Food Bank Adventures: Are Ontario's New Wheelchairs Dangerous for those on Disability?

            On Saturday morning I woke up vaguely remembering a dream that was a spy thriller in which I had disguised a guitar as a pair of underwear.

I finished memorizing “Ma lou Marilou” by Serge Gainsbourg. I looked for the chords online and was surprised that no one had posted them, since the song has a nice melody. I started working them out for myself.

My new guitar sounds great but there is a buzzing on the A string at the third fret. I noticed it since I bought it but at first I just thought it was my perception or my playing that was the problem. Since it’s under warranty I’ll take it back to Remenyi and get the problem fixed.

            At 9:30 I got ready to go to the food bank. It was sunny but chilly and so I wore jeans and a long sleeved shirt.

            On the way I saw a rough looking woman with short hair struggling across the street while pulling one of those little shopping carts with the tall anti theft poles that one sees in the Dollarama. Just before I passed, her cart flipped over as she tried to get it over the westbound streetcar track. I asked her if she needed help and she responded in an unfriendly tone, “No I don't need any help!" I was about to move on when she said, "Yes, I do need help.” I got off my bike to lend a hand, but then she asked, “Do you smoke crack for cigarettes?" I answered no and then she said, "Well then I don't need any help then, do I?"

When I got to the food bank I saw so many people standing off the sidewalk and in the bike lane that I thought there was a new arrangement for the line-up. But those people were just standing in the sun to soak up the warmth because the sidewalk was cold in the shade.

            My spot was on the green heart that's second to last, near Beaty Avenue. I put my backpack down on my place in line and went to the edge of the sidewalk to read my book of French stories in the sun. I got through a couple more pages of “The Return of the Prodigal Son” by André Gide. The story basically begins where Jesus Christ’s parable of the prodigal son ends. In this story, after the celebration of the son's return he is reprimanded by his father, his mother and his brother. The father seems to be a metaphor for god, as the son tells him that when he was away he did not miss him because he always felt close to him, especially in the desert. He did not return home for his father’s love since he had taken that with him, but because his body was cold and starving.

            Marlena came down the line carrying a box that ran out before she got to me. When she came back with another it contained 295 ml cartons of Minute Maid orange juice. She said I could take four.

            A few minutes later she was back pushing a cart of various fruit and juice items. She gave me a two pint pack of blueberries.

            Not long after that a guy that hangs around in front of the food bank and sometimes helps walked down with a box. Sometimes he would toss the bags of white stuff to people and sometimes he handed them to them. I couldn’t tell it was shredded Monterey Jack cheese until he got to me. I took it but noticed it was two weeks past its best before date.

            Marlena came back with half litre cartons of 2% milk and said we could have two. I used to put cream in my coffee, then for many years I used half and half. Now that I usually use skim milk, 2% milk tastes like cream.

            Laressa brought a cart of small red cabbages but I didn’t want any.

            Soon Marlena returned with a box of various frozen dinners from Made With Love. I got the braised chicken thigh with tomato sauce, rice, peas and carrots. Made With Love is a partnership between Community Food Services and local chefs. The initiative is part of the Good Food Access Fund which provides relief during the Covid-19 crisis. The food for the program is cooked by two catering companies in Toronto: Victor Dries and Ascari.

            The last handed out items were the bags of three eggs and Marlena let me grab two.

            Peter came along to sign clients in. I’d forgotten my card number and my card but one’s birth date seems to be no harder to call up on their system. Chico went whizzing past us on his scooter and Peter commented that the recent batch of electric wheelchairs the government is giving out are pretty flimsy by comparison to Chico’s. He said they look like one could lift them with one’s little finger and he suspects that a lot of seniors will be tipping over while driving them because they’re just not very solidly built. I wondered how one gets one of them and he explained that people on ODSP need to have a scooter recommended by a registered therapist.

            I couldn’t find any information about the new wheelchairs, but if they start flipping over as Peter fears then we'll begin hearing about Ontario endangering the lives of the disabled.

            Peter inquired as to what book I was reading and I showed him that it had French on left page and the English translation on the right. He said he needs something like that to brush up on his French. He told me he spent a month in Cyprus a few years ago and by the time he left he could speak Greek, but now it’s all gone.

            Marlena’s last hand-out to the line-up were bags of three eggs each and she gave me two.

            All of the boxes were from Home Depot and I joked that we were getting hardware this time. In addition to the box I was given a mango, a bag of very ripe bananas and a $10 gift card from President’s Choice.

            Inside my box were a lot of items that I had plenty of or didn’t want and so I only took about a third of what was given. I selected a box of Triscuits, four granola bars, a can of red kidney beans and two cans of tuna. I gave the rest away to different people. One guy was surprised that I didn’t want the Sugar Frosted Flakes cereal. A woman took the Wow Butter made from soybeans. I had to walk down the line like a food bank volunteer to get rid of the two boxes of pasta, the two cans of tomato soup, the tin of peas and carrots and the can of pasta sauce.

            There was a fair amount of protein given out this time around, but other than the cabbage there wasn’t much in the way of vegetables. This is the third week that they given out $10 gift cards. It would be nice if that practise continues past the pandemic.

            I went home to put my food away and then I went out to the supermarket. The blonde security guard was there but there was no line-up for her to control.

            The grapes were very cheap and so I got five bags but the cherries cost twice as much and three bags cost me $25.

            I bought a new can opener because the old one has lost its edge and only cuts into parts of some cans, making it so I have to pry the rest open with a fork handle. I think the kind of can opener I bought is the exact kind as before but hopefully it lasts a few years like the old one.

            I got mouthwash, a can of coffee, a whole free range chicken (on the bill it says “free chicken" but it wasn't free), three containers of Greek yogourt and some fruit skyr.

            For lunch I made a mini pizza with a slice of Bavarian sandwich bread, some pasta sauce and two slices of processed cheese.

            In the afternoon I didn’t do my exercises or take a bike ride. I just worked on and finished writing my Food Bank Adventure.

            For dinner I had an egg over easy and a piece of toast with a beer while watching two episodes of The Adventures of Robin Hood.

            In the first story Robin and Marian are enjoying a romantic spring day together but lament the fact that they can’t get married as long as Robin is an outlaw. Robin is confident however that King Richard will return to give him back his estate and they will become the lord and lady of Loxley Manor. Marian says that it's too bad they can’t even visit the Loxley property but Robin says they will go there now. Once Robin is on his property he sees the barn of Martin, one of his elderly tenants, and he decides to check if he is all right. He sees the soldiers of Sir Charles, who has taken over Robin’s estate, evicting Martin. Robin recognizes his old friend Harrowed and calls to him. He learns that Sir Charles is trying to get rid of all of  the Loxley copy holders to prevent them from earning the rights to their land. According to the will of Robin’s father, if copy holders perform certain tasks such as road mending, hedging, ditching and fencing, for their lord then after three years they no longer have to pay any more taxes and only land rent. The three years will be up on Laity Day. Robin holds a meeting with all of the tenants and persuades them to challenge Sir Charles in court. Robin says he will find them a lawyer but no one in the shire wants to argue against the sheriff’s friend Charles. Robin finds a lawyer named Ricardo in the neighbouring shire of Lincoln and the court proceeds with the sheriff as judge. Ricardo says the copy holders have performed their tasks and should on Laity Day hold their lands in perpetuity. But Sir Charles confidently argues that the copy holders have not performed all of their tasks. They have not performed their broom service to Loxley Hall by sweeping, scrubbing and polishing the manor. The lawyer points out that the copy holders have offered to perform those tasks but Sir Charles has refused to admit them to the hall. Sir Charles declares that he has every right as lord of the manor to refuse the copy holders entry. The sheriff rules that if the copy holders do not perform their broom service in the next three days leading up to Laity Day they will all forfeit their claims. Robin arranges for Marian to honour a frequently offered invitation to visit Charles that she has always turned down. While Charles is occupied Robin breaks into the castle and overwhelms the guards. He lets the copy holders in to perform their broom service and Ricardo to legally record their actions. Ricardo is concerned about breaking and entering but Robin argues that only he did the forced entry and he is already an outlaw. The copy holders perform their broom service to all but the main hall where Marian and Charles are. Robin gives Marian the signal and she has Charles show her to her bed chamber. When Marian and Charles leave the room, Robin lets the copy holders in and locks the door from inside. They finish performing their final task just as the bell rings for Laity Day and they thereby become the legal holders of their properties.

            In the second story Sir William has begun to levy a tax on all of those that use the road to Tom’s mill. The villagers need the mill for Tom to grind their grain into flour and Tom needs the villagers patronage in order to stay in business. William wants the mill for himself and is trying to force Tom to sell it. Robin devises a scheme to create a road that does not touch William’s property and so he will not be able to tax it. Ropes are strung from the forest off William’s land to Tom's mill and pullies are used to transport the grain to the mill and the flour back to the forest. Sir William is outraged and expects the notary to declare that a rope system over his land is nonetheless a trespass on his property. But the notary declares that it is not. William is certain that Robin Hood is helping Tom and so he plots to set a trap for him. He plans to take Tom's mill by force, which he is sure will cause Robin and his outlaws to try to rescue the mill. He arranges for the sheriff to be there at the same time to capture Robin Hood. Tom would be arrested for consorting with outlaws and William could have the mill. William does capture the mill and ties up Tom but when Robin hears of this he knows that in rescuing Tom he would make things worse. He surmises that in this case Tom’s best defence would be the Sheriff of Nottingham. The sheriff arrives and frees Tom. To save Sir William, his men hide him in a flour sack and hoist him out onto the road in the air. William’s men are arrested and after the sheriff takes them away Tom finds William suspended in the air. He says he won't pull him in unless he signs a document lifting the road toll so the villagers can come to his mill.