Nina Hartley

            On Friday morning I woke up at 3:30 because I had to pee. Before getting up to go I thought I smelled bedbugs, although it was probably just the smell of grease rising up through my floor from Popeyes downstairs. But after going to the washroom I decided to turn the light on and to do a quick check since I hadn't done so for the last two weeks. There were no bedbugs on my bed or pillow but when I put my finger on a tiny hole in the wall above the baseboard I popped open a bedbug and it spewed fresh blood. I did a thorough search poking into holes with a skewer stick and dug one more bedbug out of a hole at the bottom of the wall that the top of my mattress touches. That one didn't have any fresh blood inside and so I assumed it was not healthy. I guess I should be glad that's all I found but I'd thought they were gone even before the last time the exterminator came ten days ago. They are scheduled to come for a follow up on Tuesday so hopefully they can finish the monsters. 

            I positioned the chords for all the verses of "La java des chaussettes à clous" (The Dance of the Studded Stockings) by Boris Vian. 

            I uploaded "Démodé" (Out of Style) by Serge Gainsbourg to Christian's Translations and started the editing process to prepare it for blog publication. 

            I weighed 89.1 kilos before breakfast. 

            There was an email from U of T announcing that any students that aren't vaccinated will need to participate in a rapid screening program and complete a test twice a week at home. They'll need a negative test result within 72 hours of coming to the campus. I sure am glad I'm vaccinated, as all I have to do is declare that I am vaccinated one time on Ucheck just before coming to class. 

            I called the Admissions office at U of T and didn't have to wait on hold for more than a few seconds. I told the nice young woman my problem about having estimated my income for 2021 at $3000 higher than it actually will be. She gave me the email for the Noah Meltz administrator and told me to tell them what I told her. 

            Because I'd seen bedbugs again I couldn't finish cleaning the bottom of my square baking pan. I had to plaster over the holes where I'd found them. I spent about half an hour applying spackle to any holes and cracks along the western, northern and southern baseboards and walls of my bedroom. I also smoothed over some of the rough areas where there aren't holes but there are lifts in the plaster that I've seen bedbugs hiding behind. I had pulled my mattress away from the walls and I was sitting on the floor when while I was working a bedbug came from under my leg and headed towards the western baseboard. I killed it when it got there but I wondered where it was coming from. It's possible that it had been between my mattress and the wall when I pulled the futon out and then it was just trying to get back. 

            I washed my shorts and socks and put them out on the roof in the sun. 

            I weighed 88.7 kilos before lunch. 

            My socks were dry and my shorts mostly dry when I put them on for my bike ride. It started lightly spitting rain while I was riding through the Annex along Bloor. I went to Bloor and Yonge and took Yonge south to Richmond and then Richmond to Peter and Peter to turn left on Queen. The rain came down a little harder as I headed west but I could still see dry spots on my shorts. The sun came out at around Dovercourt but I was still getting hit by raindrops until I'd passed Dufferin into Parkdale and it stopped. I weighed 88.5 kilos when I got home. 

            There was an email from the Noah Meltz grant office telling me that my problem had been resolved. The person also reminded me to request a fee deferral and also to change to per-course fees rather than program fees. So I did both of those things in just a few minutes. It's so much easier now to do it all online than it used to be. 

            I worked on my poem series "My Blood In A Bug." 

            I imported the video of patients with catatonic schizophrenia into the Movie Maker project of making a video for my song "Instructions For Electroshock Therapy." I put it at the end of the timeline and then trimmed everything but the part that shows one patient staring blankly at the camera. I inserted that into the part of the video where in the studio audio I sing "They can't do any harm without their memory." I'll trim some more of that but first I have to insert after it a clip of my keyboardist Brian Haddon singing "shock therapy." He doesn't do it in the concert video I've been using because he had a sore throat that night. But there are two other concert videos of us doing the song. One of them is at the former 360 Club on Queen Street and there are two moments when the camera is only on Brian while he sings "shock therapy." There's also a video of us performing at the Parkdale Festival. I'll have a look at that to see if Brian's parts can be used but the problem is that we were in the sunshine for that concert and so it may not be the right atmosphere for the dark mood that I'm trying to create for the song in the video. 

            I worked on my "Anti Gravity's Rainbow" photograph trying to make some graffiti on the brick wall behind the skateboarder clearer. 

            I had a potato with gravy and two chicken drumsticks while watching two episodes of Gomer Pyle. 

            In the first story Sergeant Carter is about to turn 35 and Gomer talks the other men in the platoon to each chip in a dollar for a present. He raises $16 and goes to a jewellery store where he annoys the salesman so much that he sells him a watch for that amount just to get rid of him and even gets it engraved. Carter is moved by the sentiment but when the men start comparing his age to theirs he starts to feel old. Later he tries to prove himself by making the men do deep knee bends with him but he injures his back and has to go to sick bay. Gomer is concerned and goes to see the doctor who for some reason goes against doctor-patient confidentiality and discloses what happened during the examination. The doctor says Carter has thirty fiveitis because he's approaching middle age. He says he needs to rebuild his confidence. But when Carter takes them on a hike Gomer makes the mistake of putting straw in Carter's backpack to make it lighter. When Carter discovers this he feels even older and puts in to be transferred to a desk job. The men ask to be taken on one more hike and while they are on it Gomer sprains his ankle. Carter has to carry Gomer back to the base but when he puts him down Gomer reveals he was faking. He tells Carter it proves he's still stronger than any of his men. Carter feels good about that. 

            In the second story a princess is coming to the base and Sergeant Carter's platoon is selected to present the honour guard. But for the honour guard Carter needs four men with dress blues. But not all Marines have dress blues because they are not mandatory and they cost $45. Only three men in the platoon have dress blues while another has ordered them but can't afford to pick them up. Gomer reveals that he has ordered his and will be picking them up on Saturday. Carter doesn't want Gomer to be in the honour guard because he believes that chances are he will fumble. But Carter promised the colonel an honour guard and so he may have to let Gomer do it. Meanwhile Duke has discovered that whenever he gambles with Gomer nearby he wins. He convinces Gomer to come with his to a crap game. He's winning but then Gomer walks away and he loses everything. He talks Gomer into lending him his $45 for the dress blues. But then Duke loses the money. Meanwhile Carter is trying to get the money to pay for the other Marine's dress blues. He goes to a crap game and wins it. He is going to get the dress blues for the other Marine when Gomer comes to tell Carter he lost the money in a crap game. Carter knows that Gomer is covering for someone else and so he gives in and gets the dress blues for Gomer. When the princess arrives it's Carter who fumbles by letting his sword fly out of his hand. 

            After watching the shows I looked for photos of Nina Hartley. I already have most of the ones I want but I did find one of her posing on a white piano that I liked. She's not the average porn star as she wanted to be in porn since she was in high school. When she saw the first porno film ever directed by a woman, "The Autobiography of a Flea" she decided then and there what she wanted to do with her life. She is famous for her big blue eyes, her big and round derriere and for starring in a series of "Debbie Does ..." films. She lectures on sex positivity and has written a book called "Nina Hartley's Guide To Total Sex."