Alan Napier

            On Saturday morning I sang and played "Fugue" by Boris Vian. Tomorrow I'll run through singing and playing my translation to hear if everything's okay before uploading it to Christian's Translations. 

            I finished working out the chords for "Hmm hmm hmm" by Serge Gainsbourg and ran through singing and playing it in French and English. I uploaded it to Christian's Translations and began the editing process to publish it on the blog. I should have that on Sunday. 

            I weighed 83.7 kilos before breakfast. 

            In the late morning I went to No Frills where I bought seven bags of grapes, a pack of strawberries, a pack of blueberries, some bananas, a case of ataulfo mangoes, two packs of grape tomatoes, a couple of clusters of vine tomatoes, two English cucumbers, a bunch of scallions, a bottle of Garden Cocktail, and a jug of orange juice. It came out to $100 and change. 

            I tried to work on my essay but was feeling sleepy and actually dozed off in front of the computer for a full fifteen minutes. I only managed to jot a few thoughts down: 

            Beneath the surface is ugliness. Beneath the surface Victor can see "the work of muscles and arteries". He can see the inside moving, the blood flowing, the muscles flexing. He can see life but it looks like death to him. 

            I weighed 83.7 kilos before lunch. I had avocadoes, grape tomatoes, cucumber, and a scallion with a glass of Garden Cocktail. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride to Bloor and Bathurst. I wore my long underwear and an extra sweatshirt for the first time in a couple of weeks. 

            I weighed 83.9 kilos at 17:00. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 17:56. 

            I spent almost two hours on my essay and did some writing but mostly researched the names that Victor Frankenstein calls his creature after he finds out that he murdered his brother. I wanted to see if there is a difference in the weight of language between what Victor calls the creature based on appearance and the names he uses after the violence: 

            The surface of the creature appears as the inside of a human. Victor can see "the work of muscles and arteries". He can see the inside moving, the blood flowing, the muscles flexing. He can see the dynamic pulsations of life but they look like death to him and therefore they are ugly. From the time of the creature's first animation until he suspects him of murder, Victor has only aesthetic criteria on which to judge his creation's inner character. But the virulent language that Victor uses is stronger before he learns that the creature killed his six year old brother. Based entirely on his appearance he calls the creature a "wretch", a "miserable monster", a "demoniacal corpse", and a "filthy daemon". After William's murder he calls the creature an "animal", a "wretch" several times (but Victor also calls himself a wretch which diminishes the power of the insult), a "devil", a "vile insect", a "fiend" many times, a "daemon" many times, "ghastly", a "monster" often, and refers to his "unparalleled barbarity". 

            I had avocados, tomatoes, scallion, cucumber and lemon juice with a glass of Garden Cocktail. I added some hot pepper sauce to the Garden Cocktail because it is getting boring. This is the last meal of the ninth day of my fast and there are five days to go. I ate while watching season 6, episode 2 of The Beverly Hillbillies. 

            The Clampetts are on the plane to London from Los Angeles. When the plane lands Jethro tells his family they are in London and so they jump in a cab and go on a tour. But they are not in London. The plane landed briefly in San Francisco. The taxi takes them to Twin Peaks where Jethro tells them that the Golden Gate Bridge is the London Bridge, the cliffs they see are the cliffs of Dover, the land in the distance is France, Alcatraz is one of the British Isles. The cabby finally points out to them that they are in San Francisco and so they head back to the airport, where fortunately their plane is still there. They are now really on their way to London and the flight attendant offers them dinner. Jethro tells her he's the royal taster but before Jed, Granny and Elly can be fed they run out of food because Jethro has gone through twelve steak dinners. When they get off the plane they are met by Cedric-Giles Evans who tells them he represents the law firm that is handling the estate of Jed's late cousin Marcus. Jed thinks he means Marcus is late to meet them at the plane. Cedric clarifies that he's deceased but Jed thinks he means diseased and says it's a good thing Granny's a doctor. Granny asks if Marcus is at the castle. Cedric tries to further explain that Marcus has been laid to rest but Granny thinks he's resting in bed. She asks if his family doctor is with him and Cedric says, "Madame, the gentleman is dead." But Granny thinks he means Cedric's doctor is dead. Cedric says they have to go through British customs but they think he means the other kind of customs and they begin imitating all of his gestures. 

            At British customs Granny refuses to open her suitcase but the inspector insists. When he picks up Granny's bloomers she tells him to call a preacher because now that he's touched her untouchables they have to get married. He finds her medical bag full of old time medicines like a buckeye, snake wort, dogbane, horsemint, skunk oil, wahoo, buck brush, jimson weed, spider web, and cattail. He finds her jug and she says it's Tennessee tranquilizer. They impound all of Granny's medicines and so the Clampetts go looking for a drug store so she can replenish her supply. Jed and Granny go to the chemist's while Jethro and Elly go to Buckingham Palace. Granny lists for the chemist the items that were confiscated and adds eye of newt. He smiles and says, "You're one of those doctors. Let me see if I can remember the formula from Macbeth. Eye of newt and toe of frog, wing of bat, and tongue of dog, adder's fork." Granny says to Jed, "Now there's a druggist!" He says he prides himself on his Shakespeare. Granny says, "If you recommend it I'll take some. How do you sell your Shakespeare over here?" He says, "By the volume, the play and the sonnet". She says, "I'll take half a sonnet." He recites some love sonnets and Granny thinks he's courting her. He's turning her head and she's forgotten why she came in. Jed has to carry her away. 

            At Buckingham Palace Jethro dumps a bucket of water on the pavement in front of the gate, then throws his coat on top to get the Queen's attention like he thinks Sir Walter Raleigh did. That doesn't work so they head back and pick up Jed and Granny. They are now all on their way to the castle.

            The chemist was played by Alan Napier, who was a cousin of Neville Chamberlain. He studied at the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art and upon graduation worked for the Oxford Repertory Theatre for ten years. He came to the United States in 1939 to work in movies and later on television. He co-starred in Orson Welles's Macbeth. he played General Steele on the short-lived sitcom Don't Call Me Charlie. He's best known for playing Bruce Wayne's butler Alfred on the Batman TV series in the 1960s. He was married to Aileen "Gypsy" Dickens Bouchier Hawksley, the great granddaughter of Charles Dickens. Shortly before the Batman TV series premiered, the comic book killed off Alfred and introduced Aunt Harriet. But Napier's Alfred was so popular that the comic brought Alfred back. He wrote an autobiography entitled "Not Just Batman's Butler" but it wasn't published until 27 years after he died. 

            

            

            I haven't found a bedbug for fifteen days.