Hillbillies

            On Tuesday morning it had been over two days since Shankar’s network disappeared. Maybe he just needs to reset his modem but I haven’t seen him to bring it up. Fortunately I can access the dlink network, although the signal is weak and so sometimes websites or images load slowly. 

            I memorized the neglected third verse of the original French version of “O Canada" that declares that Canada is an enemy of tyranny. There's just one verse left and then I'll find the chords. I assume the internet is full of different versions of those. 

            During song practice the Rocker electric guitar continues to stay in tune for usually at least three songs like a guitar is supposed to. I still have difficulty adjusting to the different fretboard and finding where to place my fingers. The main problem with this guitar is that the ends of the frets are rough and sharp. When I’m barring cords I’m used to sliding from one chord to another but I can't do it with this guitar because the frets cut into my index finger. I have to learn to lift my hands off the neck in between chords, which is probably what I’m supposed to do in the first place but I'm not used to it and I get cut by the frets. 

            I weighed 89.5 kilos before breakfast. In the late morning I shaved and showered and then after doing the dishes there was no time for me to work on my oven cleaning project. 

            I ran a strip of electrical tape down the neck of the Rocker to cover the ends of the frets that have been cutting into my index finger. It seems to help but only if the tape stays stuck during song practice tomorrow morning I will know whether it works or not.

            I called Remenyi a few times and finally got through to Harold. He said my Washburn guitar is still not back yet but he thinks that it’ll be returned after the lockdown is lifted. I asked about my warranty running out on June first and he said that since my claim was made before June 1 then it will still be valid afterwards. It looks like I'll be stuck playing the electric for at least a couple of more weeks. 

            I weighed 88.9 kilos before lunch. I had a slice of roast pork with barbecue and hot sauce and a glass of grapefruit juice. 

            In the afternoon I was posting my blog and the dlink connection went off a couple of times when I was trying to load photos. It had been almost three days since I couldn’t find Sankar’s network and so I decided it was time to knock on his door. He said he hasn't had access to his own WiFi either but hasn’t really thought about it because he has a different internet connection for his phone. He said he’d look into it and then five minutes later he told me that he'd discovered that a connection had been loose at the back of his modem. He plugged it back in and I was connected again. 

            The delay in posting my blog caused me to take my bike ride more than half an hour later than usual. There were a lot of cyclists out and so I had to ride off the Bloor bike lane a couple of times to pass lines of them. On my way back along Queen there was a jam because they were laying down new streetcar rails between Bay and University and it took at least ten minutes to span the distance. 

            I stopped at Freshco to get cream-cheese and honey and there was a lineup for the first time in months. I got what I was looking for but I also walked around and picked up a few other things. I bought two bags of grapes, an Italian pasta salad, spoon size shredded wheat, piri piri sauce, hapanero sauce, some frozen mini quiches, some frozen samosas, dental floss and some Haagen Dazs ice cream bars. 

            I weighed 88.6 kilos after my bike ride. 

            I worked a bit on my poem series “My Blood in a Bug" but there wasn't a lot of time before dinner. 

            I had a potato, a slice of roast pork and gravy while watching two episodes of Andy Griffith.

            In the first story there is a new minister visiting Mayberry. As Reverend Leighton is an older, distinguished, unmarried gentleman, all of the late middle aged single church ladies are buying new hats and dolling themselves up. There are so many functions for everyone to attend Bee is worried about her hair holding up. Her hairdresser convinces her to try a blond wig and it makes quite an impression with Leighton. But when the reverend’s next sermon urges people to be their natural selves Bee gets worried that she’s doing something wrong. She is afraid to not wear the wig and reveal pretension but when Leighton expresses interest in her and tells her he may be taking over a church in Mount Pilot but he would like to visit Mayberry and her often, she finally confesses that she’s wearing a wig. He thinks nothing of it and that wasn't what he meant by not being oneself. 

            Reverend Leighton was played by Ian Wolfe, who would later become well known as Mama Carlson’s calm but irreverent butler Hirsche on WKRP In Cincinnati. He played Septimus in one Star Trek episode and Mr. Atoz in another. 

            Mrs Larch, one of the church ladies was played by Carol Veazie, who played Mrs Burnside in “Auntie Mame". 

            In the second story the darlings return to town. The boys always stand on the back of the truck and play their instruments and this time we learn that it’s so as to drown out the sound of the engine. The reason they’ve come to Mayberry is that they've struck it rich. They've sold a piece of land for $300 and so now Briscoe is taking advantage of his fortune to find city girls to be brides for his sons. But when he takes the boys out on the street to ogle the passing women they find slim pickings. Andy is relieved to hear they are going to head back to the mountains. But when they drop by to give their regards to Bee an owl lands on the front of their truck. They are superstitious people and they take this as an omen that fits the saying, “If you see an owl at daytime then the next female you see is surely the bride for thee.” It just so happens that the next woman to walk down the street is Helen. Briscoe insists that she is going to be the bride for one of his sons even though Andy tells him she is his girl. Briscoe tells him he can’t argue with an omen. That night the boys serenade Helen in front of her house. Andy pleads with Briscoe again but Briscoe tells him the only thing that could make them stop is the counter omen of another owl appearing in the daytime. Andy realizes the only thing to stop this is to play into their superstitions. Andy tells them to be at his house the next day and after they’ve had some muffins they leave the house and see there is an owl sitting again on their hood. The owl is s stuffed owl and Goober has lowered it on a string from a tree. They decide that Helen is not the one after all.