Sunday, 3 May 2020

Food Bank Adventures: Catching a Break But with No Brakes



            On Saturday morning I finished working out the chords for “L'homme à la tête de chou" (The Man with the Head of Cabbage) by Serge Gainsbourg. I couldn't post it on Christian's Translations yet because I still had to fine tune the rhymes. The scheme is unusual for English songs, as it goes: abaababbaabbababbabaababaaba. Gainsbourg does this kind of rhyming a lot in which only two sounds throughout the song are rhymed in various combinations. Of course it’s easier in French because there are hundreds of common words that easily rhyme.
            I worked on my journal.
            At 9:38 I left for the food bank but as soon as I got on my bike I felt the back wheel wobbling. I stopped and saw that my rear tire was not only flat but that the tube was sticking out. I took it back upstairs, grabbed my spare bike and pumped up the tires and then rode that instead. I didn’t realize until I got to the stoplight that the brakes were gone on my back-up bike. I had to use my feet to stop myself from running into a pedestrian. A block away from the food bank I made sure I was going slow so I could stop more easily. It wasn’t very graceful but I managed.
            As soon as I got off the bike I saw that they were already giving out the food. I didn’t even bother to lock my bike. I just leaned it against the bike post and walked to the end of the line where the woman with the hennaed hair was there with a cart containing boxes of food. I showed her my membership card and she wrote me down. She was arguing with the middle aged blonde regular, who declared, “I’m the victim here!” I asked if I could take a box of food from the cart and she said I could, plus the big paper back that was there as well. I asked if they would be starting this early from now on and she said, “We just started early because of this.” I asked what had happened but she just shook her head in such a way as to indicate that she didn’t want to talk about it and then she pushed the cart back to the food bank.
            I asked the blonde woman what had happened and she explained that she used to volunteer at the food bank but her year was finished recently. I guessed that she had volunteered to get the extra $100 a month that Social Services pays out for a while to clients that volunteer. She said that recently the Second Harvest truck had delivered some food and as usual some of it was bad and so Valdene, the food bank manager had put the bad stuff out on the curb to be recycled. The blonde woman told me that the woman with hennaed hair has always had it in for Valdene and had made a video of the food that she’d thrown out to send to the board, with the result that Valdene was fired. So now the woman with hennaed hair is in charge. I pointed out that she has been there for years longer than Valdene. I assume that this video was shot weeks ago but the issue this time seemed to be that the blonde woman had been in the video and she’d let the new manager know that she didn’t appreciate it. That’s all I got from it but there might be something I got wrong or parts of the story that are incomplete because what happened weeks ago didn’t really explain why the food bank gave out food early, although I was sure glad that they did.
            I gave the blonde woman my envelopes of instant oatmeal and taco spices, as well as a few other things. She took them because she said there are guys that don’t have any food in the rooming house where she lives.
            Of the food that would normally be on the wire shelves downstairs I got another bag of jalapeno whole grain chips, a box of Romano cheese flavoured Triscuits, a can of mixed beans, a tin of peas, a jar of garlic and onion pasta sauce and a 900 gram bag of cavatappi. Cavatappi is a kind of spiral macaroni with three twists in each piece. “Cavatappi” is the Italian word for “corkscrew”.
            Of the refrigerated foods I received a package of fourteen frozen breakfast sausages, which I found out later had maple flavouring. I also got three eggs and carton of 3.5% milk.
            The paper bag contained ten potatoes, seven carrots four small onions, a red pepper, three apples, three kiwis, a 227 gram pack of sliced crimini mushrooms, a seedless cucumber and a pomegranate.
            I packed up all my food and was out of there just a little after 10:00. It would be nice if it happened that way every time.
            I had to brake with my feet three times on the way home and overshot my place by three metres, almost losing my balance when I braked.
            When I got home I set about to resituating the inner tube under my back tire and pumping it up. I put my food away and then talked with my next door neighbour Benji for a while. He told me that the variety two doors up the street was robbed yesterday by a guy with a knife. But he was recorded on video and picked up by the cops an hour later.
            By the time I was ready to ride to the supermarket my tire was still firm and so I was able to ride a bike with brakes to get to No Frills.
            There was a line-up of about ten people. A woman who wasn’t in line approached the security guard, said she was a front line worker, showed her identification and got to go in ahead of the line. Her friend, a big, loud and aggressive woman whom I recognized from the food bank, waited outside with their dogs. While she was waiting and smoking she asked the security guard what company he was with. He answered that he wasn’t from any company. She asked, “Who are you then?” A guy near the front of the line demanded to know who the hell she was and wondered why her friend got to skip the line. She basically told him to mind his own business and not to interrupt conversations between two people. She pulled out her identification card to show that she was a front line worker as well, although I don’t know where. I know she volunteers or has been a volunteer at the food bank and maybe she volunteers at other places but I doubt if she’s an emergency worker of any kind.
            They argued back and forth until the security guard advised the guy that it wasn’t worth it and he calmed down for a while. It flared up again just before he went into the store.
            I bought six bags of grapes, a pint of strawberries, and a half pint of raspberries. They had a great deal on chicken legs, offering packs of three for about $3.00 and so I got two packs. I got mouthwash, some Greek yogourt and some berry skyr. Skyr is a very thick Icelandic yogourt and even though the fruit kind is sweetened it has a lot less sugar than other kinds.
            I got home from the supermarket just after 11:00, which was a time when I would normally still be at the food bank.
            I had Triscuits with cheddar and some skyr with a slice of pie for lunch.
            After a siesta I rode my bike up to Freedom Mobile. The clerk told me to leave my bike outside but I told him I hadn’t brought my lock. He reluctantly let me bring it in and put it against the window. When I pulled out my money and said that I was there to pay for my May plan I was told they weren’t taking cash right now. I put my money back in my pocket and told them I would have to go get my debit card. The manager said he’ would let me pay in cash this once.
            I worked on my journal and didn’t take a bike ride. It rained later on anyway.
            I noticed that evening that my back tire had gone soft a bit and so there must be a slow leak after all.
            I thawed and fried two sausages and then added an egg. I had them with a warmed up naan and a beer while watching two episodes of The Adventures of Robin Hood.
            The first one was story four of the fourth season. The tale begins with Robin and his men robbing three knights while Marian watches from the bushes. The three men have just returned from fighting in the Crusade and that they are carrying treasures that they looted from the Holy Land. One of the knights turns out to be Marian’s cousin, Sir Nigel Fitzhulme. Robin goes to tell Marian that she’d better ride home. Robin's man attempts to tie the men up but they protest that to be bound with ropes is undignified and they offer their word as gentlemen that they will not try to escape. But Nigel breaks his word, breaks free and escapes. He chases Marian but she is far ahead and makes it home before he gets there. Later Nigel’s companions, Sir John and Sir Gerald are released without their treasure and they join Nigel at Marian’s castle. We learn that it is Nigel’s intention to marry Marian so he can take possession of her land. Robin makes a deal with Nigel’s friends that he will give them back some of their treasure if they will participate in his plan to foil Nigel's attempt to wed Marian. They say they are getting tired of Nigel’s behaviour anyway. Nigel tells Marian that he knows she is in league with Robin Hood and that he will expose her to the sheriff if she does not agree to become his wife. She refuses and he sends for the sheriff. When the sheriff arrives  and Nigel tries to tell him that they were captured by Robin Hood and that Marian was with him, John and Gerald tell the sheriff that Nigel caught a fever when they were in the Holy Land and that it addled his brain. The sheriff tells Nigel he can either come with him to see a doctor in Nottingham or he can seek help abroad, as long as he causes no more stress to Lady Marian. In the end John and Gerald tell Robin they are going back to the Crusade in the Holy Land because life is much simpler there.
            The second story was fourth of the series and the one that introduces Friar Tuck. Robin receives a message to meet Tuck at Eldritch Shrine. One of the men tells Robin that Tuck is known to be an unusually good swordsman for a monk. Robin thinks they could use someone to say mass for them in the forest. Robin poses as a monk and finds Tuck fishing. They banter for a while and then Tuck tells the monk to be on his way. Robin asks Tuck to carry him across the stream. Tuck refuses and so the disguised Robin says he will stay. Tuck is protecting someone in the shrine and so he agrees to carry the monk to be rid of him. Halfway across Robin is teasing Tuck and treating him like a horse until finally Tuck tosses him into the water. I think this is part of the original story. Robin and Tuck draw swords and duel, although Robin is winning. Finally Tuck asks if he is Robin Hood and Robin conforms that he is. At that moment just as Tuck tells her to stop a young woman comes up from behind and knocks Robin unconscious. When Robin comes to Tuck explains that Mildred had thought that he was one of Lord Germain’s men. She is the daughter of Brian the herdsman who works on Germain’s estate. Germain wants to marry Mildred off to Sir William of Marmundsbury in exchange for a piece of William’s land. But Mildred is in love with Harold the Smith and so Tuck is protecting her. Tuck wants Robin to smuggle Mildred and Harold out of the shire so she’ll be free of Germaine's reach. Robin asks in exchange that Tuck serves to perform mass for the men in the forest and to join in their feasts. Just then Germaine and William arrive seeking Mildred. Tuck tells them Mildred has sought sanctuary in a consecrated place. Germaine says he’s never heard of sanctuary applying to anything but a church or monastery. Germaine tells William to wait there while he goes to fetch the sheriff. Robin thinks of challenging Sir William to a duel but Tuck says he can’t allow Robin to go into combat without first hearing his confession and that might take weeks. Harold confronts William but as Harold is not a swordsman William is reluctant to fight him. Tuck asks that Harold be allowed to say goodbye to Mildred. Seeing Mildred run to Harold  and hearing that Mildred would resent William for killing her love, William gives up and leaves. Tuck marries Mildred and Harold.

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