Sixteen Tons of Dogma

            On Friday morning I memorized the first two verses and the chorus of "Scènes de manager" (Unsightly Public Scenes) by Serge Gainsbourg. 

            I weighed 85.3 kilos before breakfast. That's the lightest I've been in the morning in six days. 

            I finished washing the grooves for the sliding windows on the right side of my kitchen window set. I cleaned one of the outer sliding windows and before installing it I laid down on my back on a pillow with my head outside the window and reached up with the squeegee to give the big right window another wipe on the outside. Since I have to go to the supermarket tomorrow, I might not have time to clean the other sliding windows until Sunday. 

            I weighed 85 kilos before lunch. That's the least I've weighed at that time in two weeks. 

            In the afternoon I took a bike ride downtown and back. 

            I weighed 85.2 kilos at 17:00. 

            In the Movie Maker project for my song "Sixteen Tons of Dogma" I finished isolating the song and published it. Then I uploaded it to YouTube. I posted it on Twitter and Facebook, and I sent a link to Brian Haddon, who used to play the song with me. I also sent a link to Dutch Jongman, who mentioned a few years ago that he liked the song. Here is the link: 

 https://youtu.be/oq9y34xFms0 

            I spent a long time searching for vintage film footage of someone holding a brain. I thought there would at least be something like that in an old horror movie, but I couldn't find anything so far. 

            I grilled three pork chops in the oven and fried two in a pan with olive oil, garlic, salt, pepper, apple cider vinegar, and Chinese chili sauce. I had one with honey, plus a potato with gravy while watching a Bugs Bunny Mother's Day special from 1979 and a Bugs Bunny short from 1980. 

            The special was entitled, "Bugs Bunny Baby Boomers", and as with other specials, there is new footage created just to thread the old features together. Bugs encounters Granny, who is giving out flowers to welcome newborn babies. A stork steps forward to argue that his job is also very important, and so all of the old cartoons feature baby stories that result from the stork getting drunk and delivering the wrong kind of baby animal to expecting animal parents. 

            But the first story doesn't actually involve the stork. In this case, Daffy Duck is married, and his wife has already laid an egg. She tells Daffy that it's his turn to sit on the egg and he says that's for sissies. But she says to do it or else and so he says, "Yes dear!" He sits on the nest but finds it uncomfortable and so he takes the egg out to adjust the seat, but while he's doing that the egg rolls away and lands on a pile of alligator eggs. He can't tell which is his but figures an egg is an egg and grabs one. The mother gator is distraught and so the father goes to get it back. Daffy and the gator go back and forth, stealing back the egg until finally, Daffy wins. Then the egg hatches and Daffy and his wife have a baby alligator. Mrs. Duck insists that it is just an ugly duckling. The same scenario unfolds with the alligator parents as one of their hatchlings is a duckling. 

            The next story is a Foghorn Leghorn tale in which he becomes a parent. A mischievous barnyard dog has placed a giant ostrich egg next to Foghorn while he sleeps. When he wakes up, he believes that he laid it while he was sleeping. He sits on it, and it hatches into a baby ostrich, which he raises as his own. We see that the ostrich grows to be three times bigger than Foghorn, but he still thinks it's his son.

            Then we see the story of when Bugs Bunny got mixed up with a stork's bundle and was delivered to a mother kangaroo. 

            Then Daffy confronts the stork and says that he caused the break-up of his first marriage, and now that he's happy in his second partnership he wants the stork to leave them alone. Daphne Duck however is expecting a visit from the stork. Daffy begins to arm, and booby trap his house to make sure the stork is not able to deliver the egg. There are bear traps, guillotines, and alligators waiting for the stork, as well as electronic sensors. But the drunken stork makes it in anyway. There's a trap door just inside the front door and below the snapping alligators are waiting. But the stork avoids the trap and Daffy falls in. But Daffy is successful at catapulting the stork away and he later tells Bugs that he landed in a home for unmarried female ducks. The egg ended up with forty mothers. 

            Then we see the story of the stork losing a gorilla baby and kidnapping Bugs Bunny to deliver him instead. 

            In the end, an egg that has been delivered to Daffy turns out to be a stork baby and so Daffy flies and delivers it to the stork. I think it's the first time Daffy Duck has ever flown like a duck. 

            The second feature is called "A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Bunny", and it's a flashback to when Bugs Bunny was a child on the first day of summer vacation. Little Bugs says naughty is natural for little kids. Then we see a young version of Elmer Fudd, who is also just beginning his summer and celebrating by hunting rabbits with his toy cork shooting gun. He shoots Bugs in the behind and Bugs dramatically pretends to die. Then Elmer shoots at Bugs with a cork-firing cannon but Bugs rides the cork, which turns and chases Elmer off a cliff. Elmer doesn't fall because he has yet to study gravity in school and so Bugs leaves a book on gravity for him to read. While reading it and walking he absent-mindedly walks off a cliff and this time falls. Elmer confronts Bugs and calls him a vicious forest creature. But Bugs grabs the gun and says, "That's my line" Elmer says, "No that's my line" but he pronounces the "L" as he always does with a "W" sound because of his rhotacism. But for the first time in Bugs Bunny's history, he draws attention to Elmer's speech disorder and accuses Elmer of offering wine to a minor. Elmer tries to swear off hunting rabbits, but he can't and goes after Bugs with a cork machine gun. The adult Bugs says he thinks he and Elmer were the youngest people to start chasing each other but then he sees a little Wile E Coyote chasing a half-hatched Roadrunner egg with just the running legs and the head sticking out. 

            I did a search for bedbugs and following the pattern of finding one sick one every two days, I found one halfway up the left side of the frame of the old exit door at the head of my bed. 

            I felt sleepy at 22:00 and went to bed for an hour, then I got up, did the dishes, put the pork chops away, got ready for bed, and then finished writing my journal. I went to bed again at around 1:30 but didn't sleep very well.