Patricia Kneale

            On Tuesday morning finished posting my translation of “Bourrée de complexes” (Buried in Complexes) by Boris Vian.

I finished memorizing “La ballade de Johnny Jane” by Serge Gainsbourg and started looking for the chords.

The morning got away from me and by the time I’d shaved and showered it was too late to work on my kitchen floor cleaning project.

For lunch I had a sausage and lettuce salad with mayonnaise and ketchup.

            In the afternoon I did my exercises while listening to Amos and Andy. This story was mostly a theme that’s been recycled in this series several times. Kingfish’s mother in law has fallen for a rich man and he for her. This is good for Kingfish because he stands to profit from a marriage between the two. But suddenly Reginald DeWinters breaks off the engagement with Ramona and gets engaged to Maribel Turner, a widow with four children. Kingfish decides that he must somehow break up Reginald’s engagement with Maribel and so he offers Andy $1000 to romance her. Andy agrees and before going to see Maribel he buys a teddy bear for her youngest child, Clarence. But Clarence answers the door and he turns out to be a full grown man with a deep voice. He says his mother isn’t home but he takes the teddy bear. Kingfish tries a different angle. He convinces Reginald that Maribel's husband, who disappeared several years ago and was declared dead, is still alive and out to kill anyone that tries to marry his wife. This works but it works too well because Reginald had planned on breaking up with Maribel and going back to Ramona anyway but now he fears for his life and has left town.

            I took a bike ride. It seems to me that the new bike lane Bloor is generally faster than weaving through traffic. I tend to get home a few minutes earlier than I used to unless there are too many slow cyclists on the lane.

            For dinner I had a potato, two chicken drumsticks and some gravy while watching two episodes of The Adventures of Sir Lancelot. I had to view both these stories online because the ones I’d started downloading weren’t ready yet.

            In the first story Sir Lancelot has just been rescued by his squire Brian from Akelon Castle after having spent over a month in the dungeon there. Brian disguised Lancelot as a baker to get him out and he is still wearing the costume as he returns to Camelot. But at the gates of Camelot a woman who calls herself Lady Lynette of Akelon is arguing with a guard and insisting that she see King Arthur. The guard won’t let her pass until Lancelot intervenes. Lynette asks how a baker could have so much influence and Lancelot explains that he’s a very good baker. Lancelot tells her to wait in the antechamber while he talks with King Arthur. Lancelot tells him about his imprisonment. Arthur wonders why this occurred  when Sir Akelon is a friend. Lancelot says that Akelon is on a pilgrimage and there were false rumours of his death spread by Baron Braynor who wants to marry Akelon’s wife the Lady Eleanor to he can control Akelon’s lands. Lancelot had come to Castle Akelon to reveal the truth when he was imprisoned. He asks Arthur to let him go back to Akelon with Lynette but not to reveal to her his true identity. Lynette bursts in and demands an audience with King Arthur to find a champion to save her sister Eleanor. Arthur tells her to her disappointment that the baker will be her champion. He pretends to make him a knight and dubs him “Sir Crustabread”.  Since she thinks this is Sir Lancelot's first mission as a knight, Lynette is full of advice for him as to what a real knight like Sir Lancelot would do. On the way they meet Sir Gringamore, the fiercest of the baron’s men. They fight on horseback until Lancelot is thrown and then Lancelot fights on foot until he dismounts Gringamore and defeats him. When the castle is in sight Lancelot changes back into his baker’s clothing and explains that this way he has a better chance of sneaking into the castle. Lynette says that knights don’t sneak and that he should carve his way through fifty soldiers to break into the castle like Sir Lancelot would. He leaves Lynette with the horses and goes unarmed to the castle. Lancelot sneaks in and goes to visit the armoury where he reclaims his own sword and shield that had been taken from him when he was imprisoned. Lancelot goes to the bakery and learns that all the bakers would fight against the baron if someone would lead them. He uses his shield as a tray to bring bread to the banquet. It is announced that the wedding will be the next day and the man who presents the bannes says that if anyone objects they must speak now. Lynette comes forward and objects. She says Sir Akelon is alive. Sir Gingamore draws his sword and Lancelot throws his bread at him and draws his sword. The baron surprises Lynette by calling out “Sir Lancelot”. The bakers take care of the rest of the baron’s men while Lancelot defeats the baron. Lynette confesses that she is not Eleanor’s sister and not Lady Lynette but just the maid. Eleanor promotes her to Lady Lynette.

            In the second story King Meliot has imprisoned the able bodied men of Cheddar to sell as slaves to a Saracen ruler. Ellen, the wife of one of the men travels to Camelot to ask for help and Lancelot is sent as their champion. He and Brian bring swords so the people can have weapons against Meliot’s men. They store the swords in the cave where they keep the cheese they make. Lancelot sees that the cave is a maze where anyone but the villagers could get lost. He also learns that the walls reflect and amplify light like the topaz that Ellen wears around her neck. The most important bit of information that Lancelot gathers is that Meliot and his men are afraid of entering the caves and getting lost. Lancelot formulates a plan around that fact. Next Ellen is arrested while trying to bring food for her husband. Lancelot poses as a jewel merchant and goes to see Meliot. He tells him that he’s heard that the caves of Cheddar are rich with gemstones and has proof he tells him of Ellen’s gem. Meliot makes Ellen take him and his men to the caves. Meanwhile Lancelot jumps the guard and releases the prisoners. Meliot and his men are led into the caves and Lancelot and the men follow, taking up the hidden swords. Torches are lit and the reflection off the walls blind Meliot and his men so they are easily defeated.  Lancelot takes Meliot to Arthur for judgement.

            Ellen was played Patricia Kneale, she started out working in Shakespeare and remained mostly a stage actor but also worked in television and film. She was in the cast of “A for Andromeda”