Saturday, 20 August 2022

Porky Pig


            On Friday morning I memorized the second verse of "C'est comment qu'on freine" (That's How You Slam on the Brakes) by Serge Gainsbourg. 
            I weighed 85.5 kilos before breakfast. 
            Around midday, I cleaned the window frame for my southern kitchen window. Then I cleaned the inside of the two big non-removable glass parts of the window. Next, I'll clean the outside but I needed some more sprayable window cleaner for that and so I went to the hardware store and got a vinegar-based bottle of Windex. I probably won't have time to do the outside of the window until Sunday. 
            I weighed 85.5 kilos before lunch. 
            In the afternoon I started out on a bike ride but it began raining while I was climbing Brock Avenue and so I turned around at College and went home. It never did fully break out raining. 
            I weighed 85.6 kilos at 16:30. 
            I reviewed the last four videos of me playing my song "Sixteen Tons of Dogma". On July 12 the take that starts at 17:00 is one of the best; on July 13 the take at 16:30 was also one of the best but the chords in the epilogue were not exactly right; on July 14 and 15 I screwed up the epilogue. There are a handful of takes that I've noted as the best of the bunch, and so I'll hopefully make a choice from among those tomorrow. 
            In the Movie Maker project for my song "Instructions for Electroshock Therapy", for most of the line, "keep your finger there until the shock is done" there is a video of the shock switch being flicked and held on a shock therapy machine. But the video ends before I sing "done" and so I synchronized the concert video with the studio audio for that word. They go out of synch again for the line, "Secure the jaw and force the shoulders down" but I'm pretty sure I have some video that will fit that line. 
            I sorted through the last of my writing files and now all the transcriptions of the Gumby Bible that I have are in one folder while the original copies that I have are in another. Most of the originals are in order but I have to organize the transcriptions chronologically. 
            I had a potato with gravy and a chicken leg while watching four Bugs Bunny cartoons from 1964. These are also the last of the Bugs Bunny cartoons to appear as theatrical shorts and there are no more original appearances of Bugs Bunny until 1976 when TV specials start being produced. 
            The first story is the final appearance of the Tasmanian Devil in a theatrical short. All of the animals have run away because the Tasmanian Devil is approaching, except for Bugs Bunny. Bugs is taking a bath in a stream and is covered in suds when the Devil pours a bucket of water to rinse him off. The Devil pours ketchup on Bugs's head and he thinks he's bleeding. He tells the Devil to get him a doctor and so the Devil runs to the nearest clinic where the doctor is Bugs Bunny. But Bugs treats the Devil like a patient. He puts spotted glasses on him and asks if he sees spots. Then he holds up a cubist painting and tells him to look in the mirror. Then he puts a television in front of him and says, "Let's see what the fluoroscope shows us." On the screen is a western movie featuring a cowboy and a First Nations person fighting. Bugs says, "Your hormones are fighting your capillaries." Bugs says he has a wonder drug for him and he feeds him nitroglycerine, then tells him he should shake well. After the explosion the Devil goes after Bugs again and this time bugs is disguised as a German psychiatrist who puts the Devil on an analyst's couch. The devil starts talking about his childhood but Bugs says the time is up. He packs the Devil into a briefcase and mails him. After a quick trip around the world, he returns. He chases Bugs to a hospital where Bug comes out of the maternity ward disguised as a nurse and hands the Devil a bundle and so the Devil gives the nurse a cigar. The bundle is a bomb that explodes but then Bugs's cigar also explodes and then Bugs wonders if the Tasmanian Devil is really as dumb as he looks. The Devil comes after Bugs and this time Bugs is disguised as a surgeon. He gets the Devil to hand him several instruments and then he shouts, "He'll live! I've done it!" The Devil wonders what he's done. Then a big hand grabs him and beats him up. Then the Frankenstein's monster goes after Bugs and he is beaten as well. 
            The second story is set in France in 1917. The French forces draw straws to select the pilot that will go after the German ace, Baron Sam Von Schmam, and Porky Pig is selected. But at dawn, as Porky is preparing to go, Bugs Bunny knocks him out and takes his place. He flies over Germany and drops a challenge to Sam. Sam has trouble starting his plane and once he gets it going it starts rolling without him. Once Sam is in the air, as he approaches, Bugs rises into the clouds but then Sam hits a mountain. Sam gets another plane but this time Bugs gets behind him and his propellor grinds Sam's plane to dust. Sam gets up in another plane and starts firing a machine gun at Bugs. But Bugs manoeuvres all around him, until Sam shoots his own plane apart. Then Sam gets another plane and flies above Bugs to bomb him, but when he opens the bomb bay door, Sam falls through as well and hits the ground when the bombs do. Then Sam rises up to the sky as a hell's angel, with a devil suit, a harp, and wings. 
            In the third story, Big Bad Wolf and his nephew are trying to catch Bugs again by disguising themselves as rabbits and opening the Club Del Conejo (The Rabbit Club). Bugs sees through the scam from the start but decides to play along. He goes to the clubhouse and signs up, then Big Bad tells him to go over there and ring that bell, and then someone will show him to the initiation room. It's one of those bells that one hits down on but Bugs keeps hitting it from the side. There is a safe suspended above and Big Bad's nephew is waiting to hear the bell before he drops the safe. Big Bad goes to show Bugs how to ring the bell and he gets hit by the safe. The next trap is an open iron maiden that will be closed when the nephew opens the door in response to Big Bad saying "Now." Bugs is told he has to take a club picture and to stand by the door. But once again Big Bad gets caught in his own trap. Next Bugs is asked to crawl through a hole behind which is secretly the mouth of a cannon. But Bugs paints a second hole and gets Big Bad to crawl through the real one, then his nephew fires and he goes through the wall. Bugs switches the holes before Big Bad returns and the wolf picks the other hole, only to crash through the wall again. Next Bugs is told to step inside a big hollow tree. As Big Bad is filling the hole with dynamite, Bugs is climbing out on a limb and then to another tree. As the first tree explodes it falls on Big Bad's house. 
            In the fourth story, in the Klondike, Daffy Duck finds out that trappers are getting big money for pelts and so he goes after Bugs. But as soon as Daffy goes out into the bush, winter suddenly falls. Bugs builds a rabbit out of snow to fool Daffy and it works. Daffy starts hitting the snow bunny and underneath is a bear. Daffy confronts Bugs and says he wants his pelt. Bugs says he gets all his suits from the same tailor as the Duke of Windsor. Bugs puts a carrot in Daffy's gun and it backfires. Daffy gets chased by another bear and Bugs directs him to a cave, which he plugs once the bear is inside with him. Then Daffy gets caught in an avalanche. Daffy puts dynamite down Bugs's hole but the hole moves behind Daffy, Bugs puts the explosives there and then the hole moves away. Bugs climbs a tree and Bugs sets a fire below but the fire melts the snow onto Daffy and it freezes him solid. Bugs breaks out and tries to get the gun from his frozen effigy but it fires in his face. Daffy sends a giant snowball down the mountain but it misses Bugs and goes up a ramp to fly back over and land on Daffy. Daffy is attacked by several bears and he climbs a tree. Bugs decides to hibernate while it looks like Daffy is stuck in a tree for the rest of the winter. 
            Porky Pig was the first Warner Brothers cartoon character to become popular and he is still used to this day, even though the star of the studio later became Bugs Bunny. He was originally presented as only seven years old but later appeared in stories as an adult. His first appearance was in "I Haven't Got a Hat" in 1935. He got his stutter because the first actor that did his voice, John Dougherty, actually was a stutterer. 
            While I was writing in my journal I dozed off and woke up when my head hit the monitor and my nose hit the keyboard. There was no damage to me or my equipment.
            I searched for bedbugs and didn't find any.

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