Virgil Ross

            On Wednesday morning I finished memorizing the first half of "Sermonette" by Boris Vian. 

            I finished posting my translation of "Suicide" by Serge Gainsbourg." 

            I weighed 84.7 kilos before breakfast. Lighter than yesterday, which was also the lightest in more than two weeks. 

            In the late morning I washed the middle drawer of my plastic storage cabinet. 

            Around midday I called Sahara Sprachlan and we chatted for the first time in years. I unintentionally frightened her a bit when I said, "You're looking good!" She asked, "Are you in the room?" I said, "No, the camera on your phone is on." When she exclaimed, "What?" I immediately assured her I was kidding. We talked for almost an hour and it was good to hear she's in much better health than she was the last time I saw her. It was pleasant getting in touch with her again. 

            I sorted through most of the papers in the bottom drawer of my plastic cabinet. 

            I weighed 85.3 kilos before lunch. I had saltines with five-year-old cheddar and a glass of limeade. 

            I took a siesta and when I woke up, I started getting ready for my bike ride until I realized that I'd misjudged the time again. I'd gotten up half an hour early, so I went back to bed. I ended up sleeping for an extra fifteen minutes, but since I was already half ready for my ride, I didn't lose much time. I rode downtown and back. 

            I weighed 84.5 kilos at 17:15. 

            I was caught up on my journal just before 18:00. 

            I reviewed four videos of me playing my song "Sixteen Tons of Dogma." On June 8 I hit the chords wrong sometimes; on June 9 I flubbed a couple of chords in the middle; on June 10 my playing was a little bit off in moments. June 11 was not bad but the epilogue might have been a little off. 

            In the Movie Maker project for my song "Instructions for Electroshock Therapy", to correspond with the line, "Multiply the patient's current by the machine's resistance" I inserted a clip of a pointer rod indicating the current meter on an old shock therapy machine. Following that line, Brian Haddon sings "shock therapy" and so I added one of the two clips I have of him isolated and singing that phrase in concert, and this time I added the effect of the camera panning from left to right. The next line that I sing is, "Then subtract from the meter voltage" and so I matched that with another clip of the old shock machine with the pointer indicating the voltage meter. In the next line I ask, "Is all this making sense?" and I'm hoping I will be able to synchronize the concert video with the studio audio for that line. After that, Brian answers my question with a slow and cold, "No!" but I have no video of him doing it and he doesn't want to shoot new footage and so I will have to take his place and film myself lip-synching his voice as he says the word. 

            I sorted through some more of the eighth file folder of my writing and divided it up between the 1993-1996 folder and the 1996-2000 folder. It's not always easy to discern whether a poem goes in one or the other, so I just have to guess. Judging from some of the old poems, I sure was angry at women at one point. 

            I made pizza on a slice of Bavarian sandwich bread with Basilica sauce and extra old cheddar. I had it with a can of Helles Lager while watching four Bugs Bunny cartoons from 1957. 

            In the first story, Bugs Bunny has wound up harvested and crated with some carrots and dropped by a plane into Tasmania. Here he once again encounters the Tasmanian Devil but it's as if he hasn't heard of the beast. He looks it up and sees a long list of animals the devil likes to eat and says, "What, no rabbits?" Then the devil's hand reaches from behind to turn the page where it says, "Especially rabbits." Bugs tells him he's not a rabbit but a monkey and begins to imitate one because they are not on the list. Bugs runs, but the devil eventually catches him and says, "What for you say you monkey when you got little powder puff tail like rabbit, rabbit?" Next, we see Bugs tied up and, on a plate, with an apple in his mouth. The devil salts and peppers Bugs, and the pepper makes him sneeze and shoot away the apple. The devil is tossing a big salad, but Bugs tells him that salads don't go well with rabbit. He says any gourmet knows you serve a salad with wild turkey surprise. "Too bad I'm all tied up or I'd cook you up a batch." The devil unties him. Next, we see Bugs imitating an Italian waiter and taking the order for one wild turkey surprise. Then pretending to be an Italian chef while singing "Atsa Matta For You", Bugs disguises three dynamite sticks as a turkey, lights them and feeds them to the devil. It explodes inside him. The devil chases Bugs and Bugs runs into a Trader Macs where he acquires a mop, a bear trap, a dress and some lipstick. He removes the mop head from the handle and uses it for a wig; puts the bear trap in his mouth for teeth, puts on lipstick and the dress and spins out into the view of the devil. The Tasmanian devil recognizes what he sees to be a Tasmanian She-devil. He approaches Bugs, who says, "John!" The devil says, "Marsha!" They kiss and John gets the beartrap clamped over his mouth just as the devil's wife comes and starts hitting him over the head with a rolling pin. 

            In the second story, Bugs makes a home beneath the floorboards of an apartment. Then the apartment is occupied by the gangsters Rocky and Mugsy as they are escaping from the cops after a jewelry store robbery. Uncharacteristic of the pre-1950 Bugs Bunny, he decides to be a hero and teach the crooks that crime does not pay. He begins by speaking into Rocky's ear while he is half asleep and sowing doubt in his mind about the loyalty of the stupidly faithful Mugsy. He says Mugsy is pretending to be sleeping while he's getting ideas. Rocky goes over and slaps Mugsy several times, then tells him not to get any ideas. Mugsy says, "You know I never have ideas!" Then while Mugsy is sleeping, Bugs puts a hatchet into his hand and warns Rocky with the voice in his head. Rocky takes the hatchet and swings it at Mugsy. From above the ceiling, Bugs starts unscrewing the big light that's hanging over Rocky's head. Mugsy sees it about to fall and rushes to get up on a stepladder with a screwdriver to fix it. But it falls on Rocky and Rocky sees Mugsy above him with a screwdriver. Rocky has gone to sleep with the ever-present cigarette in his mouth, but Bugs replaces it with a stick of dynamite and then imitating Rocky's voice he says to Mugsy, "Come here. Give me a light!" Mugsy obediently lights the dynamite, and it explodes. Rocky ties Mugsy up and puts him in another room. Bugs saws a hole around Rocky's chair and he falls through the floor, then he puts the saw in Mugsy's hand, even though he's still tied up. Rocky says, "I don't know how yaz done it, but yaz done it!" Then he beats Mugsy up. Bugs puts roller skates on Mugsy's feet and then gets under the floorboards with a big magnet to cause Mugsy to repeatedly roll and slam into Rocky while Rocky keeps knocking him back. While this is going on the cops arrive because Bugs has made a big neon sign at the front of the building saying, "Rocky's Hideaway." 

            The cartoon "Bugsy and Mugsy" was animated by Virgil Ross, who started animating for Charles B Mintz, then Ub Iwerks, and then Walter Lantz, where he worked on Oswald Rabbit. He worked there with Tex Avery and when Tex moved to Merry Melodies and Loony Tunes in 1935, Ross went with him. He worked thirty years there and is most closely associated with Bugs Bunny. He animated "A Wild Hare" which most consider to be the first official appearance of Bugs Bunny. It was nominated for an Academy Award. 

            In the third story, a small town in the Alps offers a prize of 50,000 cronkites to whomever climbs the Schmatterhorn. There are no volunteers until Yosemite Sam steps forward. But then Bugs Bunny also hears about the prize and decides to climb as well. He passes Sam easily, but Sam pulls him back down and inadvertently gets flattened by a boulder. Sam offers to be partners with Bugs and says for him to tie the rope to himself while he climbs to the next level and pulls him up. But he ties the other end of the rope to a boulder and sends it down to Bugs, but somehow the other end is now tied to Sam, and he falls. Sam tries to push an even bigger boulder down on Bugs but it rolls backward towards him. He jumps off the cliff to the next landing to escape but the boulder lands on his head. When Sam catches up with Bugs he begins shouting, but Bugs warns him he'll start an avalanche. Since the snow is above Bugs's head he decides to deliberately cause an avalanche, but it falls on Sam. Sam chases Bugs up the cloud covered mountain until Bugs realizes they've reached the top. Sam pushes Bugs off and thinks he's made it but somehow, he has climbed to the top of the Eiffel Tower. 

            In the fourth story, Elmer Fudd receives a large crate from his Uncle Judd Fudd. Inside is a large Slobovian rabbit named Millicent. Judd says he will pay Elmer $500 to take care of her while he's away. But Millicent is unhappy, and Elmer learns that Slobovian rabbits require another rabbit for company. It is winter and Bugs Bunny is starving and so Elmer easily catches Bugs with a carrot. He puts Bugs in Millicent's room and suddenly she perks up. She closes her eyes and says for Bugs to kiss her. He grabs a goldfish from a bowl and puts it to Millicent's mouth. She loves it but the fish grabs a gun and shoots itself. Bugs tries to get out the door, but she pulls him back in under it. He tells her that women don't chase men in America. She wants to get married right away. Bugs smashes through the window, but Elmer brings him back in at gunpoint. She closes her eyes and asks for another kiss. Bugs puts a rotating fan in her face, and she says, "Not bad for beginner!" Bugs suggests they elope. He puts a rope of sheets out the window and says ladies first, then he lets go and lets her drop. Millicent is banging on the door downstairs. Bugs goes into Elmer's bedroom in the dark and wakes him up, saying Uncle Judd's at the door. He says, "Here, slip on this bathrobe." But it's a bunny suit and when Elmer opens the door Millicent falls for him. He runs outside but she goes after him and chases him down the road. 

            Before bed I searched for bedbugs but didn't find any.