I have 163 so far. 

            I weighed 91.05 kilos before breakfast, which is the heaviest I’ve been in the morning since February 21. 

            I played my Kramer electric during song practice and it stayed in tune pretty much the whole session. Tomorrow I’ll begin a two session stretch of playing my Martin acoustic. 

            Around midday I finished painting with “blue bliss” the underside of my lower bathroom shelf and added a first coat to the trim between north wall and the wall tiles below. I might have all the trim done on Friday, and after that I’ll start of the door and the door frame.

            I weighed 91.6 kilos before lunch. That’s the unkindest I’ve been to the scale in the early afternoon since February 20. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. I stopped at Metro in the Annex to buy five vine ripened tomatoes. 

            I weighed 90.7 kilos at 18:30, the same as last Monday evening. 

            I was caught up in my journal at 19:08. 

            I recorded from cassette tape through audio interface to Audacity and then extracted to my hard drive a recording of Steve Lowe and I rehearsing my songs “Angeline” twice and “Calendar Girl” once. Steve was very proud of his guitar playing on “Angeline”. This was side two of the tape that I started copying yesterday and which contained on the other side my performance of Rocky Capano’s song and also of my own song “Me and Gravity”. 

            I made some more sub-folders for photos in my SSD and deleted several more images from my hard drive. 

            I steamed some broccoli and had it in a salad with two tomatoes, two avocadoes, a scallion, and lime-miso salad dressing. I ate it while watching episode 3 of Captain Nice. 

            While stopping two burglars from breaking into a jewellery store Captain Nice accidentally and unknowingly spills his super power serum. He doesn’t notice it’s missing until the next morning and then he goes back to the jewellery store. There is a small hole in the glass window of the store with some threads around it. Then he hears the police say the entire Garden of Eden Botanical Nursery has been stolen and he goes along with them as police chemist Carter Nash to investigate. He finds the same silk threads at the nursery and concludes that the nursery wasn’t stolen but rather eaten, perhaps by some kind of animal. 

            Carter and Sergeant Candy Cane go to see the animal expert Dr. Von Keppel at the zoo. Carter says he knows he’s been studying animals all his life. The doctor says “longer than that”. He says animals are his main love and then he shoos away a pigeon from his window and expresses how disgusting they are. Keppel says animals should be allowed to roam freely and anyone who disagrees with that should be in jail. 

            While they are there they see an elephant has been knocked unconscious. Inside the nearby food storage building they hear the sounds of eating and a great roar. Carter goes inside and then comes back out in shock. He says it was a caterpillar. The little monster has already consumed the produce of six supermarkets and trees are falling all around. The army starts bombing it but it has no effect. Carter says it will soon turn into a moth. 

            Carter builds a caterpillar lure that reproduces the sound of lettuce. He activates it in the park, then turns into Captain Nice. He tries to fight the unseen monster but it tosses him away easily. Then Nice feeds his serum to his mother’s pet parakeet Sheldon and the bird eats the caterpillar. Now Sheldon is missing and several hundred kilos of birdseed have disappeared from the grainery. 

            Dr. Von Keppel was played by Johnny Haymer, who portrayed Sergeant Zelmo Zale on twenty episodes of M.A.S.H. He was the voice if the Decepticon Swindle in the Transformers. He guest starred in “All Our Yesterdays”, the penultimate episode of the original Star Trek series. He co-starred on Madame’s Place. He did TV commercials for Standard Shoes.