Loveable Thieves

            On Saturday morning I worked out the chords for all the verses of “Belinda” by Serge Gainsbourg and so all I have left is the final repetitions of the chorus. I might have that done tomorrow if I don't work on my essay instead. 

            I weighed 88 kilos before breakfast. 

            In the late morning, I went out to No Frills. They had red grapes on sale but they were all soft and the apples all were bruised, so I bought three bags of clementines and two bags of navel oranges. I also got a pack of pork chops, another of chicken drumsticks, a jar of Florentine spinach and cheese pasta sauce, a jar of hot salsa, a bottle of Calabrian chili sauce, a jug of orange juice, and a box of spoon size shredded wheat. I wanted to get some oven mitts because mine have little holes that allow my skin to get burned when I grab hot pans. The only thing they had were $15 gloves with heat-proof grips on the fingers and palms but the rest was just cloth, so it didn't seem worth it. I think I'll just put my leather gloves on under the oven mitts I have until I can find some better ones. At the checkout I asked for the large recyclable PC bags because I've got little holes in mine but they didn't have any. 

            On my way into my building, I saw my upstairs neighbour David. I told him they came to spray his place last Friday but he hadn't left me his key so they couldn't get in. He said he'll leave it with me for next Friday. I advised him to get a new mattress and a bedbug-proof mattress cover. I haven't seen any bedbugs in my place for over two weeks and I think it's because I put duct tape over the electrical outlet near my bed. 

            I worked on my Shakespeare essay on Autolycus from The Winter's Tale and came up with a thesis: 

            In Shakespeare's The Winter's Tale Autolycus's has the ability to effortlessly cross political, cultural, emotional, seasonal, geographical, and generic borders. It is because of this that Autolycus not only presides over the comedy of the play but also causes the resolution of the tragic events of the first three acts. 

            The essay is due in a little over a day and a half and has the odd deadline of 9:00. Last year all of the deadlines were at 23:59. 

            I weighed 87.9 kilos before lunch. I had saltines with five year old cheddar and a glass of lemonade. I took a bike ride to Yonge and Bloor. On my way down Yonge I could see darkness caught in the tunnel of red lights ahead of me and it looked like it would be dark soon even though on the southern horizon the sky was a light pink-orange. So when I stopped at the Alexander stop light I turned my flashers on. But when I turned right on Richmond and headed west the sky was much brighter in the direction I was going. I didn't turn the flashers off but I didn't really need them. I weighed 87.6 kilos when I got home. 

            I worked on my essay for over two hours until dinnertime. This is what I have so far: 

            The frontiers are my prison – Hy Zaret 

            Autolycus’s Ability to Cross Boundaries Robs Shakespeare's The Winter's Tale of Tragedy 

           In Shakespeare's The Winter's Tale Autolycus's has the ability to effortlessly cross political, cultural, emotional, seasonal, geographical, and generic borders. It is because of this that Autolycus not only presides over the comedy of the play but also causes the resolution of the tragic events of the first three acts. 

           In The Winter's Tale, the problems arise because of the inability of the other characters to traverse boundaries. For Leontes the barrier between the real and the feared becomes tenuous, and he cannot discern the points of division between friendship and betrayal; between marriage and cuckoldry; nor between his children and those of others. Because he is a king his weakening grip on psychological perimeters results in a tightening fist of limits being imposed on those around him. These limits are thefts of freedom and the harmful removals of loved ones. He steals Hermione's liberty, status and baby from her; he robs his son Mamillius of his mother; Paulina's husband is stolen from her by his duty to Leontes. Devastating thefts are caused by these artificial boundaries imposed by Leontes and they result in death and the walls crumbling as Leontes bounds himself in a cocoon of remorse over what he has stolen from himself. In contrast to Leontes, Autolycus's thefts cause no harm because he understands boundaries. 

            I made pizza on naan with Florentine sauce and extra old cheddar and had it with a beer while watching an episode of Gomer Pyle. 

            This story was another rehashing of a tired old TV trope. In this case it is the trope of the news of the dying pet being misunderstood as the approach of the passing of a major character. The earliest I've seen of this trope was on The Honeymooners when Ralph reads a vet's diagnosis that a pet dog is dying but thinks it's a doctor's letter to Alice after Ralph's recent check-up. 

            In this story it is Bunny's cat that is ill and the doctor does not give him long to live. Gomer however misunderstands when Bunny tells him and thinks she is talking about Sergeant Carter. When Gomer asks if there is anything that can be done she says he has to be kept warm and under no circumstances should he get wet. Carter wakes up the next morning with two heaters blasting at his bed. Then when he tries to take a shower the water is off. He goes outside and turns it on but when he goes back to the shower the water goes off again. When he goes back to the pump he finds the valve has been removed. When Gomer calls Bunny again to ask what can be done she says he needs a cup of warm milk every day and a ball with a bell in it. Carter finds a cup of warm milk on his desk and a ball with a bell in his locker. Then Carter gets a call from Bunny telling him Boots is going to be fine after all. This was something Carter suspected all along because he thinks the cat hates him and pretends to be sick so he doesn't come round. When Bunny asks Carter to let Gomer know that Boots is all right he puts two and two together and realizes Gomer thought he was dying. Carter decides to teach Gomer a lesson and calls him to his death bed where he pretends to die. Gomer rushes to call the hospital while Carter laughs until his right side begins to hurt. The doctor arrives and tells Carter he has appendicitis and so it's lucky that Gomer called them.