Helen Funai

            On Wednesday after midnight I did my usual search for bedbugs and found none. That makes thirteen days since a sighting. If there are none tomorrow morning I'll declare the infestation over and stop looking for them.

            I translated the first verse of "Arthur, où t'as mis le corps?" (Arthur, Where'd You Put the Corpse?) by Boris Vian: "It was planned to perfection / a plan we could get rich on / As a team we were strong / but the client was clever / so we killed him before / he could loosen his tongue." 

            I ran through "U.S.S.R. / U.S.A." by Serge Gainsbourg in French and English and uploaded it to Christian's Translations. I'll start editing it in preparation for blog publication tomorrow. 

            I weighed 89.4 kilos before breakfast. 

            Before 9:00 I logged into my Shakespeare class Zoom lecture. Just before class started I put my digital hand up and presented my idea to Professor Lopez about the Duke's cancelling Aegeon's sentence for trespassing in Ephesus. I said that rather than simply throwing out the law the Duke may be responding to a new set of laws since now Aegeon is revealed to have a wife in Ephesus and a son who is a prominent citizen. 

            He said he'd never thought of that before and he said it's plausible. He said if he were directing The Comedy of Errors and the actor playing the Duke were ask for a motivation at the end he might tell him what I said. 

            In Shakespeare we rarely receive clear reasons from the text. This type of thing happens a lot in Shakespeare plays. "In A Midsummer Night's Dream" the daughter wants to marry but the father disagrees and the Duke tells her to obey her dad. But in the end she does marry and the father wants her punished but the Duke says no. 

            The professor urged us to read part one of Henry IV by Monday. We had four classes dedicated to The Comedy of Errors but we have only three for Henry. 

            Henry IV is easier to follow but more difficult to read. There is a tapestry of different ways of speaking because Shakespeare was interested in various idioms of speech and language. He was painting a verbal picture of England. 

            In The Comedy of Errors there are some differences of speech. The slaves are less formal, the women are rhyming and the Duke is somewhat dukish, but it's generally homogenous in a verbal sense. That is more appropriate for a play that is about the similarities between people. 

            Shakespeare's comedies were more self limiting in the first five years of his career.

            The Comedy of Errors is based on a Roman comedy by Plautus about one set of twins. In adding another set of twins Shakespeare is outdoing a play that he probably studied in school. Roman drama followed self limiting conventions of traditional misunderstanding. Shakespeare and others of his time imitated those themes. In that idiom the differences of speech are less important. 

            His later plays are driven by the fact that playwrights were working on new kinds of more character driven plays. That was especially true of tragedy but Shakespeare also used it in his comedies. How characters speak differently from one another creates a texture. A history play has different imperatives. 

            Besides Plautus's play Shakespeare had other models for plays about mistaken identity such as a comedy by John Lily. Mix ups of identity were common in his time, especially early on. Shakespeare naturalized it. 

            The professor says few TV shows do it but I've found the trope of the identical double of a main character is used at least once on any sitcom that lasts more than one season. It's usually a clear indication that the writers are running out of ideas, but sometimes it's used to good effect such as with Samantha's identical but dark and seductive sister Sabrina on "Bewitched". Also "The Patty Duke Show" was entirely based on the mix ups that happen when identical teenage girls with different personalities live and go to school together. 

            Shakespeare had twins five years before writing Comedy of Errors but they were a boy and a girl. His son Hamnet died in 1596 and so there was then only one living twin. His later Twelfth Night also features twins. He actually put twins in more plays than anyone else. Was there a set of twin actors working in his company? Nobody knows because the information on that side of things is patchy.

            Comedy of Errors goes out of its way to create confusion of characters. It begins with the story told of the births of all of the twins. In 1.2 there is one twin's speech about missing the other drop of water. In 1.2.43 one Dromio enters. The twins must be costumed the same but slightly different. The audience must be able to distinguish between them and yet see how they are meant to look the same. There must be a shimmer of confusion without making the audience work too hard. The audience must be quickly on top of the differences of identity in order to enjoy the confusion the characters are experiencing. They have been primed early on with two speeches about twins. There is a dramatic irony in the differences between what the characters and the audience know. 

            Antipholus of Syracuse always thinks that he is experiencing magic. 

            In 2.1 the women interact with Dromio. 

            Shakespeare takes time to mix up the two sets of twins. 

            One Antipholus beats one Dromio and then the other to dramatize the exacerbation of trouble. The masters in this world beat their slaves when they are under stress. 

            Antipholus of Syracuse meets his sister in law Adriana who thinks he is her husband. 

            In 2.2.124 there is an echo of the twinning moment in 1.2.36 about searching for a matching drop of water when Adriana says a drop of water can't be pulled from the ocean without coming with other drops. The drops are indistinguishable. Shakespeare has themetized twinning wholeness arising from one relation to another. Parallels develop around the action of how the two Antipholi are mixed. Shakespeare delays the appearance of Antipholus of Ephesus. The plot unfolds slowly. The point of the first two acts is that one Antipholus is not the other. In 3.1 Antipholus of Ephesus enters bringing with him a new group of characters, the Goldsmith and Angelo. But we already know Antipholus of Ephesus because he has been spoken of and mistaken for. 

            The Comedy of Errors is not meant to confuse the audience. He wants a clash between behaviour and knowledge for the sake of dramatic irony. Some modern productions use one actor for both roles and this defeats the purpose because it confuses the audience who should be able to tell the two apart. 

            Shakespeare is interested in the conceptual ramifications of theatrical effects. 

            There is lots of play between slaves and masters. They have been together since birth and so they are almost twins except for being socially stratified. Slavery was not normal in Shakespeare's England as a historical institution. England didn't get involved in the slave trade until twenty years later. This is a particular fiction because the characters could have been masters and servants. He makes them slaves because he wants to dramatize the beatings. It was not sanctioned for someone to beat their servants. He wants to show lots of beatings so that the Dromios can talk about it as a fact of life. 

            The play is about social and economic bonds between people. The bond between Antipholus and Dromio is shown metaphorically when they are bound together by a rope. Many characters are talking about bonds and violence throughout the play. 

            The moment when Antipholus and Dromio of Syracuse discuss Nell becomes a not very funny comedy routine about her being shaped like a globe with the parts of her body being various countries of the world. This scene, a relic of a certain performance style, is detachable from the play. In 3.2.80-150 someone is described who looks different from anyone else in the play. Her body is important to the play and it is a nice thematic riff to make her body different but unseen. She looks like all the world and it makes a joke about the drops of water being indistinguishable. She is distinct and yet she looks like the whole world. Shakespeare uses this to enter a different conceptual domain. He is a complex thinker making harmonic and melodic material sometimes in the form of solos, arias, and surprising combos. 

            The rope and the chain are also twinned. A chain can be a sign of affection, economic binding but also a means of imprisonment. 

            I weighed 90.4 kilos before lunch. I had crackers with five year old cheddar and a glass of lemonade. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride to Yonge and Bloor. 

            I went just outside the Bloor bike lane to pass someone in the bike lane but she rang her bell to tell me that I should have warned her that I was passing. 

            On the Richmond bike lane a guy on an electric scooter had a cup of coffee in one hand and was swerving all over the lane. When I passed I told him to stay on the right and he made my day when he responded dramatically in perhaps a British accent, "Oh! Shot op!" 

            On Queen Street a guy was sitting on the sidewalk with his toque down over his eyes and a smart phone in his hands as he screamed "Stop attacking!" 

            I weighed 89.2 kilos at 18:00. 

            I finished typing my lecture notes at around 19:45. 

            I made pizza on a slice of Bavarian sandwich bread with mango and lime salsa for sauce and extra old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching an episode of Gomer Pyle. 

            In this story Gomer and Carter are still in Washington. They are leaving the hotel with Gomer on his way to sightsee and Carter heading for a date with Rose Pilchek. Gomer notices a little boy sitting by himself on the sidewalk looking dejected. Gomer tries to talk with him but he doesn't seem to speak English. Carter has been trying and failing to get a cab but notices the boy. Carter discovers that the boy only speaks Japanese and it turns out Carter knows some Japanese because he served in Korea and perhaps was also stationed in Japan. Carter learns the boy's address and wants to put the kid in a cab but Toki doesn't want to travel alone. Carter has to call Rose and she thinks it's charming that he's helping out a little boy. They take Toki to the address but it turns out to be an amusement park. Gomer thinks that Toki has amnesia and that if they take him on some rides he'll relax and remember where he lives. After several rides, a stuffed toy and some ice cream Toki gives them another address, but it turns out to be a place for boat rides. By this time Rose is getting increasingly mad every time Carter calls her. After a boat ride they get another adress and it's a baseball stadium. They take Toki to a Washington Senators game where when a player tries to get home and is called out Toki gets excited and shouts "He was safe by a mile!" Gomer and Carter realize they've been conned. Toki confesses he lives at the Japanese Embassy. He admits he pretended but only because while living at the embassy he never gets to go anywhere. They take Toki to the embassy and they are greeted by his beautiful sister who invites them in for tea but before Carter can accept Gomer says Carter has to go and patch things up with a girlfriend. 

            Toki's sister was played by Helen Funai, who danced on Broadway in "The Flower Drum Song", danced four years on the Red Skelton Show and later became a member of the singing and dancing group The Dingaling Sisters on The Dean Martin Show. She was the first Asian member of the group. Then she appeared in Martin's Matt Helm movie "Murderer's Row." Later she had a regular part as Kim Douglas on Days of Our Lives.

September 30, 1991: I banged my finger and bled from under my fingernail twice while unloading the truck

Thirty years ago today

            On Monday morning I was back at Kingston Road and McCowan to finish the job we'd started on Friday. The trailer had been taken away and so we had to wait. Ray went on a coffee run and then Bill Black arrived with the trailer. It was afternoon by the time we got it loaded and headed for Burlington. We had lunch at Applewood Mall and then waited in front of the customer's new house for two hours because she hadn't gotten the key. 

            I banged my finger and it bled from under the nail twice while unloading. The customer got us Kentucky Fried Chicken for dinner and we finished at around 21:30. 

            I got a ride to Kipling with Ray and headed back to Nancy's place. When I got there I went around to the back and knocked on the glass sliding doors of the family room. Nancy's sister Susan had been sleeping with her until then and she got up to let me in. 

            I finished reading my book on folk songs and got caught up on my diary, but at the time I wrote this I was behind again.

Allison Hayes

            On Monday after midnight I did my usual search for bedbugs and found none. That makes twelve days without a sighting and if I reach the two week mark I'll stop doing these pre-bedtime searches. 

            I downloaded the lyrics for "Arthur, où t'as mis le corps?" (Arthur, Where'd You Put the Corpse?) by Boris Vian. It's a fairly long song and over the next few days I'll work on my translation. 

            I finished working out the chords for "U.S.S.R. / U.S.A." by Serge Gainsbourg. Tomorrow I'll go through it in French and English and then upload it to Christian's Translations to prepare it for publication on the blog. 

            I weighed 90.1 kilos before breakfast, but breakfast consisted of half a bowl of grapes because I had to leave for my first in person class in a year and a half. 

            On my way to US Lit class my bike suddenly went into high gear and while I was trying to switch it back the chain came off. I had to stop and get my hands greasy putting it back on and making it worse was the fact that the chain had somehow gotten on the outside of the chain guard. I had to pry the guard a bit to push the chain back under it. I started riding again but at first I couldn't switch the chain back down to the middle gear wheel. After riding and fumbling with it for a while it finally went down. 

            I had come a bit early to make sure I could find the room in the Sidney Smith building where course was taking place. But it turns out to be in the same room where I took The Canadian Short Story and the Philosophy of Aesthetics course. It's also the last room where I wrote a live test. 

            Professor Morgenstern was already in the lecture hall struggling with the technical issue of coordinating her laptop with the projector screen. She was on the intercom with tech support. 

            I took out my laptop and tried to get the chord to stretch from a front seat in the middle to a plug on the front wall but it wouldn't reach. The guy behind me in the second row saw my problem and offered his extension cord. That was nice of him. Later another guy sat in the front row two seats away and asked if he could plug into it as well. I'll bring my own next time. 

            There were still several minutes before the start of class and so I had time to go to the washroom and scrub most of the chain grease off my hands. 

            The professor began by saying it was strange to be there since the last live class she taught was in March of 2020. 

            She says that some people wonder why she is teaching Frederick Douglass, Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau in a literature course. These texts are crucial to the canon of the United States. She advised us to bring a literary sense to any written text we study, pause over the wording and sentences and apply close reading. She assured us that the course will feel more literary in the traditional sense soon. 

            We returned briefly to Frederick Douglass. The terms "slave" and "man" are powerfully opposed terms that cross one another in Douglass's writing. Could we substitute the word "individual" for "man"? Is gender marking important. I think in talking about being resurrected from the tomb of slavery Douglass is making himself and the African slave in general into a Christ figure. He is self resurrecting. He was criticized for not depicting his escape but in doing so he would have revealed secret information and put others in danger. His actual escape was not a dramatic adventure but it was clever and required a lot of help from others including his future wife. Douglass is stronger for having developed self reliance. Juxtapose his copying of the writing from Master Thomas's school writing book while literally working in limited space with his fistfight with the slave master. 

            She gives us Emerson's biography because of its historical and social context but tells us to focus on the primary text. 

            Emerson was revered for his influence but also critiqued. He was a major influence on Thoreau who became more like Emerson than Emerson. Emerson was shocked that Thoreau took him at his word so much. Herman Melville had a critical perspective on Emerson. Emerson is not celebrated as much in our era but Ralph Waldo Ellison used Emerson as a character in his novel. Emerson pops up elsewhere in the US canon from time to time. 

            Emerson was a Transcendentalist philosopher whose priority was meditation on the private self. More recently people are interested in his politics and his environmentalist thinking. Emerson's thinking can be tied in with New England's history and the Calvinism of the Puritan settlers. Calvinism will play in important part in the 19th Century novel The Scarlet Letter, which we will be reading shortly. 

           The Calvinist belief is that we are born fallen with an innate depravity and few among us are elected to Grace. There rose a general dissatisfaction and a cultural distancing from that theological model. This led to the formation of the Unitarian Association. The movement was away from the sinful and toward the divine potential of everyone. To understand goodness we must become excellent and godlike. 

            Emerson came from a long line of ministers and became one himself but resigned to become a poet and an essayist. He transvalues religious terms and values. He'll use a word in a sense in which he does not want to use it and then use it in another sense. He does not like traditional prayer. He would rather sit silently with the congregation in the church than hear the minister's sermon. 

            Puritanism led to Unitarianism which led to Transcendentalism. Transcendentalism was a club made up mostly of Unitarian ministers. The rule was not exactly the same as Fight Club. The rule was that no one whose presence would prevent discussion was allowed to attend. Emerson's "Manifesto of Nature" from 1836 was important. Transcendentalism can be said to be the equivalent of English Romanticism. 

            But the Romanticists didn't call themselves Romanticists whereas the Transcendentalists called themselves Transcendentalists. 

            The Bible is history rather than revelation and communion is rejected in favour of self reliance. Juxtapose Douglass and Emerson but note this essay predates Douglass's narrative. Emerson came late to abolition. He met Douglass when he attended a speech he gave in 1844. 

            Emerson had an epigrammatic style that was ridiculously quotable. He says the same thing over and over until he gets it right and then says it all in one sentence. His arguments do not follow the usual process of having a beginning, a middle and an end. 

            We looked at the first paragraph with its emphasis on genius and the spoken word over the written. He promotes spontaneity and says that we miss out on our individuality when it is returned to us from outside. Great art teaches that we should abide by our own spontaneous impressions.

            I said it sounds like he's saying it's a race and it seems odd to me that we should be ashamed of someone getting an idea before we do. 

            Getting one's self from another is shameful. Is it a race to stand apart as an individual? It seems competitive but Emerson would not like it to be seen that way. He's saying don't let insecurities trump your passion. Individuals are infinitely rich. We learn what it means to be a self by missing out on it. If we are taking the self from another we have an alienated majesty. We must witness our own sovereign nature. 

            Genius in its original definition is one's own personal pagan spirit. He writes about childhood because the pre-social child and the innocent adult have on their faces the text of selfhood. Emerson likes the word "virtue" which has the same root as "virile." One must pay attention to his intended meaning because he sometimes uses the word "virtue" in a negative sense. He is re-inventing virtue. He invokes the radical idea of revolution, but a personal and not a political revolution. Do not be burdened by the past. Do not be consistent but rather be now. 

            We took a break. 

            Emerson's view on social bonds. Is the individual gendered and racialized? Goodness must have an edge. Make careful decisions. He sometimes gives money to causes that don't fit what he wants to support. He's not saying he has achieved the ideal he speaks of but continues to try. 

            Blood relations can be set aside for those with whom one has a spiritual affinity. A family by choice rather than birth. But spiritual affinity may not be a choice either. One's genius is one's god. He hopes he will have good justifications that are more than whims. 

            Is the individual a man? There are two kinds of men. One of them is at odds with the self. The radical artist is associated with manly traits. But elsewhere he says we want men and women. The social conformist becomes feminized in his philosophy. To be great is to be misunderstood. 

            The "brute" is perhaps what is perceived as the primal man whom he represents with the example of the Maori whom he calls the naked New Zealander. 

            I say that he picks someone so far away that they become purely imagined as an ideal. 

            She suggests we use close reading to look at the Maori objects that Emerson mentions. 

            Emerson once introduced Thoreau as being always right and perverse. 

            Thoreau asks himself what can I do without? His little cabin on Walden Pond was built on Emerson's property. Professor Morgenstern sees Thoreau as a male version of Emily Dickenson. His life had the quality of performance art. Thoreau says to serve the state is to resist it but this is not a call to arms but merely invokes the revolution. He promotes passive resistance by opting out. One does not have the obligation to take on the wrongs of the nation and so one should withdraw allegiance. If one does that the revolution is accomplished. Neither be a machine or a mind serving the state but rather serve by following one's conscience. But if one does that one will be treated like an enemy. If I don't pay my tax then the revolution is accomplished. Do not be afraid of bloodshed because far worse occurs when the conscience is wounded. 

            Thoreau's night in jail was like a performance. He was more like a tourist in a cell but did not feel confined. Meditation cannot be imprisoned. 

            I told the professor after class that his night in jail can be compared to Arthur Koestler's Darkness At Noon in which the author really did experience prison. She agreed that it seems funny that he would make such a big deal about one night in jail when so many have served real time. 

            I said many of us have spent one night in jail. She immediately thought that meant that I have and I have but I wasn't saying that. She asked if I wrote an essay about it and I said no, not an essay.

            Since I was downtown already I finished the distance of what would be my usual bike ride by riding up to Bloor, east to Yonge, south to Richmond and then home. 

            I weighed 89.1 kilos before lunch. 

            I took a siesta and slept half an hour longer than usual. 

            I worked on posting my blogs and then typing my lecture notes. 

            I weighed 89.6 kilos before dinner. I had a potato with gravy and two pork chops while watching an episode of Gomer Pyle. 

            In this story Gomer and Sergeant Carter go to Washington because Gomer is representing Camp Henderson as a singer at a special event. Gomer expects to be seeing the sights of Washington with Carter but Carter plans on ditching Gomer to hook up with his old girlfriend Rose Pilchek. Carter is disappointed that he and Gomer are sharing a hotel room because of their difference in rank. When Gomer goes siteseeing Carter makes an excuse that he's visiting relatives. He meets Rose but every time he's getting romantic he gets a call from Gomer telling him what landmark he's just visited. Finally Gomer visits the White House and wanders by accident into the president's office. He is so excited that he calls Carter from there and he is arrested and finger printed by the Secret Service. Since he's in Washington with Carter the secret service come and get Carter from Rose's apartment. Once their story checks out they are allowed to leave but on the street Gomer almost gets hit by a car. It turns out to be the president's limo and he says "Hey Mr President" and gets a wave. Later when Carter and Rose are on a dinner date and Carter thinks they are free of Gomer he finds them anyway. Carter tries to get rid of him but when Rose hears Gomer met the president she wants to hear all about it and invites him to join them for dinner. 

            Rose was played by Allison Hayes in her final role. Allison was Miss Washington D.C. in the 1949 Miss America pageant. Her first film was "Francis Joins the WACS" in which she played opposite the famous talking mule. She played Livia in "The Undead" and co-starred in "The Unearthly". She starred in "Attack of the 50 Foot Woman." She considered her best performance to have been in "Count Three and Pray." She played poker dealer Ellie Winters on the "Bat Masterson" TV series . I didn't finish typing my lecture notes until after dinner and then by the time I updated my journal it was bedtime.

September 29, 1991: Breakfast and his girlfriend got kicked out of the Lizard Lounge for slashing each other with razors

Thirty years ago today

            I got up at 9:37 on Sunday. I had breakfast and coffee and worked on projects. I called Breakfast and he came over at around 13:30. He talked about his interest in S & M and how he and his girlfriend liked mutual cutting so much that they got kicked out of the Lizard Lounge one night for slashing each other with razors.

The Courtesan

            On Monday after midnight I did my usual search for bedbugs and once again I happily found none. That makes it eleven days since the last sighting. That's definitely past the egg hatching period. Another three times and I'll stop checking. 

            I finished posting my translation of "La java des chaussettes à clous" (The Tap Dance of the Hobnail Boots) by Boris Vian. That completes all the recordings I have of his voice in my files but I have an album of Vian songs sung by Serge Regianni. The next Vian song I'll try to learn is "Arthur, où t'as mis le corps?" (Arthur, Where'd You Put the Corpse?" 

            I worked out the chords for the instrumental bridge of "U.S.S.R. / U.S.A." by Serge Gainsbourg and then the third verse and chorus. There's really just the finale to go. 

            I weighed 90.7 kilos before breakfast. 

            Before 9:00 I logged into the Zoom meeting room for my Shakespeare class and just kept my video off while I had half of my breakfast. I was the first one there for several minutes. I've had too many connectivity problems to try to log in just on time. 

            One of the most frequent questions about the theatrical representation of twins is how is it done. Professor Lopez will talk about that in the final class. 

            The Courtesan would be considered by most as a minor character in The Comedy of Errors. She does not appear until Act 4 and her line count is low but she is extremely important. More than she needs to be, which is typical of Shakespeare. The procedure of following a character with low lines is rewarding and productive. One of our essay topics will ask us to do that. 

            A convention in talking of Shakespeare is that people want to divide characters into strong ones and opposites. The strong ones have articulated goals or desires that are demonstrated by their actions that resonate with other actions. Some characters may seem weak and marginalized. When characters are not speaking it is hard to pay attention to them but they are present. Lopez encourages the habit of paying attention to the fact that there is no such thing as a weak character in any good play. 

            We are reading five of Shakespeare's very best plays. They are extremely great and are five of the best plays ever written in English and perhaps any language. All characters need humans to embody them and realize their presence. Shakespeare thought about every human he put on the stage because he was making art. Every piece of a work of art is essential to the work. Rembrandt did not just grab any yellow for a painting. 

            Shakespeare as a playwright is more interested in details than themes. The details are interesting in themselves. He uses extreme detail and more than is needed to simply tell the story. 

            4.1.1-6 introduces characters not seen before. The Second Merchant says to Angelo that he has known since Pentecost that he owes him money. Now he is bound for Persia very soon and needs to be paid before leaving. Angelo is in danger of being arrested if he does not fork up the funds. Pentecost is the Sunday after Easter and so the money has been owed since late spring. It is made clear that in the merchant's dealings his debtors are given casual leaway about paying back the money under normal circumstances. The socio economic relationship is not usually hurried but now the merchant has to go. The merchant's speech gives us a glimpse of Shakespeare's interest. The details in this play are finely worked out around transactions. 

            5.1.381-94 near the point of reconciliation Antipholus of Ephesus reminds Angelo that he never had the chain but he was arrested anyway. Angelo says he thought he had the chain and won't apologize. Adriana speaks with deference to her husband saying that she gave the money to Dromio but he failed to deliver it. But she gave it to the wrong Dromio. Dromio defends himself and demands not to be beaten. Everyone is protecting themselves and justifying their behaviour. Antipholus of Syracuse tries to smooth things over and says there is no need to argue since Dromio gave him the money. 

            When Antipholus of Ephesus says, "We saw each other's man" he may be speaking directly to his twin Antipholus of Syracuse. He must gesture somehow to Antipholus of Syracuse in order to get his money back from him which he uses to pay the fine for the man he only just discovered is his father. This solution is unexpected because Antipholus of Syracuse has the money which he could have used to pay for his father's life. But then the Duke says there's no need to pay the money after all. He renders the financial problem between the brothers irrelevant. The money and the law are thrown out. 

            But I wonder if Aegeon's crime of trespassing in Ephesus is rendered void by the Duke because Aegeon turns out to be married to Aemilia who is a citizen of Ephesus. 

            The Courtesan then speaks, demanding of Antipholus of Ephesus what he owes to her. He gives the diamond readily and thanks her. The professor suggests that this is the real conclusion of the play.

            We must go back to trace the Courtesan from her beginnings in the play. She is first mentioned in 3.1.109-11 when Antipholus of Ephesus is locked out of his home as a woman he knows at the Porcupine Inn. His wife has expressed jealousy over his relationship with her. He says he will give her the chain that he had planned on giving to his wife. We do not yet know that the woman being spoken of is a sex trade worker. The Porcupine is a good name for a dangerous establishment. He says he will give the chain to the hostess there but we do not yet know what that means. 

            In 4.1.12 the Courtesan is first mentioned in the stage directions but the audience does not see the stage directions. Antipholus of Ephesus is angry because Angelo did not bring him the chain. Angelo gave it to Antipholus of Syracuse. Antipholus of Syracuse wants to give it to the Courtesan to spite his wife for locking him out. There is no need at this point for the Courtesan to be in the plot. The problem becomes a crisis when Antipholus does not receive the chain and does not give it to the Courtesan. Later she will bring in more financial confusion. Angelo might imagine that the Courtesan has the chain. There is no reason to think that she will appear as a character. 

            In 4.3-40 the Courtesan enters, sees Antipholus of Syracuse wearing the chain that was promised to her and accuses him of shirking his obligations. She is obviously recognizable by her costume as a sex trade worker and Antipholus warns her not to tempt him. The story of Antipholus of Ephesus's transaction with the hostess of the Porcupine Inn regarding the chain suggests the nature of his lunch at the inn. She is a merchant and he has made a financial transaction with her. Maybe they had sex and the chain was promised as payment. Their relationship deepens. She asks for the ring he had at dinner and this is the first time it is mentioned. She took the ring from her finger and gave it to him. This giving of a ring usually indicates marriage or engagement. Big promises were made. She was promised more than just the chain showing that this is a relationship of high value with each investing in the other. The ring is unseen. She says she wants her ring or the chain. In 4.3.75-6 she makes it clear she wants to be square in this arrangement but she is high and dry with no ring and no chain. 

            In 4.3. 80-4 she concludes Antipholus must be mad because of this and added to the proof of this condition is the story he told at dinner of having been locked out of his own home. She will make use of his madness and tell Adriana that her husband came to her house and stole her ring. 

            We took a break. 

            In 4.3.80-4 we learn the Courtesan's plan. Think about the work of any character no matter how few lines they have. She is on a parallel with the other merchants. She is not elaborated historically but she is precisely sketched. Her function is to complicate the plot. She is a multiplier. The conventional function of the play could have left her out but Shakespeare puts emphasis on her. She has a transactional relationship with Antipholus of Ephesus that goes beyond financial value. He does not need her ring. 

           The mistress of Antipholus of Ephesus goes to his wife. She is like Antipholus in that she wants that which is hers. She is smart and realistic when she tells the story to Adriana. She knows that she thinks her husband is crazy. She uses an Iago-like process in that she uses materials at hand to bend someone's belief to her advantage. 4.4.39f Adriana is well primed. Antipholus of Ephesus is arrested. The Courtesan points out to Adriana that Antipholus is beating Dromio as further proof of his madness. But he beats Dromio all the time and so does Adriana. 

            Antipholus of Ephesus sees his wife coming with the Courtesan. He sees all of his worlds colliding. His wife, her sister, his mistress, and the jailer. At this point Dromio jokes about him being hanged so no wonder he beats him. What is unsaid and needs to be said is that Antipholus now knows that the Courtesan has been talking to his wife. In 4.4.102 he calls her a dissembling harlot and technically she is a harlot but the term can also mean sexually promiscuous. 

            Adriana and the Courtesan are silent rivals. It is silently dramatized that they are a matched pair in their opposition. Antipholus cannot return the ring to her in front of his wife. The Courtesan needs to take the focus back. She points out the ring and dominates the scene with her need for it. The chain and the ring are another matched pair. Adriana has not seen the chain. 

           The Courtesan stays with Adriana and Luciana. From 5.1.32-102 the Courtesan is silent as she watches and listens. Angelo knows Antipholus of Ephesus's wandering nature as he was asked for the chain to give to the Courtesan. It's the boy's club of Ephesus. 

            In 5.1.45-6 Adriana knows her husband is having an affair. The Abbess advises her not to be a nag and Adriana admits she's too hard on her husband. 5.1.57-90 the Courtesan is listening to Adriana. The Abess's criticism is a moment for the Courtesan. 5.1.98-100 Adriana is trying to cure herself of jealousy by taking on the role of nurse for Antipholus. The Courtesan watches and listens as Adriana embellishes the story she told her. In 5.1.136-44 maybe Adriana is trying to cause the Courtesan's story to make sense. She uses the Courtesan's story to deceive herself. 

            In 5.1.205 Antipholus accuses his wife of feasting with harlots. The professor adds "like a Republican." 

            5.1.219-25 we have a revisionist history of the earlier part of the play when Antipholus says he had lunch with Balthazar. But in 5.1.276 Dromio spills the beans that Antipholus had lunch with the Courtesan. He does so to get him out of a jam but it puts him in another. The Courtesan is also saving Antipholus by claiming he is crazy and saying that he snatched her ring from her finger. 

            After speaking, the focus on the Courtesan is sidelined as Antipholus and Dromio of Syracuse arrive. She confirms that she has no authorized place in the social world of Ephesus. She is external to the recombination. Like the merchant bound for Persia she has a huge place in the economy of Ephesus. He is bound. Bound for Persia but also bound in his obligations as are others bound to him. The Courtesan is unbound and can bind others. There is a connection between economic and emotional ties in the final reunion. 

            She reminds Antipholus of Ephesus of his debt to her and in an amazing moment, instead of taking this opportunity to disavow her he responds by acknowledging her, paying her and thanking her for a good time. 

            I weighed 89.9 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride to Yonge and Bloor. As I went south on Yonge I passed the Zanzibar, which had a big sign above the door that read, "No Pass, No Ass." Obviously in reference to the covid 19 vaccination pass. 

            I weighed 89.7 kilos when I got home. I almost finished typing my lecture notes before dinner. 

            I had a potato with gravy and two pork chops while watching an episode of Gomer Pyle. 

            In this story Camp Henderson is having a talent contest to send the winner to represent the base in Washington. Sergeant Carter is not interested in it until Sergeant Hacker taunts him with the opera singing recruit named Brian Jones he's had transferred to his platoon. Carter auditions talent in his platoon but is disappointed to find that only Gomer has any talent. He reluctantly signs Gomer up. Later Gomer meets Brian when he hears him singing and is impressed. Niether of them feel competitive towards the other and it turns out that Brian's first love is teaching voice. Brian begins to coach Gomer. Carter tries to sabotage Brian's voice by pretending he's made a mistake and forcing him to repeat over and over that he will not do it again. Hacker tries to sabotage Gomer's voice by having him work in the refrigerated food storage room and turning down the temperature. At the competition both men sing so beautifully that the officer in charge has to flip a coin and Gomer wins. Gomer says that Brian should have won because he taught him how to sing. Learning Brian is a teacher the officer assigns him to be head of the base glee club, which is his dream assignment. Gomer is now being sent to Washington and Carter thinks he'll be rid of him for three weeks, but Gomer requests that Carter be sent to Washington with him. 

            Brian Jones was played by Brian Aver, who caught the attention of a Hollywood Scout when he was co-starring in How Green Was My Valley on Broadway. He was signed to Universal with Harrison Ford and Katherine Ross. He costarred with Ford in Journey to Shiloh and he and Ross played the wedding couple in The Graduate. He played Diane Keaton's boyfriend in Woody Allen's "Sleeper." He became a member of the board of governors for the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. He became a producer of such films as "Crash" and "The Devil and Daniel Webster." He is the father of Eric Avery, the bass player for Jane's Addiction.

September 28, 1991: I pulled out but came immediately after and the condom was broken so Nancy used spermicide to be sure

Thirty years ago today 

            On Saturday morning I woke up at around 8:30 and got ready to go. I told Nancy I was leaving but she said for me to wait until she got back from the eye doctor. So after she left I took the baby and some of Nancy's milk to Bamburgh Plaza where I had breakfast. Once the baby finished the milk I had to go back and Nancy arrived just as I got there. We finally got away at 14:00 and when we made it to the Beaches Nancy wanted to go to The Body Shop. I felt like we'd already wasted enough of the day on her and so I complained. We argued until I agreed that she could go to The Body Shop but by that time it was already behind us she we went to Shoppers Drug Mart while I went to the Beer Store. We were supposed to meet there but I couldn't find her. 

            That night Nancy and I made love for the first time since way before the baby was born on May 17. I promised to withdraw before I came and I did but when I pulled out I ejaculated right away and it turned out that the condom had broken. It was so close to having been inside of her that Nancy wasn't sure and so she went out to find some spermicide. 

            She took the baby back to Scarborough and I stayed at my place. I jerked off twice before going to bed.

Jack Riley

            On Sunday after midnight I did my usual check for bedbugs and found none. That makes ten days since I saw the last one. 

            It's hard to pinpoint any progress in mobility for my sprained right arm. Maybe I was able to put a little more weight on it and extend it upward a few more times against the resistance of a rubber band.

            I worked out the chords for the second verse and chorus of "U.S.S.R. / U.S.A." by Serge Gainsbourg and part of the instrumental. 

            Around midday I worked some more on scraping the grease from my fryer basket. It'll take another two sessions to finish it, which means maybe next Sunday. I'll never really get all the grease off unless I unravel all the wires, clean them and then twist them back together but I'm not going to do that.

            I weighed 89.6 kilos before lunch.

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride to Yonge and Bloor. I'd had my windows closed all day and thought that I was going to need my jacket but when I went out on the deck I found it was warmer outside than it looked. I wore an open long sleeved shirt and I was fine. I weighed 89.6 kilos when I got home. 

            I wrote my email assignment to send to Professor Lopez before Shakespeare class tomorrow morning: 

            Carrying on with your theme of things not adding up, the ways in which the two Antipholi are different does not fit with the nature of twins. When identical twins are drastically unalike it tends to be the result of the circumstance of being raised apart. Being a father of twins Shakespeare would have known how similar in personality twins are. Individuals are more likely to be the opposite of themselves than twins are to be the opposite of one another. If Antipholus of Syracuse is by nature a wanderer then Antipholus of Ephesus would be as well. Among the many things Shakespeare is doing in this play it seems that he is showing how circumstances transform people and he is applying this to class. Outside of circumstances Antipholus of Syracuse is close to being the same person as Antipholus of Ephesus and Shakespeare is using this to say that the ways in which society determines station do not add up. 

            I finished my second reading of The Comedy of Errors. The professor had suggested a tension between the two Antipholi when they finally meet but I notice that Antipholus of Syracuse tells Dromio of Syracuse to rejoice over finding his twin. That must mean that rejoicing is on Antipholus of Syracuse's mind as well. 

            I finished a second reading of Ralph Waldo Emerson's "Self Reliance." He makes an odd statement in the beginning: " ... tomorrow a stranger will say with masterful good sense precisely what we have thought and felt all the time and we shall be forced to take with shame our own opinion from another." It seems like he's saying it's a race and so express your ideas before anyone else. 

            I also re-read the first four pages of Henry David Thoreau's "Resistance to Civil Government." 

            I made pizza on naan with Napolese sauce and extra old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching Gomer Pyle. 

            In this story Gomer comes to the Bluebird Cafe and reveals to Sergeant Carter and Bunny that whenever he has the same dream three times it comes true. He says he dreamed thrice that Sergeant Carter would get his uniform messed up right there at the cafe. Then Gomer stands up and accidentally spills chili all over Carter's uniform. Next Gomer comes to Bunny and Carter in a supermarket and tells her that he dreamed three times that Bunny is going to have a night on the town with Sergeant Carter. At the checkout Bunny is greeted as the millionth customer and in addition to $100 worth of groceries she will be given a night on the town. Gomer then reveals that he's dreamed twice that Sergeant Carter will propose to Bunny and all he has to do is dream it a third time and it will come true. Carter desperately tries to keep Gomer from dreaming by making him stay awake with special details. But Carter ends up having a dream about marrying Bunny. He decides that he might as well get it over with and propose. But when he does so he is so defeated about it that Bunny turns him down. She says she wants him to propose when the idea makes him happy. Gomer comes and tells them he had the dream a third time. Carter says his dream didn't come true but Gomer says it did because all he dreamed was the proposal and not the answer. 

            The clerk at the supermarket checkout was played by Dee Carroll, who appeared in The Stunt Man. She played the housekeeper Adele Winston Hamilton on Days of Our Lives. 

            During this fourth season Duke, Gomer's usual companion is not the there because Ronnie Schelle had his own sitcom that year. He'll return as a corporal in the final season of Gomer Pyle USMC. 

            At the very beginning of this episode Gomer is sitting with a fellow Marine named Larry. Larry was played by Jack Riley, who started out as a baseball player. He became a radio personality in Cleveland and then went out west to work as a writer for his friend Tim Conway's TV guest appearances. He became a regular on the sitcom "Occasional Wife." He became both a writer and performer for "Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In." He played Elliot Carlin on "The Bob Newhart Show." He had a recurring role on "Son of the Beach." He was the voice of Stu Pickles on "Rugrats."

September 27, 1991: I misplaced my bag in transit and doubled back to find it on the bus at Main Station

Thirty years ago today

            On Friday morning I met Shane at McCowan and Kingston Road and Ray showed up later. The trailer was already there. I'd moved the customer's father almost a year before. We only loaded what she wouldn't be needing for the weekend and we would finish on Monday. It took us four hours and halfway through she made us lunch. 

            I got a ride to Bamburgh Plaza with Ray. When I got to Nancy's place she and the baby weren't there. I was getting ready to go to my place when Nancy's mother said Nancy wanted me to wait. I waited half an hour and then left. 

            I misplaced my bag in transit and doubled back to find it on the bus at Main Station. 

            When I got to my place Nancy came a minute later to ask me to come in the car and take care of the baby, so I did.

Sleep Drunk

            On Saturday after midnight I did my usual search for bedbugs and found none. That made it nine days since I've seen any. I was going to wait until I saw none for two weeks before using my comforter but it was cold and the night before I hadn't slept very well with just a sheet over my naked body and so I decided to risk it. I had a good sleep and didn't even get up at 2:00 to pee, which caused me to pee like Auston Powers when I got up at 5:00. 

            There was no dramatic progress in the mobility of my sprained arm during yoga but I assume it's continuing to heal. 

            I worked out most of the chords for the first verse of "U.S.S.R. / U.S.A." by Serge Gainsbourg. I might almost have it finished tomorrow. 

            I weighed 88.8 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around noon I went out to No Frills. The guy with Down's Syndrome who begs outside asked me to get him something but I said, "Sorry." I thought that I might get him something after all but once I was inside I forgot. Both the red and green grapes were cheap but the red ones were mostly soft so I only got one bag and four bags of the green ones. I also bought a pack of toilet paper, four bags of skim milk, a bag of flour, mango and lime salsa, two cartons of spoon size shredded wheat, orange juice, lemonade, skyr and extra old cheddar.

            I weighed 89.4 kilos before lunch. I had crackers with five year old cheddar and a glass of limeade. 

            In the early afternoon I took a siesta as usual. Sometimes when I wake my surroundings seem wrong and things appear to be missing. This afternoon when I woke I looked at a shelf and noticed that something that should be there wasn't. I contemplated the possibility that I'd been robbed, but upon more clearly waking I realized the thing that I thought should be there had never been there and that it wasn't even in my possession. At such times it's as if I've arrived from some alternative reality and I'm adjusting to the differences.

            It was raining when I got up but then it stopped when I was posting my blog. When I'd finished it had started again and so I decided to do some exercises at home while listening to a YouTube video of a performance of The Comedy of Errors. Once I'd started exercising the rain stopped again but I decided I didn't want to be teased anymore by the weather and so I stayed home from cycling to spite it.

            This production was better than the last one I'd watched but there were these annoying sound effects of an ocean storm that nearly drowned out Aegeon's origin speech to the Duke.

            I weighed 89.2 kilos at 17:45. 

            I re-read out loud about half of "The Comedy of Errors" and most of Emerson's "Self Reliance."

            I made pizza on naan with Napolese sauce, a can of mushrooms and extra old cheddar. I topped it with hot sauce and had it with a beer while watching an episode of Gomer Pyle. 

            In this story a general and a congressman named Travers are coming to the base and so Sergeant Hacker is required to accept an extra man from Carter's platoon to work in his kitchen. Carter gives him Gomer because he has to take the men on an exercise using live ammunition and he doesn't want Gomer anywhere near it. Hacker decides he will be safe if all Gomer has to do is peel potatoes. While the general is discussing breakfast with Hacker Gomer approaches Hacker to tell him he's peeled all the potatoes and chopped all the cabbage. The general sees Gomer as efficient and responsible and so he selects Gomer to pour the coffee at the breakfast. Gomer is making sure everyone's cups are full but just as Travers has let his coffee cool to the right temperature Gomer tops it up and Travers burns his mouth. At first the congressman is angry until Gomer offers to saucer and blow the coffee. It's apparently a term from the south and Travers asks Gomer where he's from. When he says Mayberry, North Carolina the congressman knows it well because he's the congressman from North Carolina. When Gomer learns Travers's name he recognizes him and tells him that he kissed him when he was a baby. Travers is so impressed with Gomer that he insists he join them for breakfast. Later he asks why after three and a half years Gomer hasn't been promoted to corporal. This question gets asked down the ranks until Carter is ordered to prepare Gomer to be a corporal. But everything Carter tries to get Gomer to rise to leadership fails and finally he gives up, even if it means losing his stripes. But Gomer saves the day again by talking with Travers and explaining that no one could have tried harder than Carter but he's just not ready.

September 26, 1991: In "The Fisher King," when Jeff Bridges finally said "I love you" to Mercedes Ruhl, our baby shouted out something that sounded like "Yay!"

Thirty years ago today

            On Thursday morning I headed out to meet Gary at St Clair and Yonge but when I got to the subway I realized that I was an hour early so I had a coffee at Druxy's. I was on the job site half an hour before Gary. We did a lot of pick ups and deliveries and finished off near Finch Station. I called Nancy and arranged to meet at 17:00 in the food court under the Hudson's Bay Centre. I had an hour to kill so I went to the Brass Rail. Nancy and I went to see "The Fisher King." At first she didn't like it but in the end she said it was very good but not great. She liked "Dead Again" better. It was my second time seeing it and I liked it so much I could have gone again. 

            With perfect timing, after Jeff Bridges's character finally says "I love you" to Mercedes Ruhl's character, the baby made a loud noise that sounded like "Yay!" Everyone in the theatre laughed. 

            We headed straight back for Nancy's place and took the Birchmount bus.

Carol Burnett

            After midnight on Friday I did my usual search for bedbugs and found none. So that's eight days since I found the last one. If I don't see any by the end of next week I'm going to stop checking as often, move my guitar back into the bedroom and put the books back on the shelf. 

            It was quite cold overnight and so when I got up to pee at around 3:00 I turned the oven on. My comforter would have kept me warm but I want to keep it in the kitchen for now just in case the bedbugs are still around because it's so difficult to wash. 

            I was able to fully extend my sprained arm straight up several times while stretching a bicycle tube attached to my foot. 

            I worked out the chords to the chorus of "U.S.S.R. / U.S.A." by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            I weighed 89.3 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I finished cleaning my steamer basket and started working on the fryer basket. It's tedious work because I'm trying to scrape the dirt from every wire in the netting. I'll work on it some more on Sunday. 

            I weighed 89 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride to Yonge and Bloor. It was almost cool enough to wear my leather jacket but once I got going the open long sleeved shirt was enough. I noticed a few days ago that the authorities have torn down the tent city at Dufferin and Queen and put up a fence. I don't see why they cared since it wasn't in a part of the park anyone used. There's very little about it online even though it was there for a year. I weighed 88.9 kilos when I got home. 

            I read Henry David Thoreau's "Resistance to Civil Government." He mostly didn't want to pay taxes. He thought there should be little or no government. He touches on the importance of Abolition. 

            I grilled pork chops coated with olive oil, salt, paprika, garlic and herbs, chopped garlic, honey and vinegar. I had one with a potato and gravy while watching Gomer Pyle. 

            In this story a very aggressive and dominant female corporal named Carol collides with Gomer just after he leaves a phone call with his girlfriend. Lou Ann has just returned after having been away for a few weeks and Gomer is smiling because he's happy about meeting her tonight. Carol asks why he's grinning and he starts talking about hearing that one girl's voice and how his long wait is over but doesn't mention Lou Ann. Carol thinks he is talking about her and declaring love at first sight. Since Carol is new on the base he recommends the Blue Bird Café which happens to be where he's meeting Lou Ann that night. Carol thinks he is inviting her. Later Gomer is early to meet Lou Ann but Carol shows up. She is so forceful and Gomer is too polite to turn her down when she drags him off to a drive-in movie. He calls Lou Ann from the theatre and tells her that he met a very lonely corporal but he doesn't mention she is female. They reschedule but the next night as Gomer is approaching Lou Ann's booth Carol intercepts him. When Lou Ann hears Carol mention the drive in the night before she leaves. After two days Gomer gets through to Lou Ann by phone and convinces her to let him explain. On the way there he meets Carol but tells her he has to meet Lou Ann to tell her about her. Carol offers to help Gomer explain but he doesn't know that she thinks Gomer means he's going to tell Lou Ann that he's chosen Carol over her. When the three meet before Gomer can speak Lou Ann is told that the best woman won and that Gomer has chosen Carol. Lou Ann leaves and doesn't want to see him again. Finally Gomer explains to Carol that he's not in love with her. Now that she understands Carol offers to really help and this time they knock on Lou Ann's door. Carol uses her Marine ability to force Lou Ann to let them in, to sit on the couch close to Gomer and to put her head on his shoulder. Then Carol turns out the light and leaves. The next day Gomer gives Carol some fucked up advice on how to catch a man. He tells her she should let the man take control. A minute later she takes his advice and pretends to be helpless, thus catching two men at once. 

            Carol was played by Carol Burnett, who was the child of alcoholic parents who left her in the care of her grandmother. They moved to California where Carol studied theatre. She made appearances on Jack Paar, Ed Sullivan and Walter Winchell. She co-starred with Buddy Hackett in the short lived sitcom "Stanley" and was a regular on the game show "Stump the Stars." She was nominated for a Tony for her performance in "Once Upon A Mattress" and reprised the role on TV. She became a very popular regular on the Garry Moore Show. She starred with Julie Andrews in the Emmy winning special "Julie and Carol at Carnegie Hall." She started "The Carol Burnett Show" in 1967. It ran for eleven years and earned 22 Emmy Awards. It was the last successful variety show on television.

September 25, 1991: I'd promised to take care of the baby while Nancy took a day off but I got called to work

Thirty years ago today

            On Wednesday morning I got a call from Ruben about helping make deliveries for The Brick furniture warehouse. I asked Nancy if it was okay because I'd promised to take care of the baby while she took a day off. The driver was supposed to pick me up at 10:00 and while I waited I cared for my daughter. Nancy's father was supposed to babysit after I left but the driver still hadn't come by 11:30. Advald had some errands to run and I was about to tell him he could go when the truck showed up. We made deliveries until 19:00 and then he drove me back. I took care of the baby until Nancy came back and then I went to Bamburgh Plaza to buy some food and the newspapers.

Marian McCargo

            On Thursday after midnight I did my usual search for bedbugs and was encouraged to have found none once again. It's been a week since I found the last one, which may have either been dead or sick and immobile.

            When I got up at 2:00 to pee I figured out a way to put a bucket under the drip by propping one side of it up with two of my fossil rocks on top of one another on the radiator casing, putting them on the same level as the window ledge. 

            When I got up my arm didn't hurt as much as on the previous morning. When I did my exercise of stretching a bicycle tube (looped at one end around my foot and the other around my hand) straight up I was able to fully extend my arm once. 

            I finished memorizing "U.S.S.R. / U.S.A." by Serge Gainsbourg and looked for the chords but no one had posted them. I worked out the first one. 

            I weighed 89.1 kilos before breakfast. Just before 10:00 I logged onto the Zoom meeting of my first US Literature tutorial and hopefully the last one online. 

            Our TA Sarah looks very young but she's a PHD student. Her dissertation is on US pastoral literature and how we mourn the loss of a stable environment through literature and art. This is her second year of doing tutorials and so because of covid all of her tutorials have been online. Next week will be her first time running a tutorial in person. She was proud to show us that she wears crocks. They've recently become cool again while they were uncool before. Outside of her PHD she is writing a book about the legacy of abandoned uranium mines. Because of this she will be going to the Czech Republic for two weeks during the semester and Daniel Bergman will be her substitute. 

            She had an attendance question asking each student to state their program and year of study and to show their mood by picking one of nine photographs of dogs. I picked the dog that looked bored, intelligent and skeptical. I was the second one called but everyone after me stated their pronouns. I wasn't specifically asked but I would have said "It." 

            Code of conduct: Respect, care for and dignify one another because there is so much negativity in the world. This is a safe space with zero tol for racism, sexism and homophobia. 

            Give her two biz days to respond to emails. No questions about an assignment a day before it's due. She has no specific office hour but will rather set them up around assignments. 

            Participation is 20% of our grade. Our marks for each tutorial are out of three. We get one mark for being there and one or two depending on degree of participation. If we don't come to tutorial we can submit a maximum 250 word response. We are not expected to read every word of the text. 

            I asked if we are only supposed to read Frederick Douglass's narrative or the whole book which also has the name of the narrative. She said just the narrative. 

            The key words around Douglass are authentication, kinship, the primal scene, witness and education. 

            I stated that I find the words "America" and "American" offensive, arrogant, inaccurate and lazy when used exclusively in reference to the United States of America and its products and citizens. I said calling the United States of America "America" is like calling the united links of a bicycle chain "a bicycle." The founders of that country knew it wasn't America and that can be seen in how their alternative names were "The United States of North America" and "The United Colonies." 

            There was a question for the group of thirteen of us to think about and answer. After witnessing brutal abuse Douglass notes an inability to commit it to paper. How does sound work? What passages cite ways in which words and language fail? 

            I said in the songs he wasn't sure he understood. Their meaning was indirect and coded like all art but perhaps moreso in this case. The songs needed to be repeated and digested. The sound of the whip. Sounds are misread and misinterpreted. 

            Who are grieveable subjects? Whose death counts? A book called Precarious Life by Judith Butler. We choose whom to mourn or what groups to mourn. The 3000 who died in 9-11 over hundreds of thousands that have died in other circumstances. 

            Our tutorial room will be B203 at University College. She said second floor but "B" sounds like the basement. 

            I weighed 89.1 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride and it was cool enough to wear an open long sleeved shirt over my tank top. I went to Yonge and Bloor and on the way back I stopped at Freshco. The green grapes were on sale and I got five bags. I also bought two half pints of raspberries, a pint of strawberries, a whole chicken, five year old cheddar, two cans of peaches, Greek yogourt, skyr, two bags of kettle chips and some baking soda toothpaste. I weighed 88.9 kilos when I got home. 

            I finished typing my tutorial notes at 19:00. 

            I read a little over half of Ralph Waldo Emerson's "Self Reliance." It says the individual should live in the moment and not conform even to one's own past self but to always listen to the most inner voice. He declares that those that follow the deep self of the individual find the most commonality with humanity. 

            I had a potato with gravy and my last steak while watching Gomer Pyle. 

            In this story a renowned artist is coming to Camp Henderson to pick one Marine as the subject for a Marine recruiting poster. Sergeants Carter and Hacker each think they should be the one to pose for the painting. When they learn the artist has arrived and is visiting with the colonel they are each trying outmanoeuvre the other to get the artist's attention. They are surprised to see that the painter is a woman named Leslie Forbes. Everyone is supposed to go about their daily lives while Leslie walks around and observes the activities on the base. Carter and Hacker begin to perform to get her attention and they both pick on Gomer when they want to demonstrate their authoritativeness. When Leslie starts sketching Carter's platoon Carter and Gomer are sure that she has chosen Carter. Carter becomes impatient and asks Gomer to go to Leslie's studio to look at the painting and report back to him. But when Gomer goes there he is disappointed to see that the portrait is of him. Leslie has chosen Gomer because she feels his ability to take criticism in stride embodies the spirit of the Marines. He tells Leslie that it should be Sergeant Carter because he more truly embodies the Marines than he does and has watched over him since boot camp. On the day of the unveiling everyone is surprised and Carter is disappointed that the picture is of Gomer but behind Gomer is a shadow with an eye. Leslie explains that it's the watchful eye of Sergeant Carter and now Carter is proud of his presence in the painting.

            Leslie Forbes was played by Marion McCargo, who went to the same finishing school as Jacqueline Bouvier, the future Jackie Kennedy. She started out as a tennis player before acting. Her first film was "Dead Heat On A Merry Go Round" and that was also Harrison Ford's first movie. She played Harriet Roberts on Falcon Crest and her son William Moses played Cole in the same series. In 1970 she married Congressman Alphonzo Bell and retired from acting to become a political wife. I finished reading "Self Reliance."

September 14, 1991: I drove Mike Copping's car along Church Street so he could check out the hookers

Thirty years ago today

            On Tuesday morning I went to Yamaha where I met Ray and Gary. We unloaded the grand pianos that were on the back of a trailer and I learned how to assemble them. Then Gary left and Ray and I unloaded the rest of the pianos. We finished early. 

            Nancy wasn't home when I got back to her house. I changed and went to my place where I mopped the floors and worked on some projects. 

            I called Mike Copping and we made a date to go see "The Fisher King" that night. Nancy phoned and told me she might be able to make it. I went early to buy the tickets but I was told not to line up until 20:45. I went to the Brass Rail for a while and came out at 20:00. The line up had already started and Mike came half an hour later. We enjoyed a conversation and Mike leant me $15. The film was fantastic! 

            After the movie Mike had me drive his car up and down Church Street so he could check out the hookers. Then I drove it up to Nancy's place in Scarborough.