Wanda Hendrix

            On Friday morning I dreamed I was kissing Imane Khelif. I think the dream was symbolic of something rather than sexual. 

            My cold was still there but more diminished than yesterday. 

            I searched for the audio for songs on my Boris Vian list so I could find the next of his songs to learn. I couldn’t find lyrics or music for “Ces suprenant”, “Cueillir le jour”, “Il y a plein de neige dans la rue”, or “Vamp”. I’ve got the lyrics for “Pour bercer ma peine” but there’s no audio posted. The next song with lyrics and audio is “Allons z'enfants” (Join the Ranks Kids), a comical song about being in the army when one is not army material. Tomorrow I’ll start memorizing it. 

            I finished working out the chords for “Amours des feintes” (Feinting Romance) by Serge Gainsbourg. I ran through singing it in French and English. Tomorrow I’ll upload it to my Christian’s Translations blog. 

            I played my Martin acoustic guitar during song practice for the first of two sessions. 

            I weighed 86.85 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I sanded the right casing of the frame of my bathroom door. I had expected to get more of the frame sanded but there was one nail that was sticking out that I couldn’t hammer in. I spent several minutes prying it with a screwdriver, trying to pull it out with pliers and trying to claw it out with a hammer. Finally I pried it out enough to catch it with the hammer claw. The rest of the frame should be easier. 

            I weighed 87.1 kilos before lunch. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 86.8 kilos at 17:30, which is the lightest I’ve been in the evening since last Friday. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 19:15. 

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “The Next State of Grace” I had last inserted a recent clip of me singing, “While I line up and wait for the next state of grace”. I lined it up with the studio audio. Then I synchronized the old concert video of me singing, “I’m biding my time here as god’s welfare case”. Then it was out of synch for my repetition of “while I line up and wait for the next state of grace”. I once again harvested a clip from my street video and inserted it, but that take was a little fast. So I took a clip from another take and synchronized that. Now it’s time to introduce the clips of people lip syncing “line up and wait for the next state of grace”. I converted the video of Minh into AVI WMV. Tomorrow I’ll import it into Movie Maker. 

            I roasted four chicken legs in the oven and put some of the drippings into the gravy I made yesterday to thin it out. I had one of the legs with a potato and gravy while watching season 8, episodes 7 and 8 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Samantha, Darrin, Larry and Louise go to stay in the Duke of Winsett’s haunted castle. That night the ghost of Harry the eighth duke of Winsett is making so much noise howling and rattling his chains that Samantha gets up from bed and goes to confront him. Harry finds Samantha attractive and so he takes over Darrin’s body to pursue her. But she knows almost right away that he’s not Darrin and avoids him. Meanwhile Louise thinks there’s something wrong with Samantha’s marriage. Then Harry as Darrin makes a pass at Louise too. Samantha decides to conjure a female ghost for Harry to play with from a portrait of the Duchess of Windermere. Samantha figured they had been lovers since it was her husband who made a ghost out of Harry. They are very happy to see each other again and now they haunt the castle together in a much less mournful manner. 

            In the second story Tabitha and Adam are watching a children’s TV show that is sponsored by one of Darrin’s clients, Lester Silverton. One of the features is a Punch and Judy puppet show. Punch and Judy was the very first show I saw when our TV was hooked up when I was four. Punch is always hitting Judy with a big stick and it inspires Adam to hit Tabitha. Tabitha doesn’t like Punch hitting Judy all the time and so she transports herself onto the set to stop him. The puppeteers improvise and interact with Tabitha through their puppets. She makes Punch’s stick disappear but Judy gives him another one and he hits her with that too. Darrin is watching from work and angrily calls Samantha who confronts Tabitha through the TV and tells her to come home. It turns out though that Tabitha was a hit with Silverton and with the public and they want to make her part of the show. Helen Silverton, the wife of Lester thinks he should put his daughter Robin in the show because she is a talented actor but he doesn’t want to use relatives. Samantha manipulates Helen to bring Robin to the studio. Tabitha doesn’t like all the work she has to do on the show and so Samantha tells her she doesn’t have to. She advises her to forget some of her lines. Then Samantha makes Silverton suggest to Robin that she play Tabitha’s part. After that Samantha takes Tabitha to have fun at the zoo. 

            Helen Silverton was played by Wanda Hendrix, who was discovered in her hometown theatre in Jacksonville Florida. Her family moved to California and she began to get featured roles in films at the age of 17. Her debut was in Confidential Agent. She did Ride a Pink Horse when she was 19. She co-starred in Miss Tatlock’s Millions, My Own True Love, Captain Carey USA, The Highwayman, Highway Dragnet, My Outlaw Brother, and Prince of Foxes. She married Audie Murphy at 21 but the marriage only lasted seven months because he was violent and perhaps psychotic. She retired in 1954 to marry millionaire James Stack, who was actor Robert Stack’s brother. They divorced in 1958 and she returned to acting. She starred in One Minute Before Death.

August 31, 1994: We performed Yuri's play at The Green Room

Thirty years ago today

            Mary Milne, Anna Montedioro, John Margerm, Yuri Kuchinski and myself staged Yuri’s play at the Green Room. I performed a song I wrote for it using Yuri’s lyrics. 

            Later I went to perform at the Black Rooster open stage.

Penny Santon

            

            On Thursday morning my cold felt a little less strong than the day before and so maybe it’s on the way down. 

            I finished posting “Wha’d Ya Do Wha’d Ya Do Billie Boo?”, my translation of “D’où reviens-tu Billy Boy?” by Boris Vian on my Boris Vian Facebook page and on my personal Facebook page. 

            I worked out the chords for all the verses of “Amours des feintes” (Feinting Romance) by Serge Gainsbourg. There’s only one chorus left, so I’ll probably have this song uploaded to my Christian’s Translations blog tomorrow. 

            I weighed 86.95 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I sanded the edges of the casing of my bathroom door frame and the head casing. I might be able to finish sanding the frame tomorrow. 

            I weighed 87.45 kilos before lunch. 

            Richard Olafson has made the last correction I requested for the text of my book. Then he shocked me by saying he’s thinking of having the launch on October 27. Holy crap that’s soon! It doesn’t give me a lot of time to prepare my performance or to promote the event. I would need to change my daily song practice to a whole new set of songs. I had planned to record audio and video of my regular set from September 1 to October 15 but if I change my set until the end of October then I will be two months out of practice for the set I planned to record and so I might have to wait until June to be back in practice. We’ll see. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and on the way back I stopped at Freshco. Their green grapes were on sale for $3.17 a kilo and that seems to be the best deal in town. I only found five bags in which the grapes weren’t too soft. I also got a pack of raspberries, bananas, two packs of five-year-old cheddar, a pork tenderloin, a pack of sliced turkey, a pack of corned beef, two packs of Full City Dark coffee, and a pack of whole wheat flour. 

            I weighed 87.1 kilos at 18:30. I was caught up on my journal at 19:30. 

            I made gravy from beef drippings but it turned out a little thick and so I’ll have to add some more liquid after I roast chicken legs on Friday. 

            I had a potato with gravy and my last slice of roast beef while watching season 8, episodes 5 and 6 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Samantha and Darrin are renting a villa in Pisa but they visit Rome for a museum tour where they see the statues of Venus and Adonis. As Samantha stops to admire the antique dolls in a cabinet one of the dolls turns out to be her mother. Darrin has to leave for a business lunch but as he walks away his head is turned by a gorgeous woman. Endora notices this and says she’s here to protect her daughter from Darrin’s wandering eye. So she brings the Venus statue to life and directs her to introduce herself to Darrin. She appears at his café table where he is waiting for his meeting and says her name is Vanessa. He is hypnotically enchanted by her beauty and when she suggests taking him on a tour of Rome he decides his business meeting is not important. He brings Vanessa home to Pisa and introduces her to Samantha as their new maid. Samantha tells her to put on an apron and she returns with nothing on but the apron. Samantha tells her to walk out of the room backwards and she’ll find her a uniform to put under the apron. Samantha knows there is something strange about Vanessa and she suspects that her mother is behind it. That night Samantha and Darrin are having a dinner party with Darrin’s boss Larry and Mr. and Mrs. Valdoni. It’s Mr. Valdoni who Darrin stood up earlier. As soon as the men see Vanessa they are charmed to distraction, much to Mrs. Valdoni’s chagrin. Valdoni gets a call from the director of the national museum because he is on the board of trustees and he is informed that Caravaggio’s Venus statue is missing. Suddenly Samantha realizes that Vanessa is Venus come to life. Samantha transports herself back to the museum in Rome where she brings the Adonis statue to life and brings him back. As soon as Venus and Adonis see each other there is recognition and they come into each other’s arms. Mrs. Valdoni is as affected by Adonis as her husband is by Venus. Samantha takes the two deities out in the garden and calls again for her mother. Endora sends them back to the museum as statues holding hands, which is not how they were originally. Samantha asks what are people going to say when they see them that way? Endora says, “What’s one more miracle in Rome?”

            Isabella Baldoni was played by Penny Santon, whose film debut was in Interrupted Melody. She played Laverne’s mother on Laverne and Shirley, Captain Furillo’s mother on Hill Street Blues and Mama Rosa Novelli on Matt Houston. She was in the original production of Tennessee Williams’s The Rose Tattoo. 

            In the second story Samantha and Darrin are now visiting Paris while Endora is babysitting Tabitha and Adam. But Samantha’s father Maurice comes to visit Samantha in the States only to learn that she is in Europe. He is now angry that his daughter has been in Europe for weeks and has yet to visit him and he blames Darrin. Endora turns a plant into a copy of Darrin for Maurice to focus his anger. The copy is extremely agreeable and complimentary of Maurice, which is really the opposite of the real Darrin. He presents Maurice with a portrait of him by Picasso. Maurice enjoys the flattery but even he finds it to be a bit too much. Maurice decides to help Darrin develop a backbone. But then the real Darrin walks in and so Endora has to get rid of the copy. Maurice realizes from his difference of manner towards him that something is amiss. Darrin says he and Samantha want to see Paris alone, so Maurice transports him to the top of the Eiffel Tower. Samantha goes to bring him back. Darrin stands up to Maurice and Maurice says he admires that but at the same time his anger causes objects around him to shatter. When Maurice isn’t looking Endora turns Darrin into a bust of Napoleon in the corner to hide him but Maurice sees through it and smashes the bust. Samantha demands that her father put Darrin back together but she says he doesn’t have the power. Endora says she’ll have to move back in with him to help him regain his strength and that motivates Maurice to make the effort to fix Darrin. Later Maurice invites everyone out for dinner at Maxim’s. Then Darrin’s client Monsieur Sagon comes and shows Darrin his picture at the top of the Eiffel Tower. Sagon says he can’t trust his Europa Tours account to an executive who would pull a stunt like that. But Maurice comes to Darrin’s rescue and says that this was a clever way of demonstrating the new slogan Darrin has for Sagon’s company, “Europa Tours Towers Above Them All”. Sagon loves it.

August 30, 1994: I went looking for my daughter and her mother at the CNE

Thirty years ago today

            I was supposed to get a call from Nancy about meeting her and my daughter at the Canadian National Exhibition. But she didn’t phone so I went there looking for her with no success. That night I hosted my Orgasmic Alphabet Orgy writers open stage in the Art Bar of the Gladstone Hotel. It was Adina’s first night there and she must have come with her friend Matthew.

Don Knight

            On Wednesday morning my cold wasn’t any worse than the day before so maybe that’s a sign it’s tapering. 

            I worked out the chords for the chorus of “Amours des feintes” (Feinting Romance) by Serge Gainsbourg. I think the rest of the song just repeats the pattern of the first two verses and the chorus, but we’ll see. 

            I played my Gibson Les Paul Studio during song practice for the first of two sessions. Since my Kramer is in the shop I’ll have more time to become familiar with the Gibson. 

            I weighed 87 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I sanded the lower left corner of the southern wall in my bathroom and that completes all of the walls. All that’s left to sand are the bathroom door frame and the door. 

            I weighed 87.6 kilos before lunch. I had Triscuits with five-year-old cheddar and a glass of raspberry iced tea. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 86.9 kilos at 17:45. 

            I spent about an hour going through Richard Olafson’s layout of my book with a fine toothed comb and found four more errors. I think once those are corrected we’ll be done. 

            I made pizza on a slice of multigrain sandwich bread with Basilica sauce and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching season 8, episodes 3 and 4 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Samantha and Darrin are still on vacation and are visiting Loch Ness in Scotland. Their host is Darrin’s cousin Robbie who owns a hotel there. He says business has been bad lately because the monster hasn’t made any appearances. The three are having a picnic on the beach when the monster pokes its head and long neck out of the water. Both Robbie and Darrin faint but Samantha addresses it as Bruce and tells it to get back in the water. She understands its roars and answers, “I don’t know where Serena is”. The next day the Baron Von Fuchs arrives with a mini-submarine officially to take photos of the monster. But the baron tells Samantha he plans to capture the monster dead or alive to earn the $3 million award from Boyd’s of London. This upsets Samantha because she knows that the monster is really a warlock named Bruce who is an old boyfriend of Serena. Serena thought he was behaving like a monster and so she turned him into one. Samantha summons Serena and they row out onto the lake so Serena can go below and find Bruce. She enters a hatch at the bottom of the lake and descends a ladder into Bruce’s bachelor pad. She changes him back to a warlock but then he tricks her and changes her into a mermaid in revenge for the 40 years he spent as a monster. Samantha and Darrin take Serena back to their hotel where Samantha summons Bruce. He says he’s not going to change Serena back but then they hear from Robbie that international TV crews are coming to film the monster. Samantha says Serena as a mermaid will be just as good and she’ll be a star. Serena says she might even take over Bruce’s pad. Bruce says he’d rather be a star in the lake than a loser as a warlock and so he changes her back so she can change him back to a monster. Later when the baron tries to capture him he eats the submarine and almost eats the baron. 

            Robbie was played by Don Knight, who was born in Britain and later studied to be a minister in Montreal. He was ordained in the United Church and even during his acting career he sometimes served as a pastor. In 1965 he moved to Hollywood and began acting. His first film was Munster Go Home. He co-starred in the TV series The Immortal. 

            In the second story Samantha and Darrin are now in Pisa, Italy. Esmerelda has been babysitting Tabitha and Adam but she is upset because one disaster has followed another after another. Tabitha was rude to her friend Dinah and Esmerelda told her she was making Dinah sore so suddenly there was a dinosaur in the house. The dinosaur set fire to the curtains and Esmerelda broke the vase throwing water at the fire. In trying to call Samantha she ends up transporting herself to Pisa, which is where she made one of her biggest blunders. Esmerelda is the one who caused the tower to lean while she was dating the architect who’d just finished building it. Then Esmerelda meets Darrin’s client Count Bracini who finds her very attractive and invites her on a tour of Pisa. Afterwards she regains her confidence and decides to correct her biggest goof. She straightens the leaning tower, which of course is a disaster for tourism. Esmerelda doesn’t remember how she made the tower lean in the first place and so Samantha takes her back in time to Bonano Pisano’s studio. Bonano expects her to bring him his lunch. A tower special with roast beef, Swiss cheese and turkey and he says to make the meat lean. So she casts a spell saying “One tower and make it lean” and suddenly the tower starts leaning. So now that they know what she did in the past she can do it in the present and correct her mistake. 

            Bonano was played by Robert Casper, who studied at the Goodman Theatre School and then worked on and off Broadway. He played Gerry Girard on Room 222.

August 29, 1994: We rehearsed Yuri's Play

Thirty years ago today

            On Monday Mary Milne, Anna Montedioro, John Margerm, Yuri Kuchinski and I rehearsed Yuri’s play.

Arlene Martel

            On Tuesday morning my cold was in full force. I have a date to get together with Brian Haddon for lunch on Wednesday but I think I’m going to have to postpone it for a week. 

            I published on my Christian’s translations blog “Wha’d Ya Do Wha’d Ya Do Billie Boo?”, my translation of “D’où reviens-tu Billy Boy?” by Boris Vian. 

            I worked out the chords for the first two verses of “Amours des feintes” (Feinting Romance) by Serge Gainsbourg. Next I’ll figure out the chorus and then I think I will have the pattern of the rest of the song.

            I weighed 87.2 kilos before breakfast, which is the heaviest I’ve been in the morning since last Tuesday. 

            I put away most of my laundry. 

            I emailed Brian and postponed tomorrow’s lunch date until next Wednesday. 

            I weighed 87.75 kilos before lunch. That’s the most my weight has been at midday since August 19. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride and stopped at Freshco on the way back. I bought five bags of green grapes, some bananas, and some toothpaste. I forgot to buy flour again to make gravy with. 

            I weighed 87.2 kilos at 18:00. 

            I got an email from Richard Olafson and found that he forgot to send me the publishing contract and had thought that he’d already sent it. I pointed out some typographical errors in the text of my book. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 19:30.

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “The Next State of Grace” I needed a clip of my line “I’ll freeze here on Earth with a heart that can’t burn”. I harvested one from the video of me singing the song on the street a couple of months ago. When I inserted it into the main video it was perfectly synchronized with the studio audio. Then I synchronized the old concert video with the studio audio for the line “So I’m biding my time here as god’s welfare case”. After that I had to harvest another clip from the street video for the line, “while I line up and wait for the next state of grace”. But when I pasted it into the main video it was slightly ahead of the studio audio so I had to take a bit more of the street video from a second beforehand and insert it to push the video back. Then the studio audio was slightly ahead so I had to start cutting bits off the street video. They were almost synchronized when I quit for the night. 

            I had a potato with margarine and a big slice of roast beef while watching the first two episodes of the eighth and final season of Bewitched. The two episodes are part of one story. 

            In part one Samantha and Darrin are on vacation in England and while touring the Tower of London Samantha is called to by a warlock named Herbert in a painting. He says he’s been trapped in the painting for 400 years and she is the first witch who has taken the tour. He was cursed by a witch named Malvina for asking another witch to marry him. She resented it because he was already married to Malvina. Samantha decides he’s been punished long enough and releases him. But then Malvina appears and tells her to return Herbert to the painting and so she does. That however is not enough for Malvina and she punishes Samantha for not minding her business by sending her back to the court of Henry VIII without her memory or her powers. As she arrives a cannon goes off to signal the death by beheading of Henry’s fifth wife Catherine Howard. Samantha hooks up with a troupe of minstrels entering the court. She is given a lute and sings for the king (Elizabeth Montgomery is actually chording the lute, so that’s impressive). Henry is smitten with Samantha and asks her name. She says, “I know not”. He says, “That’s a strange name. It sounds Irish”. He begins to pursue Samantha. Meanwhile Darrin calls Endora to tell her that her daughter has disappeared. She sends him back in time and he appears on the road just as a knight is passing. He asks him how far it is to the court of Henry VIII and the knight tells him it’s a long way since this is the court of Henry I. Darrin summons Endora again and this time she sends him back to the right time. His task is to get Samantha to kiss him even though she won’t recognize him. 

            In the second story Darrin sneaks into the palace and finds Samantha but his efforts to get her to kiss him get him thrown in the dungeon. He summons Endora, who only has the power to arrive and leave during time travel. However she uses the power of hypnosis to subdue the guard and releases Darrin. They go to Samantha who Endora approaches and tells that she’s a close friend of her mother. She encourages her to give Darrin a kiss but then Henry VIII has him seized again and this time says he’ll be beheaded. Endora suggests to Henry that he have a wrestling match with Darrin since he’s going to be executed anyway. Henry easily defeats Darrin and as Darrin is lying on the floor Samantha goes to him. He asks for a kiss and she gives it, which brings her memory back and then Endora transports them to the present in front of the portrait of Sir Herbert Wellingford in the Tower of London. Sir Herbert calls to Endora from the painting so she releases him and takes him away with her. 

            Malvina was played by Arlene Martel, who was extremely poor as a child in the Bronx but her mother’s boss paid for her to attend an upper class private school. At 12 she auditioned for the High School of the Performing Arts in New York and later graduated with the top drama award. She made her Broadway debut in her teens as Esther in Uncle Willie. She moved to Hollywood and began making guest appearances on popular TV series. She played Spock’s fiancé T’Pring in the Star Trek episode Amok Time. She had a recurring role as the French Underground agent Tiger on Hogan’s Heroes. She was nicknamed The Chameleon because of her ability with accents and dialects. She guest starred in “Demon With a Glass Hand”, which is considered to be the best episode of The Outer Limits TV series. She starred in the movie The Glass Cage. She co-starred in the films Angels from Hell and Dracula’s Dog.

August 28, 1994: I had my daughter with me until evening

Thirty years ago today

            On Sunday I probably had my daughter with me until the evening.

Marcia Wallace

            On Monday morning I had what felt like cold symptoms but I was hoping it was only a reaction to pollen. 

            I worked out the chords for the intro and most of the first verse of “Amours des feintes” (Feinting Romance) by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            I played my Martin acoustic guitar during song practice for the third of four sessions. 

            I weighed 87.05 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I stuffed my laundry into my bike trailer and rode to the Speedy Queen laundry. My trailer malfunctioned while crossing Lansdowne because I didn’t put the clamp on tight enough and it started grinding against the wheel. I made it across and then adjusted it. Speedy is only about a block and a third west of the Himalayan Laundry. It cost me $9 to wash and dry. The Tibetan place is cheaper but I’m mad at them for refusing to reimburse me for my soap when one machine broke down and then when the power went off in the middle of washing them in the second machine last month. 

            I weighed 87.4 kilos at 14:45. 

            After I woke up from a siesta it was too late to take a bike ride downtown. 

            At 17:15 I weighed 87.95, 87.05, and then 87.75 twice, so I guess I’ll go with the latter. That’s the heaviest I’ve been in the evening since August 18. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 18:20. 

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “The Next State of Grace” I’d left off with the line “that’s built from the sweat”. Last time I’d inserted a clip of that line from the recent video of me singing the song on the street. This time I synchronized that with the studio audio. Then I synchronized the old concert video with the studio audio for the line “of my tarpaper third world heart” (Nowadays my line is “of my tarpaper shack dwelling heart” but I can’t change that for this video). Then I cut out a little bit of the concert video to line it up with the studio audio for the beginning of the chorus “Oh when oh when will I ever learn”. But then they fall apart for “I’ll freeze here on Earth with a heart that can’t burn”, so I’ll have to harvest another clip from my street video. I’ll work on that next time. 

            I had planned to make gravy tonight but on Saturday I forgot to buy flour. So for dinner I had a potato with margarine and slice of roast beef. I ate while watching the last two episodes of the seventh season of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Endora says Darrin has no sense of humour and so she casts a spell to make him tell jokes all the time. He starts by telling wife jokes to his secretary. A wife is called the better half because when they ask for money you’d better have it. After a couple more he realizes he’s under a spell and wants to go home but his boss Larry insists that he meet with their client Mr. Jameson. Jameson is a very serious man in the serious business of insurance. Darrin starts off telling jokes about drinking: He knows a guy who comes to work so loaded they make him use the freight elevator. When there’s a nip in the air he tries to drink it. The meeting is a disaster and Darrin comes home mad. Samantha gets her mother to remove the spell. But Darrin never learns to shut up and threatens to call an exterminator to get rid of Endora. So she casts another spell to cause him to laugh at anything serious. He’s about to head back to work when Gladys Kravitz tells him her sister is going for an operation. When he hears himself laughing at this he realizes he’s under another spell and goes back in the house. Samantha tells Larry Darrin can’t come to work because he’s sick. Larry wants Jameson to see Darrin’s layouts before he leaves town. On the way to the airport he brings Mr. and Mrs. Jameson by Darrin’s house. The first thing Darrin laughs at is Mrs. Jameson’s migraine. But Samantha covers for him by laughing as well and says they are laughing at something she said earlier about their nosey neighbour: She has a keen sense of rumour. This causes Mrs. Jameson to laugh. Samantha says Darrin’s laughter is staged to drive home a point. Then Darrin opens up the portfolio containing the layouts for Jameson’s campaign and tears them up. He says because insurance is such a serious business the approach to advertizing it should be funny as a form of release. Samantha says the slogan is, “Put a little laughter in your disaster”. Mrs. Jameson thinks it’s hilarious. Then Darrin says, “Keep your mother in law at home where most accidents happen”. Mrs. Jameson loves that one too. Larry says he knew a boss once who before he would fire you he’d give you a raise so you’d be losing a better job. Even Mr. Jameson is laughing now and his bursitis is gone. 

            Darrin’s secretary Betty was played by multiple actors throughout the series. This time she was played by Marcia Wallace who majored in English and Theatre in college. In 1968 she was one of the founding members of the improv group The Fourth Wall and studied acting with Uta Hagen. Her first TV appearances were as a regular on the Merv Griffin Show and that led to her being cast as the Carol Kester, the receptionist on the first Bob Newhart Show. She had a substantial career doing commercials for various products. She was a panelist for several game shows such as Match Game, Password, The $10,000 Pyramid, and Hollywood Squares. She was best known as the voice of Bart’s teacher Edna Krabappel on The Simpsons, for which she won an Emmy Award. Her memoir was entitled Don’t Look Back, We’re Not Going That Way. 

            The second story steals some of its plot from an earlier episode. Darrin’s mother Phyllis brings Tabitha an antique doll that she got from her grandmother. Samantha makes her let her brother Adam play with it but Tabitha levitates it back to her arms right in front of Phyllis. In order to explain this to Phyllis, Samantha convinces her that she has latent powers. Phyllis tries to levitate the doll consciously and Samantha causes it to come to her. Samantha tells her supernatural powers come and go but mostly go and so it will probably never happen again. Phyllis refuses to accept that and says people said her grandmother had powers. Phyllis goes to the library and borrows a lot of books on supernatural phenomena. She tries to demonstrate her powers to her husband Frank but nothing happens. Phyllis goes back to Darrin and Samantha’s house and says that her powers only work there because she has a familiar there. Now she has to figure out what object serves as her familiar. Then Tabitha once again levitates the doll and Phyllis says the doll is her familiar. She tells Tabitha she’ll get her a new doll but needs to take this one. Samantha decides she needs to scare Phyllis out of this obsession so when she calls Frank a stubborn mule she turns him into a mule and makes Phyllis think that she did it. But it doesn’t have the desired effect and Phyllis only concludes that she’ll have to be careful with her power from now on. Samantha suggests she have a séance to contact her grandmother and get some advice on how to use her powers to turn Frank back. During the séance Samantha conjures a human shaped light and has it speak to Phyllis in an Irish accent. Grandma says it’s a family curse and tells Phyllis she must promise never to use her powers again. Phyllis promises. Her “grandmother” tells her the magic words for turning Frank back are “I love you”. In this episode they were back to the original actor who played Frank.

August 27, 1994: I took my daughter to the Canadian National Exhibition

Thirty years ago today

            On Saturday I took my daughter to the Canadian National Exhibition.

Tom Bosely

            On Sunday morning I searched for the chords for “Amours des feintes” (Feinting Romance) by Serge Gainsbourg and found a set on La bôite à chansons (Song Box). I transcribed them and looked for more but no more were posted. Tomorrow I’ll start working them out. 

            I played my Martin acoustic guitar during song practice for the second of four sessions. 

            I weighed 86.85 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I sanded the rest of the northern wall in my bathroom. All that’s left to sand is the lower left corner of the southern wall and the door and the frame. 

            I weighed 87.5 kilos before lunch. I had Triscuits with five-year-old cheddar and a glass of raspberry iced tea. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 87 kilos at 17:30. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 18:55. 

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “The Next State of Grace” I needed a clip of my line “like a scavenger looking for parts”. I selected a clip from the video I shot of myself singing on the street two months ago and pasted it into the main timeline, then synchronized it. Then I synchronized the old concert video with the studio audio for the line “and it lives in a mansion”. After that I took another clip from the recent video of me singing “that’s built from the sweat”. I inserted that into the main video and I’ll edit it tomorrow. 

            I made pizza on a slice of multigrain bread with Basilica sauce and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching season 7, episodes 25 and 26 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Darrin catches Samantha using witchcraft just as he is about to give her a beautiful bracelet as a reward for not having used magic in a while. He insists that she take it anyway but she feels guilty. After she puts it on she gets the hiccups and every time she does it a different cycle vehicle appears starting with a bicycle. Other than what pops up from the hiccups her powers are not working. Then Darrin’s mother Phyllis visits and wonders about all the bikes. Samantha says they are on an exercise kick. Phyllis asks what kind of exercise one can get from a motorcycle. Samantha says if one joins a bike gang it can be quite strenuous. Samantha summons Dr. Bombay. He is dressed something like Liberace and his diagnostic computer is like a small piano on top of which he places a candelabra. The readout shows that her promising not to do witchcraft is unnatural and creates an inner conflict. When she broke her promise her guilt feeling precipitated a crisis causing her subconscious to produce bikes. He gives her a pranquilizer treatment with his giant tuning fork and says, “Now her strength shall be rebuilt and eliminate all guilt”. All the bikes disappear and then Samantha leaves to go shopping with Phyllis. But on the way out the door she hiccups and the gilded mirror in the foyer disappears. Serena arrives to babysit and Darrin gets her to call for Bombay again. Bombay determines that his word choice was wrong when he reversed the spell because he said “remove all gilt” so now gilded things within range will disappear. Since they don’t know where Samantha went Bombay conjures an omnidirectional three dimensional vectoring cadmium shielded computer for location analysis. Meanwhile Samantha and Phyllis are in a department store and visit the jewellery department. Samantha passes a golden emerald necklace and hiccups, causing it to disappear. The store detective confronts them because he saw that the necklace was gone after they passed it. He takes them to a locked office and interrogates them. Then he takes Phyllis into another room, leaving Samantha alone. Just then Darrin and Bombay appear. Bombay says he can fix the problem but she must stop feeling guilty about using witchcraft. He cures her with the tuning fork and another spell. The necklace returns to it’s display. As Serena is about to leave Darrin says his favourite thing about her is when she says goodbye so she turns him into a baby goat and disappears. 

            In the second story Esmerelda is depressed about her love life. Her old boyfriend Ferdy wants to see her again. She’s worried because it’s been over 400 years since she dated him and she’s aged. Samantha gives Esmerelda a makeover and puts a spell on the mirrors to make her see a younger and prettier version of herself. It definitely boosts her confidence and she becomes very flirtatious. Ferdy comes and meets her at Samantha’s house. Esmerelda offers him a drink and he asks for scotch on the rocks. Esmerelda conjures a Scotsman playing bagpipes on some rocks. While she is out of the room we see that Ferdy has been getting help with his magic from his nephew who is watching through the window. It turns out that Ferdy’s powers are as undependable as Esmerelda’s so they bond over their mutual malfunctioning and become engaged. 

            Ferdy was played by Tom Bosely, who trained at the Radio Institute of Chicago and his first parts were in that medium. He made his television debut in a 1955 production of Alice in Wonderland. He won a Tony Award in 1960 for his starring role in Fiorello. He originated the part of Maurice in Beauty and Beast on Broadway. He co-starred in all 255 episodes of Happy Days. He starred in the TV series Father Dowling investigates and the animated series Wait Till Your Father Gets Home. He played Sheriff Amos Tupper on Murder She Wrote. He co-starred in the movies The World of Henry Orient, Mixed Company, and Bang Bang Kid. It felt like I was either coming down with a cold or having a strong reaction to pollen.

August 26, 1994: I spent the day writing

Thirty years ago today

            On Friday I spent the day writing.

Eric Scott

            On Saturday morning I finished memorizing “Amours des feintes” (Feinting Romance) by Serge Gainsbourg. Tomorrow I’ll look for the chords. 

            During song practice I played my Martin acoustic guitar for the first of four sessions. 

            I weighed 87.05 kilos before breakfast. 

            Around midday I took my bike trailer to No Frills. The grapes were all too soft and so I got a watermelon and two baskets of nectarines instead. I also bought three packs of raspberries, a bag of potatoes, two T-bone steaks, mouthwash, chili sauce, peppercorns, a box of spoon size shredded wheat, cinnamon-raisin bread, multigrain sandwich bread, skim milk, a jug of raspberry iced tea, a jug of orange juice, two containers of skyr, and two bags of Miss Vickie’s potato chips. 

            I weighed 87.7 kilos before lunch. I had Triscuits with five-year-old cheddar and a glass of raspberry iced tea. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 86.85 kilos at 17:45. 

            I was caught up on my journal at 18:51. 

            In the Movie Maker project to create a video for the studio recording of my song “The Next State of Grace” I deleted some of the concert video of the instrumental. There’s a point near the end when I’m doing a non-verbal vocal and I transition from singing “Ahhh” to singing “Ohhh” but in the concert video I take longer to get to the “Ohhh” part and so I cut out some of the space in between. I got it synchronized with the studio audio but then I finish that vocal part slightly sooner in the concert video. So I took a clip from the video I shot of myself singing the song on the street a couple of months ago. In the studio audio I finish while singing “ahhh” again but on the street it turns out that I sang “ohhh” in that part. But when I inserted it into the main video it wasn’t very noticeable that my mouth was forming “oh” instead of “ah”. I synchronized the concert video with the studio audio for the beginning of the last verse when I sing, “And my mind hangs above this emotional wreck”. But then they fall apart for “like a scavenger looking for parts”. Tomorrow I’ll decide what to do about that. 

            I made pizza on a slice of multigrain sandwich bread with Basilica sauce and five-year-old cheddar. I had it with a beer while watching season 7, episodes 23 and 24 of Bewitched. 

            In the first story Tabitha and Adam are playing in a small above ground swimming pool. Tabitha asks her mother when they will be getting a real pool. Samantha answers when they can afford it. Endora appears and expresses frustration that her grandchildren have to settle for a life of squalor. Darrin and Larry share a cab to work and as Darrin is leaving, the cabbie asks if he forgot something. There’s a large envelope in the back seat, which Darrin assumes is something Larry forgot. Darrin takes it to his office and calls Larry’s office to ask about it. Larry says to open it and tell him what it is. Darrin opens it and it contains $100,000, which Darrin thinks was conjured by Endora. He tells Larry it’s a note from his mother in law. Darrin calls Samantha to complain about Endora but Samantha finds out that her mother had nothing to do with it. Darrin brings the cash home and when Darrin asks if Samantha did it she is insulted and after making the money disappear goes out to cool off. An hour or so before that Mr. Kosko the real owner of the envelope tracks down the cab through the dispatcher and the cabbie tells him who took the envelope. They wait outside Darrin’s office building until he leaves and then follow him home. Kosko asks for his money but Darrin doesn’t know where it is because his wife has it. Kosko pulls a gun and tells him to find her. He calls Louise who says Samantha is there but doesn’t want to talk with him. When Louise tells Samantha he was babbling about someone coming for the money and life or death, Samantha goes home. Samantha meets Kosko and wants to know where and how he got the money and why it wasn’t in a bank. Kosko is evasive. Then a large man named Braun arrives who is associated with Kosko. Samantha says she’s having a hard time remembering where she put the money. Kosko and Braun draw their guns but Samantha makes Braun’s gun fall apart and turns Kosko’s gun into a toy that shoots a “Bang” sign. Then Samantha causes sirens to be heard outside and a megaphone voice to call for Kosko and Braun. They decide to surrender and leave with their hands up but there is no one outside. Then real sirens arrive responding to the sirens they heard. Samantha gives the cops the money and Kosko and Braun are taken in for questioning.

            In the second story, Endora wants to take Tabitha to the unicorn races but Darrin won’t allow it. Endora thinks he’s being childish and so she turns him into a ten year old boy and refuses to change him back until he apologizes, which he refuses to do. Larry comes by and Samantha introduces the young Darrin as Darrin’s nephew Marvin. Marvin goes to play in the park with Tabitha and when they come back Tabitha tells her mother that her father played basketball with the other boys. We learn for the first time that Darrin played college basketball for Missouri State University. He has many years of experience despite the current age of his body. Then Herbie, one of the kids that Marvin played basketball with shows up at the kitchen door. He hints that he’d like to stay for lunch. Samantha doesn’t have time to prepare anything from scratch and so she opens a can of Mother Flanagan’s Irish stew. Herbie takes two bites and then decides to go home for lunch. Then both Samantha and Darrin try it and hate it too. Now Darrin has to convince Larry to drop the account. Samantha is sure he will after tasting the stew. Larry does hate it but still wants to sell the product. Darrin suggests they sell it while telling the truth such as “It may not be a gourmet treat but at least it’s nourishing” and “it’s cheap”. Then Flanagan himself comes by. Samantha suggests to Darrin that she turn him back into Marvin and let him tell Flanagan the truth. Marvin meets Flanagan and he asks him if he likes his stew. He says he doesn’t. He says he eats everything he’s served but he couldn’t eat Flanagan’s stew. Flanagan says he remembers that he never liked his mother’s stew either. Samantha suggests he lower the price and sell it as Mother Flanagan’s Doggie Stew. Flanagan loves the idea. Later Herbie comes to ask if Marvin can play basketball. He says they’re playing a bunch of bullies and couldn’t win without him. Samantha thinks Herbie’s honesty about Flanagan’s stew should be rewarded and convinces Darrin to let her turn him into Marvin one more time. 

            Herbie was played by Eric Scott, who played Ben Walton on The Waltons and appeared in all 212 episodes. After The Waltons he started a business called Chase Messengers, which was a parcel delivery service in Encino, California.

August 25, 1994: I was with the committee planning the first annual Parkdale Artbeat Festival

Thirty years ago today

            On Thursday I ran into Tom Smarda and his brother on Queen Street. Tom snapped at me but all was well later. 

            In the evening I went to the Rhino in Parkdale and attended the meeting upstairs of the committee that was planning the first annual Parkdale Artbeat Festival. I recall being the only one who argued about the planned format.