Roy Stuart

            On Saturday at around 0:30 I was making my bed before getting in it when I found a bedbug on my bottom sheet. When they're out in the open like that without a food source they're trying to reach it tends to mean they aren't well. It was also just sitting there and not trying to get anyplace. When I picked it up and crushed it there was no fresh blood inside, just like the one that I found on Wednesday. That makes seven that I've found since Friday August 13 and it's been a week since I found any with fresh blood inside. The last two seemed to be dying, so that's a good sign. 

            I worked out the chords for most of "Bébé Polaroid" by Serge Gainsbourg except for the finale. I should have it done and uploaded to Christian's Translations tomorrow. 

            In the late morning I went to No Frills. The cherries weren't cheap but they were Canadian so I bought four bags. I also got a pint of blueberries, a basket of peaches, a watermelon, a strawberry rhubarb pie, dental floss, Greek yogourt and skyr. 

            Once I'd put my stuff away I went went back out to the liquor store to buy a six pack of Creemore. On my way in I met my neighbour Benji on his way out. He said he wished he could still drink beer but can't now because of medication he needs to take. He said he thinks the guy on the third floor in number 6 finally moved out. 

            I weighed 89.1 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride. A few months ago three restaurants along Bloor between Brock and Ossington put up covid patios that the bike lane was rerouted to detour around. The one just before Ossington had a very short turn and so cyclists had to slow down to get around it. I always wondered if there had been any crashes into the posts. A couple of weeks ago I discovered that they lengthened the turn so we didn't have to slow down anymore, so I assume there had been accidents. I rode to Yonge and Bloor and it was a sweaty ride there and home again. I weighed 88.5 kilos when I got back. 

            I worked on my poem series "My Blood In A Bug." 

            I searched for video clips to match the line, "Undress the patient and then lay them down just like a sacrifice." But the word "undress" tends to lead any search to porn. I narrowed it down to "psychiatric patient as sacrifice" but didn't find anything obvious. I found a list of old movies about asylums. I'll try again tomorrow. This is not the kind of thing I can shoot myself because I would need actors and a set, so I have to keep looking. 

            I worked on making the graffiti clearer in my "Anti Gravity's Rainbow" photo.

            I grilled four beef burgers and had one between two pieces of bread topped by ketchup, mustard, pickles and peri peri sauce. I had it with a beer while watching two episodes of Gomer Pyle. 

            The first story is the last one that takes place on the navy ship. While Carter is demonstrating how to punch Gomer with boxing gloves, Chief Petty Officer Simpson steps in and says he's not doing it right and shows him how to punch Gomer. The rivalry between the two non-commissioned officers comes to a head and Simpson challenges Carter to a boxing match. Since Carter was his high school champion his men are confident that he can beat Simpson and decide to place some bets. But when they go to bet with the sailors under Simpson they learn that he was fleet champion with a lot of knockouts. Then they see him train and realize he could kill Carter. When they try to warn him he won't listen and so they decide to use psychological warfare against Simpson. They surprise the sailors by claiming Carter is a four to one favourite. Then they stage a training camp behind closed doors and show sparring partners leaving with makeup to make them look like they've been beaten. The sailors can hear the bag being punched with machine gun rapidity but on the other side three men are punching it. When Carter hears what the men are doing to protect him he is moved and says he now has the confidence to beat Simpson. But the day of the fight Simpson knocks Carter out with his first punch. 

            In the second story Gomer is in a diner looking out the window when he sees an accident. Carter's car hits another car from behind. Gomer sees the whole thing and wants to go out and help but the waiter has a hard time with the pricing and the math of Gomer's bill. By the time she's done Carter and Cummings have exchanged information and Carter has left. When Cummings hears Gomer say he saw the whole thing he asks him to be a witness in court. Cummings sues Carter. When Carter learns Gomer is a witness Corporal Boyle warns Carter that this could be Gomer's chance to get back at him for all the ridicule since boot camp. Carter begins to try to butter Gomer up and when that doesn't work he tries to make it so he's not there the day of the court case. But Gomer comes and takes the stand. What Gomer's testimony reveals is that Carter was at fault for speeding but Cummings was at fault because he didn't signal before stopping suddenly and he also was trying to make a left turn from the right lane. The judge warns both men that if anything involving them comes before him again they will lose their licenses. 

            The waiter was played by Allison McKay. 

            Boyle was played by Roy Stuart who performed in nightclubs, acted in theatre, film and television. He made guest appearances on several popular shows. He appeared in over 100 commercials in the 1970s.