Catherine Zeta Jones

            On Wednesday morning I memorized the first verse of “La complainte de Bonnot”. 

            I worked out the chords for the first verse and two lines of the chorus of the “Que je t’aime” (That I Love You) parody” by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            I weighed 89.45 kilos before breakfast, which is the lightest I’ve been in the evening since June 5. 

            I played my Kramer during song practice and it stayed in tune most of the time.

            I left at 13:30 to ride my Raleigh downtown to the U of T School of Dentistry to get a CT scan. I thought it was going to take at least half an hour like last time. But previously the radiology student scanned all my teeth while this time it was just the area where I’d gotten the bone graft so it was over a lot quicker. An attractive doctor came in to check the student’s work, told me, “It looks good!” and I was out of there five minutes after the appointment started. 

            I weighed 90.05 kilos at 15:15. I had peanut butter and five-year-old cheddar on saltines with a glass of lemonade.

            I took a siesta and slept for an extra half an hour. 

            I weighed 90.45 kilos at 18:35. 

            I had intended to make bread pizza for supper but I wanted to have french fries on it and by the time I remembered it was too late. So instead I heated some frozen boneless chicken wings and some oven fries. I had them with a glass of Creemore lager while watching season 1, episode 5 of Wednesday on Discord with my daughter Astrid. 

            Previously Wednesday had a vision that Eugene was in danger. He had gone into the woods without Wednesday and we saw him meet the monster. We don’t see exactly what happened but at the beginning of this episode we learn that Eugene is in a coma and Wednesday feels guilty. On top of that it’s Parents Weekend and she has to deal with her family visiting. The principal gets Morticia, Gomez, and Pugsley to attend one of Wednesday’s therapy sessions. Pugsley eats Dr. Kinbott’s potpourri. He says he misses being waterboarded by Wednesday. 

            The coroner has committed suicide and left a note. The sheriff finds to evidence to support his decades old suspicion that Gomez murdered Garrett Gates. We see two alternative flashbacks to the death of Gates. Garrett was obsessed with Morticia and tried to kill Gomez. He either accidentally thrust himself onto Gomez’s sword or a sword that Morticia was holding. The sheriff arrests Gomez. Wednesday digs up Garrett’s grave and discovers that he tried to kill everyone at Nevermore with deadly nightshade. He accidentally poisoned himself and was feeling the effects when he attacked Gomez. But Wednesday and Morticia get arrested for grave digging. Wednesday presents the evidence she discovered and Gomez is freed. 

            Wednesday confronts the principal because she has figured out that she is the shape shifter and that Rowan was killed by the monster the night he tried to kill Wednesday. 

            Morticia tells Wednesday that she will need help from the undead to help hone her powers. 

            We meet the parents of two of the main characters as well. 

            Enid’s mother is disappointed in Enid because she has not yet turned into a werewolf. 

            Bianca’s wants her to return home so they can use their Siren powers in criminal activities.

            Morticia is played by Catherine Zeta-Jones, who at the age of 10 co-starred in Annie in the West End. At 15 starred in the British revival of 42nd Street. She made her film debut in 1001 Nights in 1990. In 1991 she co-starred in the British sitcom The Darling Buds of May, which made her a star in Britain. She co-starred in Splitting Heirs, and Blue Juice. By the mid 90s she was becoming too much of a sex symbol in Britain and so she decided to start over by mobbing to Hollywood. She co-starred in The Phantom, The Mask of Zorro, Entrapment, The Terminal, Side Effects, Red 2, Dad’s Army, The Haunting, Traffic, America’s Sweethearts, Chicago (for which she won an Oscar), Sinbad, The Terminal, Ocean’s Twelve, Death Defying Acts, Intolerable Cruelty, Lay the Favourite, Rock of Ages, Playing for Keeps, The Legend of Zorro, The Gallerist, She starred in No Reservations, The Rebound, She starred in the TV series Queen America, National Treasure, She earned $20 million as a spokesperson for T-Mobile. She also became a spokesperson for Elizabeth Arden. She won a Tony Award in 2010 for her performance in A Little Night Music. She was appointed as a Commander of the Order of the British Empire by Queen Elizabeth in 2010. She married the 25 years older Michael Douglas in 2000. She has bipolar disorder. She says the key to a successful marriage is each spouse having their own bathroom.