Gale Gordon

            On Friday morning I went to bed after 2:30 because I had dozed off earlier as usual while trying to write my journal. With all the cleaning up I had to do after supper and the meticulous tooth and gum maintenance I do these days I had no choice but to stay up until those things were done. Even after going to bed I was awake for a while and despite the carpet tape that circled my mattress there were still a few bedbugs that got through. It was interesting that while I was lying there the ones that I killed one after the other took the same route up the right side of my stomach. There were fewer bedbugs than usual on the walls when I checked later and a few more had gotten caught on the tape. 

            After yoga I finished translating “L'enfance de bonnot” (Bonnot’s Childhood). Since no one has posted the audio there are no chords to work out. 

            I worked out the chords for the intro and half the chorus of “Shylock” by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            I weighed 91.15 kilos before breakfast. 

            I played my Kramer during song practice for the first of two sessions and it stayed in tune pretty much the whole time. 

            Around midday I used my new vacuum cleaner for the first time to clean my futon. 

            I weighed 92.65 kilos before lunch, which is an early afternoon record high since I’ve been weighing myself. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 91.65 kilos at 18:05. 

            I was still several days behind in my journal and worked on getting caught up. I had a potato with gravy and a piece of roast pork while watching a short YouTube biography of Carol Burnett on Let Me Know, a 1972 appearance of Carol on Johnny Carson and a 1976 appearance along with Lucille Ball, Valerie Harper , and Gale Gordon on The Dinah Show. 

            From Let Me Know: 

            In 1956 Carol co-starred with Buddy Hackett on the sitcom Stanley, which only lasted one season. After it was canceled she became popular on the New York cabaret circuit and in 1960 was nominated for a Tony for her performance in Once Upon a Mattress. She won her second Emmy for her Carnegie Hall special with Julie Andrews. The Carol Burnett Show picked up 23 Emmy Awards during its 11 year run. Carol performed in the play Six Rooms, She was Sesame Street’s first famous guest, and co-starred with Rock Hudson in I Do I Do. She appeared in The Four Seasons, Annie, and Noises Off. She became a regular panelist on Password Plus. In 2001 she married the Hollywood Bowl Orchestra’s principle drummer Brian Miller. After her daughter Carrie died she wrote a memoir called Carrie and Me, the recording of which won a Grammy Award. She continues to perform her one-woman Q and A show.

            Johnny Carson says he’s admired Carol Burnett ever since The Garry Moore Show. He remembers a sketch he did with her on a lifeboat when he guested on the show. Carol says it was 1961. She says they did another sketch in which she played Scarlett O’Hara and Johnny played Rhett Butler. He says, “Then you did Once Upon a Mattress.” “You mean the play?” “That might have been good for you too.” “That’s how it all started”. Carol says the great thing about Once Upon a Mattress is that it appeals to children but there is also some adult humour in it as well. She says the original play has a couple that are expecting a child out of wedlock but in the first TV adaptation they had them be secretly married. Seven years later on the second TV adaptation they brought it back to the original unmarried situation. Johnny talks about how until recently, even in motion pictures they couldn’t show a married couple in bed together. Carol says if they were in the same bed they had to have one foot on the floor whatever good that would do. 

            Johnny asks if during Carol’s questions from the audience segment if she ever gets any real zingers that throw her. Carol says they do about 12 minutes and then edit. She says one woman asked what they polish the stage floor with and Carol told her that was too personal. 

            At that point the audio for that file was gone so I moved on to the Dinah Show. Dinah Shore says they are celebrating the 25th anniversary of television with her special guest Lucille Ball. I think it jumps forward to the couch where she’s already been talking with Lucy and Valerie Harper for a while. Lucy didn’t know Dinah was bringing out her friend Carol Burnett and she is very excited when she hears her name. Carol says there aren’t too many people she’d wear high heels and socks for but she did it for Lucy. Carol first met Lucy on May 12, 1959. They opened Once Upon a Mattress off Broadway and Lucy came to see it on the second night. Carol says she was doing her makeup and when she was told Lucille Ball is in the audience she got lipstick all over her face. After the show Lucy came backstage and they talked for an hour. 

            Lucy gave Carol a baby shower when she was pregnant with her second daughter and the husbands came. Carol says she’d been pregnant for two years and Lucy said, “Maybe it’ll happen if I give you a baby shower”. Lucy’s husband Gary Morton opened all the baby gifts and hilariously insulted each one. Carol went into labour the next day. Dinah says Lucy’s house is the cleanest she’s ever seen. 

            They show a few clips from The Lucy Show of Gale Gordon getting wet in various episodes. Lucy says they became superstitious about it and decided that a show couldn’t be a success unless Gale got wet. Dinah surprises Lucy again by bringing Gale Gordon out. He and Lucy embrace. He says it was always Lucy’s idea for him to get wet but it was worth it to see the look on her face. Lucy says on one show he was in the Colorado River and it was so cold he couldn’t say his lines. Lucy’s nickname for Gale was “Old Soggy Crotch”. He says he’s probably the only person who can’t enjoy a swim now unless he puts on wet bathing trunks first. 

            Gale first worked with Lucy on her radio show My Favourite Husband. When it got reshaped into the TV show I Love Lucy she wanted Gale to play Fred Mertz but while she was pregnant with Lucy, Gale was cast on the show Our Miss Brooks. Dinah says that George Burns said that he could do physical comedy with Lucy that he could never do with Gracie Allen. Carol says you’re not a performer until you’ve had at least one pie in the face. Dinah says she’s never had a pie in the face. 

            Dinah asks Lucy what's the most physical thing she ever did in a performance. She says she went down a real fireman’s pole fast and her heels went right up through her head. Dinah says she did that too and it hurts. Lucy says the most wear and tear she ever suffered was when she was in the water with the porpoises for 45 minutes at Marineland. She says after forty minutes the porpoises were complaining to their trainer about the skit. She says they don’t bite but they poke you with their long, hard snouts and she got it right across the kidneys. 

            Dinah asks Gale if he’s ever wanted to get even with Lucy. He says, “Funny your should ask” and then reaches behind the couch for a spritzer bottle. Lucy shouts, “Oh no!” then stands up an backs away. She sits on Carol and Valerie’s laps but he just says, “All right, all three!” But then he fires and sprays himself. It was obviously staged that way ahead of time. 

            Gale Gordon studied acting under Richard Bennet and began his professional career at the age of 17. He started as a radio actor and met his future wife Virginia when they were both performing on Death Valley Days. They married in 1937 and were together for 58 years until she died. He was the first actor to play Flash Gordon, on the radio series The Amazing Interplanetary Adventures of Flash Gordon. He played Mayor LaTrivia on the radio sitcom Fibber McGee and Molly. He played Rumson Bullard on the spin-off The Great Gildersleeve. He played The Octopus on Speed Gibson. He starred in The Casebook of Gregory Hood. In 1950 he starred in Granby’s Green Acres, which was the basis for the later TV series Green Acres. He co-starred on The Phil Harris-Alice Faye Show. On television he starred in the sitcom The Box Brothers. He co-starred in Sally, Our Miss Brooks, The Lucy Show, Here’s Lucy, Life With Lucy, and Dennis the Menace, He played the landlord on The Danny Thomas Show. He co-starred in Here Come the Nelsons, Don’t Give Up the Ship, The 30 Foot Bride of Candy Rock, Sergeant Deadhead, and The Burbs. Even in his senior years he could do cartwheels. He wrote Nursery Rhymes for Hollywood Babies and Leaves from the Story Tree. He bought 150 acres in Borrego Springs, California where he built much of his house and his art studio. He built and restored his own furniture. He became one of the only commercial carob farmers in the US.