Kathryn Hahn

            On Wednesday after midnight I lint-rolled the curtains between the bedroom and the living room, the top of my bed and the pillow and picked up a few of bedbugs from the curtains and a couple from the bed. I shook out my sheet and comforter on the deck. I turned the heat on before going to bed at 1:30. I slept until almost 3:00 when I got up to pee then I slept until the 5:00 alarm. After yoga there were no bedbugs on the walls or on the baseboards around my bed. 

            I memorized the fourth verse of “Yes Man” by Serge Gainsbourg and revised my translation of all but the last line. There are two verses left. 

            I played my Gibson Les Paul Studio during song practice and it stayed in tune about half the time. 

            I weighed 90.9 kilos before lunch, which is the lightest I’ve been in the early afternoon since October 13. I had peanut butter and five-year-old cheddar on saltines with a glass of lemonade. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride but it started raining and so I only went as far as Bathurst and Bloor. It stopped raining while I was going south on Bathurst but it started again when I was almost home. 

            I weighed 90.55 kilos at 18:00. 

            I was caught up in my journal at 18:38. 

            I digitized a cassette recording of a rehearsal of my songs “Spool of the Moon” and “Snow on a Poppy” with Steve Lowe. We spent a lot of time on “Snow On a Poppy” because it was hard to communicate with just my voice how I wanted the song played on guitar. 

            I made pizza on a slice of multigrain sandwich bread with Marinara, tomato pesto, potato wedges, and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a glass of Creemore while watching the first episode of Wanda Vision with my daughter Astrid on Discord. 

            The first episode is styled like a 50s sitcom other than the fact that Wanda is a witch and Vision is an android who can pass through walls. In many ways it’s like the 60s sitcom Bewitched. The opening segment has them in their wedding clothes arriving at their new house in Westview, New Jersey. Vision tries to carry Wanda over the threshold but he walks through the wall and she hits it and falls on the outside. 

            Like any 50s sitcom housewife Wanda doesn’t work. She offers Vision a big breakfast even though he doesn’t eat. They notice on the calendar that today’s date has a heart on it but neither wants to admit to the other that they don’t know what it signifies. 

            Vision goes to work at Computational Services where he is known as “Vision” but no one knows he’s a super powered android even though he works at super speed. He is exceptionally proficient at his job although he has no idea what his company does and neither does anyone else. He learns that the heart on his calendar is there because he has invited his boss Mr. Hart and his wife home for dinner.

            Meanwhile Wanda’s neighbour Agnes comes to welcome Wanda to the neighbourhood. She helps her conclude that the heart on the calendar means it’s hers and Visions anniversary although they don’t seem to remember when they got married. Agnes gives Wanda some anniversary hints and so when he comes home with his boss and his boss’s wife she comes out in her night gown. Vision fumbles an explanation that Wanda’s dress and behaviour is Sokovian as she’s from Europe. Mrs. Hart finds it exotic. 

            When Wanda realizes she now needs to cook dinner for four, Agnes shows up through the kitchen back door with raw ingredients. Wanda pushes Agnes out and begins to magically float ingredients and utensils around the room. Wanda doesn’t seem to have full control over her powers as she burns a chicken, tries to correct that and turns it into a basket of eggs. The lobsters escape and the steak fails and so Wanda instantaneously serves breakfast for dinner. 

            Hart begins asking questions about their past but they are silent and so he gets frustrated with them and begins choking on his food. After Hart collapses Vision uses his powers to reach inside of Hart and pull out the obstruction. The Harts leave happy. Wanda and Vision decide to make this date their anniversary. 

            We see them from the point of view of someone watching Wanda Vision on TV and taking notes.

            The second episode is still in black and white and set in the 60s. 

            Wanda and Vision are sleeping in twin beds when they hear noises outside the house but are too frightened to investigate. After the noises go away Wanda magically makes the two beds into one. 

            The next day they rehearse their magic act for a neighbourhood talent show with Vision as the magician and Wanda as his lovely assistant. 

            Vision goes to a neighbourhood watch meeting. After Wanda kisses him goodbye she sees a red toy helicopter on the hedge. It’s the only colour we or she has seen in this black and white world. 

            She runs into her neighbour Agnes who takes her to a planning committee meeting at the home of Dottie Jones who is the dominant personality of the neighbourhood, kind of like an adult Mean Girl.

            At the neighbourhood watch meeting Vision is offered a piece of gum which he accidentally swallows, gumming up his inner android mechanisms. It causes him to behave as if he is drunk. 

            After the planning committee meeting Dottie’s radio suddenly asks Wanda who is behind her situation. Dottie’s wine glass breaks and we see red blood on her black and white hand. 

            As Vision arrives to perform the magic act with Wanda he is too stoned by the gum in his works to not use his powers and so Wanda has to secretly use magic to cover up his powers and make it appear like they are tricks. Such as when Vision starts to fly she conjures up cables attached to him. Their act is a big hit with the neighbours. Wanda uses magic to detect the gum in Vision’s body and remove it.

            When Wanda and Vision get home they discover that she is suddenly pregnant. They hear noises outside and see a beekeeper climbing out of the sewer cover outside their house. Disturbed by this Wanda rewinds the story to before they heard the noise. Suddenly their world becomes a 70s colour sitcom. 

            Agnes is played by Kathryn Hahn, who earned a bachelors degree in Theatre from Northwestern University. She then studied at the Yale School of Drama. She made her TV debut on the children’s puppet show Hickory Hideout. She made her film debut in Flushed in 1999. She was noticed by an NBC casting director while performing at the Williamstown Theatre Festival and the character of Lily in the TV series Crossing Jordon was created for her. She appeared in all but two episodes of the series. She appeared in 10 episodes of Parks and Recreation, She co-starred in the series Transparent, I Love Dick, Happyish, Wanda Vision, The Studio, The Shrink Next Door, She starred in the series Mrs. Fletcher, Agatha All Along (for which she won an Emmy Award), Tiny Beautiful Things, She starred in Afternoon Delight, Private Life, She co-starred in The Last Mimzy, Revolutionary Road, The Goods, Wanderlust, Len and Company, The Do Over, Flower, We’re the Millers, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Bad Words, This is Where I Leave You, Tomorrowland, The Visit, She’s Funny That Way, Captain Fantastic, Glass Onion, Bad Moms, A Bad Moms Christmas, Hotel Transylvania 4, Into the Spiderverse, and Fixed. She made her Broadway debut in Boeing Boeing in 2008.