Tidying Up

On Tuesday morning I finished translating “Bébé Gai” by Serge Gainsbourg. It seems to be from the point of view of someone whose tongue is out of control but the boys enjoy it.

            I worked on my journal.

            The morning go away from me again and so my plan to wash the middle part of the east side of my bedroom floor fell through because it would have taken a couple of hours. Instead I just tidied up the area and found places for all the things that were cluttering up the to and the inside of the middle dresser. Then I washed the dresser and vacuumed all the cat hair and dust bunnies from the floor. So progress was made after all.

            I had a can of chickpeas with flaxseed oil and garlic for lunch.

            I tried to take a siesta but I couldn’t sleep and so I just stayed in bed for 45 minutes.

            I finished editing the video of my rehearsal of “Strip Tease” by Serge Gainsbourg. I’ll upload it to YouTube on Wednesday, even the background noise from traffic was extremely loud during that song.

            I did my afternoon exercises while listening to Amos and Andy. In this story Kingfish learns that Andy has acquired an 1877 nickel that’s worth $250 but he’s been holding onto it in case of an emergency rather than cashing it in. He carries it around in a little purse in his pants. Kingfish has to figure a way to get Andy to take his pants off so he can get the coin. He tells Andy that he’s teaching a physical culture course and that he has to lose weight. He gets him to strip down to his long underwear and to close his eyes while exercising. Kingfish gets the coin and tells him that’s enough for the day. Kingfish heads for the drugstore to call the coin dealer but he’s so excited that he puts the rare nickel in the slot. Kingfish doesn’t want to get caught breaking into the phone and so he goes back to Andy to tell him that he took the coin to protect him because it will soon be against the law to sell old coins. He gets Andy to try to break into the payphone but there happens to be an off duty cop in the drug store. Kingfish and Andy go to jail but in court the next day the arresting officer tells the judge that there really was an 1877 nickel in the phone and so the case is dismissed. When they get out of jail Kingfish tells Andy to call the coin dealer so they can split the $250. Andy puts a nickel into the phone and dials a number but then tells Kingfish he put the rare nickel into the slot. Kingfish angrily tells Andy he wants nothing more to do with him and storms away. The operator tells Andy the number he’s dialled doesn’t exist. Andy says, “I know. Can I get my nickel back please?”

            I worked on my poem series “My Blood in a Bug”.

            It’s interesting when you find nice pictures of a porn star you’ve never heard of and you try to track down new pictures of them you find out they are now old and fat but still doing porn.

            I had three small potatoes, a sautéed yellow pepper, two lamb chops and gravy while watching the first three episodes of the latest season of South Park. This whole season seems to be about Stan Marsh’s Tegridy Marijuana farm because they’ve changed the theme song lyrics to being about Tegridy Farms.

            In the first story Randy notices that his marijuana sales have dropped because a lot of his regular customers have decided to grow their own. Randy feels betrayed and takes revenge by calling ICE on the Mexicans his friends have working for them. When Cartman learns one can call ICE and have people taken away he calls them on the Broflovskis. Kyle is taken to separate facility with the Mexican children. Kyle tells the administrators at the facility that by traumatizing Mexican children they may be creating the next Mexican Joker. The ICE guys become paranoid and afraid of the Joker but they don’t release the children until after Kyle converts them all to Judaism. They can’t detain Jews because that would be racist.

            In the second story Randy gets the idea that there are a lot of people in China and that the population there are an untapped market for his marijuana business. He innocently goes there with a suitcase full of pot and is arrested at customs. He is tortured in prison and forced to work in a factory to make cheap items for export. Meanwhile Stan, frustrated with life on the marijuana farm forms a death metal band called Crimson Dawn with Jimmy, Butters and Kenny. A big producer hears them at a festival and wants to sign them. They are excited about making an album but the producer tells them there are no albums anymore and what they need is a biopic. But all their lyrics and the screenplay have to meet the approval of China because that’s the biggest market for any commercial enterprise. They can’t mention that they live in a free country because that’s offensive to the Chinese and they definitely can’t mention Winnie the Pooh because people say he looks like the Chinese leader. Meanwhile Winnie the Pooh seems to be also in prison in China. Randy convinces the Chinese to let him go. Pooh is also released and locates some honey but it’s a trap set by Randy, who comes up behind Pooh and strangles him to death. Randy goes home.

            In the third story Randy is bragging about how he got $300,000 in a marijuana deal with China. But China didn’t buy Randy’s pot for people to smoke but so they could plant it on protesters and put them in prison. The main theme of the third episode is immunization. Cartman is deathly afraid of needles and has never had his shots. Whenever a doctor approaches him with a needle Cartman strips naked, covers himself with grease so he can’t be caught and runs around squealing like a pig. The school insists that every student must be immunized but finally Cartman finds a legal and comes forward as a conscientious objector. His mother helps him and one of the main excuses not to be immunized is that the internet says that the shots can make a person “artistic”. A world champion pig wrangler is hired to catch Cartman. He is captured and put in a pen and is going to be part of a rodeo in which pig wranglers chase children that don’t want to immunized, rope them and give them a shot. Meanwhile Cartman’s mother goes to smoke a joint with Randy and they reflect on their roles as parents and what they’ve done wrong. Then she makes a decision and heads for the arena. She starts knocking out all the wranglers that are after Cartman but one has finally roped him. He brings the needle in just as Mrs Cartman gets between them and she is immunized instead. In the end Cartman is told that the dosage his mother received had serious side effects for her. He goes to see her and finds her painting a picture. Immunization has made her artistic.

            I had two beers over the course of the night.