Brendan Fraser

            On Saturday morning I finished working out the chords for the first verse of "Sermonette" by Boris Vian. There are two long verses and so I'm halfway done, and I doubt if the chords for the second verse are different from the first. 

            I memorized the third verse of "Volontaire" by Serge Gainsbourg and finished reworking my translation. 

            I weighed 84.9 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday, I headed down to No Frills where I bought five bags of Black Sable grapes, a pack of strawberries, a basket of peaches, and a pack of blueberries. The watermelons were cheap, but I couldn't find one that I thought was a good one. I got a sack of potatoes, a pack of chicken drumsticks, a strawberry-rhubarb pie, honey, and skyr. 

            I weighed 85.3 kilos before lunch. I had tomato and five-year-old cheddar on toasted Bavarian sandwich bread with a glass of limeade. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 84.2 kilos at 17:00. 

            Since I didn't catch up on my journal the night before, I wasn't caught up today until 19:35. 

            I reviewed two videos of me playing "L'accordion" and three of "The Accordion". But actually, there was only one video of "L'accordion" because on June 8, which was a day when I sing in French, I forgot to sing it. On June 10 my performance was okay but I almost fumbled a chord. For "The Accordion", on June 9, 11, and 13 I wasn't enunciating the chorus clearly enough when I sang "in and" so it sounds like "inner". 

            I made pizza on a slice of Bavarian sandwich bread with Basilica sauce and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching the 2003 movie Looney Toons Back in Action. This film mixes live action with animation in an attempt to capture the appeal of "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?" but in the form of a silly spy thriller. In some ways, it was quite entertaining and there certainly was non-stop action, but it was a bit of a jumble. 

            D.J. Drake is a struggling stuntman who works as a security guard at Warner Brothers. He could get into movies more easily with the help of his father who is a famous and powerful movie star because of his role as a superspy in a popular film series. But D.J. doesn't want his father's help. 

            Warner Brothers is shooting another Bugs Bunny movie co-starring Daffy Duck, but Daffy is tired of playing the stooge to the rabbit. He demands his own feature or else he walks and so Kate Houghton, the vice president in charge of comedy fires him. She orders D.J. to escort Daffy off the property. D.J. says, "But this is Daffy Duck!" She says, "Not any more. We own the name." Daffy tries to say his own name but can't. D.J. chases Daffy all over the studio through several sets and wrecks a Batman scene. D.J. gets fired. 

            There's a scene in the cafeteria in which the cartoon version of Shaggy from Scooby-Doo is telling Matthew Lillard who played a live-action version of Shaggy in two movies, what a bad portrayal he did of him. 

            Kate is talking with Bugs about how to spice up his movie without Daffy. She says he needs a leading lady, but Bugs says he usually plays his own leading lady. She says that cross-dressing used to be funny but now it's disturbing. Bugs says, "If you don't think a rabbit in lipstick is funny, we have nothing to say to each other." Bugs tells her he wants Daffy back. 

            D.J. goes home and it turns out that he lives next door to Granny, Tweety, and Silvester. When he gets inside, he takes off his backpack and Daffy pops out. When Daffy finds out that D.J. is Damian Drake's son he suggests that Damian played a fictional superspy as a cover for being a real superspy. Suddenly D.J.'s TV remote starts ringing. He pushes the "on" button and a painting of his father opens to reveal a video screen. His father reveals that he really is a spy and he's about to be captured. He tells D.J. to come to Las Vegas and ask Dusty Tails for The Blue Monkey. At that point he is captured. 

            D.J. heads for Vegas in his beat-up old economy car. As soon as he leaves the garage the floor flips to reveal his father's TVR Tuscan Speed Six spy car. 

            When the chief executives see that the movie won't work without Daffy, Kate is told that if she doesn't have Daffy back by Monday, she is fired. 

            On the way to Vegas, Daffy doesn't believe it when D.J. says he's a stuntman. D.J. says, "You know those Mummy movies? I'm in them more than Brendan Fraser is." The joke is that D.J. is being played by Brendan Fraser. 

            Meanwhile D.J. is being tracked by a satellite of the ACME corporation. The evil chairman is played in an over-the-top performance by Steve Martin. 

            Kate goes to D.J.'s house to look for Daffy. She hears someone in the shower and pulls back the curtain to show Bugs Bunny playing the part of Janet Leigh in the shower death scene in Psycho. Bugs tells Kate that D.J. and Daffy are on their way to Las Vegas. They get in the Tuscan, and it starts heading for Vegas by itself. Bugs pushes the auto-valet button and robot arms come out of the dashboard to dress Bugs and Kate in formal wear. 

            Dusty Tails has her own show in Vegas. D.J. knows her because she's a friend of his father. In her dressing room, she reveals that she is also a spy. She was supposed to give her father a card that looks like the queen of diamonds. They are attacked by Yosemite Sam and his men who all work for ACME. D.J. has to fight some cartoon thugs. The playing card goes flying below into the casino and lands in an automatic card shuffler. D.J. has to play blackjack and say "hit me" until the card turns up. D.J. and Daffy get into D.J.'s car but it falls apart. 

            Sam commandeers a racing car while D.J. and Daffy run. Suddenly Daffy gets hit by Damian's car and they all get in with D.J. driving. There is a ridiculous car chase with impossible manoeuvres. They are speeding towards a wall when suddenly the car starts to fly, and Sam hits the wall. The car flies over and out of Vegas but begins to crash. It stops just before it hits the ground. Bugs says they are out of gas. Kate says, "It doesn't work like that!" and suddenly the car crashes. Bugs says, "Thanks toots!" 

            They camp overnight in the desert and the next day they find a Walmart in the middle of nowhere. They get free beverages for saying "Walmart" a lot in the movie. 

            The chairman calls ACME's desert operative who is in the middle of chasing the Roadrunner when the phone rings on a cactus. Wile E Coyote orders a missile launcher from ACME, and it instantly lands on top of him. He fires the missile at the heroes, but the missile returns to him and explodes. 

            D.J. walks through an invisible barrier in the desert and it's a secret facility belonging to his father's organization. They all go in and an intruder alert is signaled. A three eyed monster attacks them as well as guards with electric rods. Daffy is hit and turned into cartoon soup. But then the person in charge called Mother calls them off. She seems a bit ditzy but says she's known D.J. since he was very small. She sucks up Daffy into a tube and says they can reconstitute the body, but the mind will remain a gooey mess. There are the bodies of aliens in tubes and on operating tables all over. Bugs says, "This is area 51, right?" Mother says, "Area 51 is a paranoid fantasy we created to hide the identity of this facility, which is Area 52." 

            D.J. asks about the Blue Monkey diamond and learns that it has supernatural powers. It can turn people into monkeys and back again. The Chairman wants it so he can turn everyone into monkeys then make them slaves in factories to manufacture ACME products, then turn them human again so they can buy the stuff. 

            Mother gives D.J. a phone with several spy features like a grappling hook. She also gives him rocket pants. She tells D.J. that the meaning of the queen of diamonds card with the face of the Mona Lisa that he has is "the window into what lies behind her smile." 

            Marvin the Martian receives a mission from the chairman to kill the duck. He breaks out of his containment in Area 52 and frees the other alien prisoners, many of which look like aliens from movies and TV shows such as Doctor Who. D.J. and his friends are attacked, and Marvin tries to get the playing card but Daffy grabs it. The heroes escape back into the desert. 

            Daffy gives back the card and they ponder its meaning, concluding they have to go to Paris. Daffy asks, "How are we supposed to get to Paris?" and Bugs reaches down to the left-hand corner of the screen to peel it back and says, "Like this" and they are suddenly in Paris. 

            At the Louvre, D.J discovers that there is a film on the surface of the playing card. He peels it off and it is an x-ray window that shows when they look through it what is behind the Mona Lisa. There is a map of Africa underneath and so they take a picture while Daffy keeps jumping up in front of the camera because he wants to take the picture. Suddenly they are confronted by Elmer Fudd and his shotgun. Bugs asks, "What gives? We made thirty-five pictures together!" Elmer says, "It turns out I'm secretly evil, so turn over the playing card!" Bugs starts distracting Elmer with a card trick. Elmer chases Bugs and Daffy through the museum. 

            While D.J. and Kate are watching, one of the chairman's thugs grabs Kate from behind. 

            Elmer chases Bugs and Daffy into Salvador Dali's "The Persistence of Memory" painting and they all become surreal animated figures in what's really the best part of the movie. Then they run into Edvard Munch's "The Scream", then into one of Toulouse Lautrec's paintings where Bugs and Daffy become can-can dancers and keep kicking Elmer. Then they run around in a Manet painting. Finally, Bugs gives the definition of Pointillism and then holds up a fan to blow the points that make up Elmer Fudd away. 

            The thug carries Kate in a sack to the Eiffel Tower but when D.J. tells the nearest gendarme, who happens to be Pepe le Pew, he responds, "It is spring, is it not?" D.J. tries to fly with the rocket pants but they take off without him, leaving him in his underwear. At the top of the tower, the thug takes Kate's camera with the picture of the painting and climbs up the ladder hanging from a helicopter. She jumps and hangs on to him. Kate falls and D.J. dives off the tower after her, obviously knowing how to shape his body to minimize resistance. because he catches up to her. He uses the grappling hook from his phone and they swing down to land at a cafe table. 

            At ACME the chairman looks at the picture of the map leading to the Blue Monkey but Daffy's face is in the middle of the map. The chairman releases his most vicious operative, the Tasmanian Devil, who eats one of his executives. 

            D.J. and his friends are cutting through the African jungle when they see an elephant, and riding it are Granny, Tweety, and Silvester. She offers them a lift and Bugs says, "It sure was a lucky coincidence, you showing up just now!" Granny says cryptically, "Yes, wasn't it?" She drops them off and they arrive at some ancient ruins where they find a tiny Blue Monkey figure but no diamond. Kate says it's a puzzle piece and fits it into an idol and turns an ancient dial. A stairway descends and a giant idol of a monkey rises up on which is the Blue Monkey diamond. D.J. picks it up and is turned into a monkey. Daffy holds the diamond and changes him back. Suddenly Granny is there with Silvester, and she tells D.J. to hand over the diamond. Then she unzips her disguise and is the Chairman, as Silvester is the thug from the Eiffel Tower. Then Tweety unzips and he's the Tasmanian Devil. Then the chairman unzips to reveal he's D.J.'s father, then other figures, and then himself again. 

            They are all teleported to ACME where the chairman shows that D.J.'s father is tied to a railroad track with TNT all around him and an anvil hanging over his head. D.J. gives the chairman the diamond but he doesn't release his father. The chairman gives the diamond to Marvin and tells him to take it to the satellite. Daffy follows Marvin in another spaceship. He thinks he's being heroic alone but suddenly Bugs reveals he's on board. During the chase, Bugs and Daffy send out a robot arm to key Marvin's ship. 

            D.J. and Kate are tied near where D.J's father is tied. They unravel their bonds, but a giant robot dog stands between D.J. and rescuing his dad. 

            Bugs's carrot turns into a light saber, and he fights Marvin on the satellite. Daffy is at first cowering in fear and asks, "What would Duck Dodgers do? Wait a minute, I am Duck Dodgers!" Suddenly he is wearing the Duck Dodgers costume. 

            D.J. is finally able to illude the dog and rescue his father. 

            Marvin encloses Bugs in a bubble and engages the diamond in the satellite. But before the ray can fire at the Earth, Daffy throws his own beak over it, causing an overload. Bugs sticks his finger in Marvin's bubble gun, and it backfires. Daffy saves Bugs from falling. One blast from the diamond hits only the chairman and he is turned into a monkey. Bugs and Daffy's ship crashes into the window of the ACME building where D.J., Kate, and Damian are. Bugs tells Daffy he achieved his goal of being the hero. Daffy tells Bugs he didn't achieve his goal of getting him to co-star in his movie, but suddenly it's revealed it was a Bugs Bunny movie all along. 

            D.J. confronts Brendan Fraser and punches him out. 

            Brendan Fraser was born in the States but also has Canadian citizenship because his father was a Canadian citizen. Brendan attended Upper Canada College in Toronto and later graduated from the Cornish College of the Arts in Seattle. His first starring role was in Encino Man in 1992. He co-starred with Adam Sandler and Steve Buscemi in Airheads. His first hit film was George of the Jungle. His acting was praised by critics in the 1998 film Gods and Monsters. His biggest successes were The Mummy and The Mummy Returns. In 2000 he co-starred with Elizabeth Hurley in Bedazzled. He co-starred with Michael Caine in The Quiet American and he was part of the ensemble cast of Crash. He is the first US-born actor to be inducted into Canada's Walk of Fame. He starred in the third Mummy movie "Tomb of the Dragon Emperor", "Journey to the Centre of the Earth", and "Inkheart". He co-starred in a West End Production of "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof". He played an Elvis impersonator in "Pawn Shop Chronicles". On TV he was in the cast of "The Affair" and "Trust". He played Robotman in "Titans" and "Doom Patrol". He played Firefly in the recently canceled "Batgirl" movie. I was only able to write about half the movie before going to bed. 

            I searched for bedbugs and found none for the third night in a row. If I find none tonight, I will have broken the pattern for the first time in months.